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Biggest (insert 4 letter word here) ever!
Okay here's the deal. I know a girl who's cute, sweet, and cool to be around, but you guessed it, she's got an ****** for a boyfriend. That's the easy part to guess for all the guy members on this board. She definately falls into the standard nicest girls go out with the worst guys scenerio. http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...d/confused.gif
I'm not joking about this guy's correct category. I'll refer to her as Jane, and him as John. John has a kids from a previous relationship, he's about 10 years older than Jane. It's nice that he wants to be a father, but even though he's got secondary custody, Jane takes a far 2nd place with him, and they've been going out for 5 years. To give you an idea about that how far in 2nd, he showed up to give her flowers http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...d/rolleyes.gif on her birthday, but didn't spend any time with her because he was going to see his kids. Now I agree on occation he's going to be spending time with his kids and unavailible, but it's her fricken birthday! It only comes around once a year, ******* ! He's a total hothead to, getting pissed over nothing and constantly making Jane feel like crap. As she continues to be with him in this relationship, it continues on it's downward spiral. When she tries to help work on cars, he'll get mad when she doesn't know something, flip out and start calling her stupid and yelling and throwing things in the garage until she's ready to cry. The only time he usually even drops by is to ask what she's making for him to eat, and to get a quickie. But last night, he pulled the biggest bunch of **** I have ever even heard of. Get this the ******* is working on Jane's car (late 80's Ford, not a 'stang) and he breaks the plastic fuel line while the car is on the lift. :0 What a moron! Anyway, he get's super pissed off and manages to get it back to her house (not sure how) and he proceeds to ram the car up her driveway with his truck, smashing the trunk in as he goes. Then the sorry ******* spaz's out at her, yelling at her, and putting her down until she's crying and feels totally miserable! http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...gboard/mad.gif I've been telling her that she could do better lately, but like I told her today, I don't think she could do any worse. As far as I can reason, there is no redemption possible for this guy, and that crap he just pulled has beyond proved it's time for him to get his pink slip in relations. I've told her to check this site and topic out, and I'm hoping seeing what another 100 people think will give her the strength to give this guy the boot! What's everyone else's opinion? |
Well, I'm sure this has been said before but to me, common sense dictates that if someone is unhappy in a relationship, they will leave. At least that's how I have always conducted myself, and I think that is how stable, rational people would conduct themselves. So either she doesn't have all her beans in the bowl or she likes the abuse, otherwise whe would get out. I would steer clear and let her work it out.
------------------ 87 GT Full exhaust, K&N, KB Subs, BBK STB, homeade dumps... 87 Taurus New York Winters Bite! |
I think see should get out of there. I love my wife and never act like that to her. Everyone gets mad but this guy sounds like a lunitic. Unfortunately in my experience you can not say anything because "jane" must realize this on her own or she could get upset with you. I hope she does read this topic and gets the strength to leave.
Too often people put up with this type of abuse and get hurt (perhaps seriously). And even if she doesn't ever get hurt physically (and I'm not so sure she's safe after reading your post) the mental abuse could be 10 time worse. These kind of people really piss me off, ever since I got married. People need to learn some respect for other people. ------------------ White 1995 Mustang GT Dynomax Cat-Back, Offroad H-pipe, K&N Filters w/o Air Silencer My 1995 Mustang GT http://members.mustangworks.com/95mu...must-white.jpg |
If one of Jane's friends were in the same situation, I bet Jane would advise her to get out of the relationship.
