Minivan disease strikes again

Ty'97Cobra · 05-28-2002, 04:53 PM

I'm always on the watch for mini-van drivers. Usually, they are piloted by soccer moms yapping on the cell phone or attending to junior, or both...

Anyway, I'm on a return trip: hour #5.5 of a 6 hour trip on Memorial day. Needless to say, I'm pretty tired of being in the car.
So I'm cruising in the right lane doing 70 in a 65. MINI-VAN alert!!!
I'm gaining on it in the right lane. Fortunately, the left lane is wide open. I signal and move over and start to pass the minivan. I get almost ahead of the minivan and he speeds up and starts pacing me. 'What is he doing??' I'm thinking to myself... Well, at this time, we are coming into a construction zone. The speed limit drops to 55 mph. We pass that sign and we are both going 70ish. I figure he will slow down. Nope, he is pacing me like a champ.

I'm thinking this guy is being a real jerk, he doesn't want to let me over.

Everyone knows, slower traffic keep right. He was going slower when I went to pass him. But then he decided to speed up.

Two more signs pass. My speed hasn't changed. (read cruise control) The signs say, MERGE LEFT. RIGHT LANE ENDS. I guess he chose not to read, or didn't believe the signs because he keeps pace with me in the right lane. I'm going to make a wild guess that he is still trying not to not let me over.

Here come the cones.... In the right lane.

HA HA HA!
Maybe next time he will read the signs. I doubt it. It must be the minivan disease.

StoplightWarrior · 05-28-2002, 05:57 PM

Some minivan drivers are definitely a different breed. I've had some interesting encounters with them over the years. Haha, must be some sort of complex they have considering the piece of poop they are driving!

6T9PONY · 05-28-2002, 08:23 PM

I seriously think there is something about driving a minivan that flips a switch in a person's head.

I, myself, drive my mom's minivan very agressively and rod the piss out of it. One of these days I'm going to blow it up because it has about 120,000 miles on it and all. '95 Chevy Lumina APV...teal/silver two-tone...mag wheels...

IDEA!!!!!! I need to G-Tech the VAN!!!!!! Hmmm....

Tim C · 05-29-2002, 11:32 AM

There is a Federal Law which not too many people know about. If you buy a minivan or suv you are supposed to sign some classified documents. It is strictly need to know. Basically it states:

1. All 80s Chrysler minivans with wood grain stickers MUST fog for mosquitos by burning more oil than gasoline.

2. All Minivans and SUVs must take at least 10 minutes to reach 25 mph from a stop, and must then proceed at full throttle to 5 under the speed limit until a sports car, emergency vehicle, or someone running behind schedule tries to pass. THEN they are to pace, or pass the other vehicle.

3. They are required by law to pull out in front of any vehicle trying to accelerate hard from stop, including a couple of cars racing.j/k

Bet you didnt even know of that law

Tim C

05-29-2002, 03:45 PM

i know them mini van owners are a strange breed. once i was driving my dads F-150 300 i-6 pick up and some kid in his parents mini van wanted to race from the light. i thought hey why not no traffic and so the light turns green and i take off (that truck can shot off a line) and i blew the guy away. so i stop at the next light and he says to me that we coulda taken me if he really wanted too, all i could do was laugh right at him. so he tries to get me to race him out of the light we're at so i say sure so when the light turns green he shoots off and i take off at a normal pace (i had seen a police car sitting in a parking lot). well the cop come winging out and pulls him over and i just drove by and waved at him, at was funny as hell.

PKRWUD · 05-29-2002, 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Tim C
There is a Federal Law which not too many people know about. If you buy a minivan or suv you are supposed to sign some classified documents. It is strictly need to know. Basically it states:

1. All 80s Chrysler minivans with wood grain stickers MUST fog for mosquitos by burning more oil than gasoline.

ROFLMAO!!!! You're not kidding!!! Don't forget the 2.2L K-cars that were the forerunners of the minivans! They were proof that God has a sense of humor.