I had a friend of mine tell me a month ago how she was ready to marry her boyfriend and thought he was going to ask her too. She just called two days ago and informed me that she caught him sleeping with his ex-girlfriend. This is not the first problem they have had either. I told her she should dump his sorry *** right now, but she says she "loves him" and is staying with him. I don't know why some people put up with it all http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...d/confused.gif |
I think she should get out. Sounds like her safety could be an issue. Umm it's funny how people will put up with **** they shouldn't have to when the love someone or think they love them. But love is a powerful thing. I would also stay out of her way and let her make the decision. If she asks for you opinion tell her the truth. But other than that stay clear. Or you could give me the guys address and I'll make a trip and have a "talk" with him. http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...board/wink.gif
------------------ 89GT,T-5Z, D.S.S. 306 shortblock w\main support, B-303 cam, Cobra intake, GT40P heads, 1.72rr, MAC "P" headers, MAC off-road H-Pipe, MAC true-fit w\tips, 373's...and the list goes on! Throttle Junkie Powered by Ford! 12.824 @ 107.05 MPH |
Usually I try to stay out of stuff like this, but I'd advise her to drop that guy immediately! If he has no problem destroying the trunk of her car because he's flipping out, what's to stop him from going a step further and hurting her?
Your friend sounds like a great woman who makes others happy and deserves to be happy herself. Heck, I'd kill for a girl who was interested in helping me work on my car, regardless of skill level! Hope she ends up making the right choice... ------------------ Greg 91 LX Convertible |
The guy sounds like a real zero. Hey Unit, any alterior motives? Be careful, sounds like this guy is the type that is capable of going after you.
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i'm gonna go with everyone else on this one, she has to get out. that guy sounds like an accident waiting to happen, and she may be the accident. i agree w/ ripper too, if you do care for her, and show it watch yourself cuz the guy sounds whacked!
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Hey I agree with the phrase he who cares the least wins but that guy is taking it way too far. He sounds like a real *** hole. If it were me, I would probably go and whip his *** but be careful if you do that or you may ruin your friend ship with her. I hope everything works out and she leaves him, anyway whatever you decide to do, good luck.
------------------ James Cox nochevy@hotmail.com 1991 Mustang LX Best 1/8 time on motor 7.686 @90.20mph |
Alterior motives? Hmmm... Probably, being a single guy, the more girls worth dating you know, the better your chances at finding somebody you really like.
Which is why I asked for all of your opinions. You don't have alterior motives, I might, she's got to know that. I know that people have to decide for themselves, I cannot and will not attempt to make a decision for her, but I hope seeing how many people out there that are in her corner may give her a little extra that it might take to dump this *** . Peer pressure! Haha! http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...rd/biggrin.gif |
tell her, dump that sh!thead..life is too short to get treated like crap, especially when there are sooooo many other people out there that are willing and capable of being a good mate..
thats my two pennies |
Unit...why dont you nicely let John know how you feel about him with your foot http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...oard/smile.gif
------------------ 1991 GT,T-5,air silencer removed,racing clutch(previous owner put in so dont know what kind),K&N air filter,Aiwa deck,power acoustic amp,2 12" pianeers,UPDATE: Just got my Mac long tube headers By the time summer comes ill have full Mac exhaust,new shifter knob and what ever else i can afford |
I second DemonGT.... "John" sounds like he need his *** beat.
------------------ 98 Mustang coupe 3.8L V6 87 Mustang GT hatchback 5.0L V8 87 Bronco XLT 4bbl 351W My mom drives a 99 Mustang GT convertable. |
Yeah, he does need his *** whooped. I'm not going to step in and do it unless she wants to end it with him and he tries to cause her trouble. Stepping into a relationship that way, can cause some major problems.
"Jane" has been reading these posts, so keep them coming, I'm not in trouble yet! |
"Jane" needs to wake up and see the real world. If my post seems harsh and too direct, it IS meant that way. The reality of the situation is that his behavior is going to escalate. Now he only verbally abuses her and throws things around. Sometime soon he will "accidently" throw something in her direction. Then things will get thrown at her. Then he will make sure he actually hits her with something.
The verbal abuse will slowly turn into verbal and physical abuse. It is only a matter of time. We see it ALL the time. Ft. Worth F.D. is dispatched on all 911 calls as we can usually beat the ambulance and the cops to the scene by several minutes. There will be some woman who has a split lip or bloody nose and it is her husband/boyfriend/piece of human filth that has "lost it". When the cops arrive and start to handcuff him it is "Oh no, he didn't mean it" or "It's my fault, I made him mad" or some other garbage like that. And then she takes him back!!!!!?????!!!!! Go to the battered women's shelters{if you can find one as they usually keep the location secret,for good reason}and ask these beat up women how it all started. Find a cop or two that will talk to you about what they have seen. Now that I think about it, I believe we have a couple of law officers who post here. Hopefully they will speak up. "Jane" needs to get this loser out of her life. Now. |
Like said above, first he smashes her car then sooner or later it will be her face.
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I think Jane needs to realize that there are thousands upon thousands of nice, decent, good looking guys out there that WOULD treat her right. It's time for her to just suck it up and kick this guy to the curb... It's only going to get worse...
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what a sad situation...
maybe the bigger problem is that she's scared to dump him? |
If she is afraid of what will happen when she dumps him then she really needs to get him out of her life. I know that it seems like a paradox but it is true. The longer she lets this go on the worse it will be when she does make the break.
Fear should NEVER be a factor. If fear is a factor in a relationship, then it is not a healthy relationship. Cravnpup said it, there are literally thousands of men out there who will not belittle her, who will treat her right. |
I HATE to hear guys mistreating women (especially nice women), Arrrrh! http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...gboard/mad.gif It's even worse when the woman allows it. Unit, I know it's gotta be hard to watch what is going on, especially when Jane won't get herself out of that relationship.
I think there is plenty of good advice on this board (esp the last few). It's hard to say to Jane "hey just dump the butthole". There's more to it than just that. Also, it's hard to understand why she would stay with someone who treats her like a dog, unless I talked to her personally. for Jane: Jane, please, think about your situation hard. Spend at LEAST 15 solid minutes before you go to bed (you gotta do this for yourself). Is the relationship worth the pain? I have no girlfriend right now. Yes, I would like one NOW, but I CANNOT just go with anyone and settle for "less" (I know in your case, it's more than just the simple "boyfriend/girlfriend" issue). But plainly and simply, one big thing I have learned from my measly 23 years of existence on this earth is that the old-timer's saying, There's plenty of fish in the sea," is TRUE. That is very true. Aside from all this, Jane, you are worth more than some idiots occasional lay. John doesn't deserve a woman like you. Also he's too old and used up for you. Please don't take this kinda of crap from John the geek. He SUCKS. All men should treat their ladies as nothing less than Princesses. Don't you think so? On another note, Jane, do you like being mistreated? Do you think it's natural for a guy to treat his woman like this nerd is treating you? I hope you don't. (if you do, see a psychiatrist). If you stay in that relationship, don't be surprised if he starts abusing you physically (he already does it mentally)--it comes with the territory. Like cleengreenmachine stated: "Heck, I'd kill for a girl who was interested in helping me work on my car, regardless of skill level," that goes for me too. How the heck does this buttwipe, have such a lack of gratitude towards a woman who's trying to help him on his car to yell at her and call her stupid??!! AARGGGH. He pisses me off. Does he make himself feel better by putting you down? OOOOOOHHH, he's a real man (being highly sarcastic). I need to stop writing, I'm getting too PISSED http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...gboard/mad.gif Just leave the moron and get yourself a better man (you don't have to get another man, just leave the fool). I have no doubt that you'd be able to find another one (how about Unit?--just a thought). Princess Jane, YOU DESERVE BETTER! http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...oard/smile.gif Disclaimer: Now, all I have to go off of is Unit's side of the story (don't know Jane's and don't know John's), if Unit got it wrong, then it's not my fault. I'm pretty sure he got it right, however. “…because, no one’s really gonna be free until nerd persecution ends.” ---Revenge of the Nerds ------------------------------- '79 Mustang Coup 4" Cowl Weld wheels (15x6;15x8) Stock 5.8L C4 w/ shift kit 1.5" MAC full length headers Holley 750 CFM Edelbrock intake 2.5" Off road H-pipe 8.8" Rear end w/ 2.73:1 gears (sucks!) (awaiting installation of 3.55s) Front: 225/60/15 Rear: 255/60/15 Eagle GT II Sucky Purolator air filter that's choking my car. http://www.mustangworks.com/interact...gboard/mad.gif |
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