Take care,
-Chris

KiltedBanshees93GT · 05-30-2002, 12:25 AM

You could cross breed Jeff Gordan and Albert Einstein, and take the resulting hybrid, drop them in a mini-van, and 5 mins later they will be doing 40 in the fast lane with their right blinker on. There is something about those cursed vehicles that smacks of the unholy...LOL

PKRWUD, props for the mighty K-car. Check out the vid, it'll give you a whole new appreciation for the K.
Me and my G/F now use the K the same way people use "punchbuggies/piddidles"

http://www.ifilm.com/ifilm/product/f...957894,00.html
Jorge
AKA The Purveor of All Things Surreal

Mach 1 · 05-30-2002, 09:04 AM

Mini vans can be a good practical vehicle. Can haul passengers, or an engine block. Can sleep in the back, camp out, have sex, change your clothes, etc...

Dont judge the vans because the drivers are idiots.

later

PKRWUD · 05-30-2002, 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mach 1
Mini vans can be a good practical vehicle. Can haul passengers, or an engine block. Can sleep in the back, camp out, have sex, change your clothes, etc...

Dont judge the vans because the drivers are idiots.

later

C'mon Chris, 2/3rds of your suggestions involve the van being parked (not bad suggestions, though)!

You're right, it is the driver, rather than the vehicle, that tends to be the problem. Except of course the first generation of the Mopar bunch that was grafted onto the K-car frame. No one will ever convince me that their 2.2L engine was ever anything more than a bad mistake made by a bunch of hung-over engineers on New Years day, facing a deadline.

Take care,
-Chris

6T9PONY · 05-30-2002, 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PKRWUD
No one will ever convince me that their 2.2L engine was ever anything more than a bad mistake made by a bunch of hung-over engineers on New Years day, facing a deadline.

LMAO!

PKRWUD · 05-30-2002, 06:44 PM

Yeah, I know, but I had to sugar-coat it a little. I didn't want to make them out to sound as bad as they really are, just make a point.

Take care,
-Chris

429mustang · 05-30-2002, 07:03 PM

Chill out dudes, my astrovans getting pissed listening to all this s**t talkin. It said after it gets it's small block 355 (ported/polished/milled heads,perf. rpm intake/cam/carb,pete jackson geardrive) dropped in this month, it's gonna come burn out on all of your front yards, then drive over your mailboxes. Damn, you guys pissed it off real bad.

05-28-2002, 04:53 PM	#1
Ty'97Cobra Registered Member Join Date: Apr 1999 Location: NC Posts: 308	Minivan disease strikes again I'm always on the watch for mini-van drivers. Usually, they are piloted by soccer moms yapping on the cell phone or attending to junior, or both... Anyway, I'm on a return trip: hour #5.5 of a 6 hour trip on Memorial day. Needless to say, I'm pretty tired of being in the car. So I'm cruising in the right lane doing 70 in a 65. MINI-VAN alert!!! I'm gaining on it in the right lane. Fortunately, the left lane is wide open. I signal and move over and start to pass the minivan. I get almost ahead of the minivan and he speeds up and starts pacing me. 'What is he doing??' I'm thinking to myself... Well, at this time, we are coming into a construction zone. The speed limit drops to 55 mph. We pass that sign and we are both going 70ish. I figure he will slow down. Nope, he is pacing me like a champ. I'm thinking this guy is being a real jerk, he doesn't want to let me over. Everyone knows, slower traffic keep right. He was going slower when I went to pass him. But then he decided to speed up. Two more signs pass. My speed hasn't changed. (read cruise control) The signs say, MERGE LEFT. RIGHT LANE ENDS. I guess he chose not to read, or didn't believe the signs because he keeps pace with me in the right lane. I'm going to make a wild guess that he is still trying not to not let me over. Here come the cones.... In the right lane. HA HA HA! Maybe next time he will read the signs. I doubt it. It must be the minivan disease. __________________ 2003 Cobra Convertible - Dark Shadow Gray #2459 of 5082 Visit my city http://diggstown.myminicity.com/

05-28-2002, 05:57 PM	#2
StoplightWarrior Registered Member Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Nor-Cal Posts: 1,311	Some minivan drivers are definitely a different breed. I've had some interesting encounters with them over the years. Haha, must be some sort of complex they have considering the piece of poop they are driving! __________________ Black 2000 GT Auto V2-SQ, Full Steeda G-trac Suspension, Baer Brakes, Saleen Body Kit, Corbeau CR1s, Chrome Cobra R's, etc, etc... 341rwhp, 338 torque 1994 Cobra #4343 Bolt on's only... Cofounder of Raccoon Racing

05-29-2002, 11:32 AM	#4
Tim C Registered Member Join Date: Jul 2000 Location: Fayetteville, NC, USA Posts: 68	Federal Law There is a Federal Law which not too many people know about. If you buy a minivan or suv you are supposed to sign some classified documents. It is strictly need to know. Basically it states: 1. All 80s Chrysler minivans with wood grain stickers MUST fog for mosquitos by burning more oil than gasoline. 2. All Minivans and SUVs must take at least 10 minutes to reach 25 mph from a stop, and must then proceed at full throttle to 5 under the speed limit until a sports car, emergency vehicle, or someone running behind schedule tries to pass. THEN they are to pace, or pass the other vehicle. 3. They are required by law to pull out in front of any vehicle trying to accelerate hard from stop, including a couple of cars racing.j/k Bet you didnt even know of that law Tim C

05-30-2002, 12:25 AM	#7
KiltedBanshees93GT Registered Member Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Pigeon Forge Tn Posts: 611	You could cross breed Jeff Gordan and Albert Einstein, and take the resulting hybrid, drop them in a mini-van, and 5 mins later they will be doing 40 in the fast lane with their right blinker on. There is something about those cursed vehicles that smacks of the unholy...LOL PKRWUD, props for the mighty K-car. Check out the vid, it'll give you a whole new appreciation for the K. Me and my G/F now use the K the same way people use "punchbuggies/piddidles" http://www.ifilm.com/ifilm/product/f...957894,00.html Jorge AKA The Purveor of All Things Surreal Last edited by KiltedBanshees93GT; 05-30-2002 at 12:30 AM..

05-30-2002, 09:04 AM	#8
Mach 1 Registered Member Join Date: May 1999 Location: Georgia Posts: 3,866	Mini vans can be a good practical vehicle. Can haul passengers, or an engine block. Can sleep in the back, camp out, have sex, change your clothes, etc... Dont judge the vans because the drivers are idiots. later __________________ 2002 GT 1993 GT (SOLD) '93 Mustang GT RHC member #142

05-28-2002, 08:23 PM	#3
6T9PONY All about the Windsor. Join Date: Feb 2000 Posts: 2,052	I seriously think there is something about driving a minivan that flips a switch in a person's head. I, myself, drive my mom's minivan very agressively and rod the piss out of it. One of these days I'm going to blow it up because it has about 120,000 miles on it and all. '95 Chevy Lumina APV...teal/silver two-tone...mag wheels... IDEA!!!!!! I need to G-Tech the VAN!!!!!! Hmmm....

05-29-2002, 03:45 PM	#5
digital3.3 Guest Posts: n/a	i know them mini van owners are a strange breed. once i was driving my dads F-150 300 i-6 pick up and some kid in his parents mini van wanted to race from the light. i thought hey why not no traffic and so the light turns green and i take off (that truck can shot off a line) and i blew the guy away. so i stop at the next light and he says to me that we coulda taken me if he really wanted too, all i could do was laugh right at him. so he tries to get me to race him out of the light we're at so i say sure so when the light turns green he shoots off and i take off at a normal pace (i had seen a police car sitting in a parking lot). well the cop come winging out and pulls him over and i just drove by and waved at him, at was funny as hell.

05-30-2002, 06:44 PM	#11
PKRWUD Junior Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Ventura, California Posts: 8,981	Yeah, I know, but I had to sugar-coat it a little. I didn't want to make them out to sound as bad as they really are, just make a point. Take care, -Chris __________________ Webmaster: Rice Haters Club Jim Porter Racing Peckerwoods Pit Stop Support Your Local RED & WHITE!

05-30-2002, 07:03 PM	#12
429mustang Registered Member Join Date: May 2001 Location: westerville, OH USA Posts: 618	Chill out dudes, my astrovans getting pissed listening to all this s**t talkin. It said after it gets it's small block 355 (ported/polished/milled heads,perf. rpm intake/cam/carb,pete jackson geardrive) dropped in this month, it's gonna come burn out on all of your front yards, then drive over your mailboxes. Damn, you guys pissed it off real bad. __________________ 1990 Notchback: BBK Ceramic Coated Full length headers, Dr. Gas 3"- 2 1/2" x-pipe, Flowmaster 40's/turndowns.

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