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Old 01-18-2002, 03:02 AM   #1
Mustangbelle306
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Default A Explanation of Myself, and an Open Invite to All...

I recently recieved a PM from a Mustangworker conveying to me the fact that he has received several PMs centered on the subject that...I am a biatch. (sorry for the respelling, but I really thought female dog sounded pretty lame...)

I've always attempted to offer sincere advice to my fellow Mustangers, and this both disappointed and saddened me deeply. I suppose, 1# for the fact that although my posts may sometimes seem harsh, I only mean to help the person that is requesting a response, and #2 that in the time that it took to relay this opinion to someone else, it could easily have been brought to MY attention, since of course...it is concerning ME

I hope that from now on, if anyone feels a pressing issue with either my attitude or one of my posts, they will come to ME with the concern. I am open to debate and constructive criticism always, because I can always learn about myself from others...however this becomes impossible when things are said on the down low, and in a high school girl manner behind my back...

The message also advised me that I try too hard to protect "what's right" from "what's wrong". I guess I've been through sooo many negative experiences that I've learned from...and when I see someone I care about on this forum going through the same stuff, I get so adamant about trying to show them what's going on, because I wish so badly that someone had been there to help ME when I was down in the dumps. I've made SO many countless mistakes going down the road of trying to figure out who I am, that all I ever wanted to do was to maybe save someone else from doing the same exact thing.

I've always heard from unhappy men about how they wish women would stop beating around the bush, and be upfront with how they feel, and what they mean. So, I always tried to never misrepresent myself, and make sure that my feelings were clearly understood. Apparently, this is not as desirable as I once imagine...kinda like telling your best friend she looks like a whale in her prom dress.

Fine. I will no longer comment on any relationship or gender-related thread. I only wanted to give people my view on a topic, as I enjoy reading the responses of others, regardless of whether or not I agree with them.

I understand that not everyone appreciates the blunt approach when it concerns a personal matter. I empthasize...but how shall I know to shut up...if no one tells me? The only person that has ever been honest with me is Mercury, and since he has confided in me how he feels about my responses, I will never answer another of his posts in a harsh manner...seems pretty easy huh...

Ask, and you shall receive.

Sincerely yours, Belle.
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Old 01-18-2002, 03:11 AM   #2
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I love bluntness. I'm a pretty blunt person, and when it comes to the female kind, it's something I don't see all too often, but when I do see it, I notice it and enjoy it. With some subjects, bluntness can sound rude, of course. But like she said, "Ask, and you shall receive." I believe everyone is entitled to have and state their opinions. First Amendment of the Consistution (see, I know SOMETHING...haha).

I have definitely noticed blunt comments that showed complete honesty from you, Belle, but I admire that, even if it does come out a little rude.

We should all be able to handle the opinions of other people.
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Old 01-18-2002, 03:16 AM   #3
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Thanks for your reply Pony, I appreciate your INPUT

What I really find humorous, is that these mystery parties are probably the same types that whine that women expect them to be mind readers

Which again...is why I encourage anyone to feel free to talk to me about ANYTHING. I can't possibly know the full extent of my comments, unless someone tells me
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Old 01-18-2002, 03:37 AM   #4
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Belle-I must say this..

In the time that you posted this ,I was just commenting in the ladies section on how refreshing it was to find a site that so many female members. The influx of women into a male dominated sport only helps to inhance and bring to insight to an already awesome hobby and business such as ours...

Personally though,I am new here and I have read a great many of the posts to get a feel of how everyone was before committing to a new "regular" site where I may wish to OFFER my opinion and expeirence.From the posts n threads that either you responded to that were mine or that we shared ,it is of my opinion that your are straight forward...nothing wrong with that as it leaves little room for reading between the lines like so many people brought on computers do. That last sentence leading me to say this and no disrespect intended to anyone who reads this but,if more people(certain internet writers/posters) would step out from in front of the screen and learn to more socially communicate on a one to one /face to face situation,they would also become better people on the net....

sorry I rambled...

I think you are just swell since you replied to my ,"I'm new "thread...LOL

Do what you do best and keep giving us your thoughts...no one can take those from you..thats what makes you who you are...

did this post make me sound too old?
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Old 01-18-2002, 04:29 AM   #5
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Default Re: A Explanation of Myself, and an Open Invite to All...

Quote:
Originally posted by Mustangbelle306
The message also advised me that I try too hard to protect "what's right" from "what's wrong".
Belle, I'm assuming that this is NOT a quote and directed to me from my post i made a little bit ago to Stang Crazy? If it is, it was not geared towards you. It was analyzing the whole scenerio in my eyes. Not you and how you view things......
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Old 01-18-2002, 08:36 AM   #6
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Belle, I hope that u will NOT change your ways for that is who u are, and I respect, and like it that way. I feel that if they cannot come to u directly, then it is not important enough for u to change.

I give u permision to reply to anyone of my comments, and if I do not like it, I will come to u directly.

I hope that u don't change your ways for that this site will truely miss a big hunk of importantness and wisdom.

For the others that are not brave enough to stand up for what they belive in, and have to "talk behind ones back", shame on u!
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Old 01-18-2002, 08:48 AM   #7
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Default I will be blunt just as you are

I am fairly new here but have been here long enough to read quite a handful of your posts. I thought you would like to know the impression you first gave me. It seemed to me that you liked to argue. I often saw that you were quick to show disagreement with someone elses opinion. You say that you want to help people that have gone through the things that you have been through. but it always seemed like you were talking down to people.

Now before you get upset for anything I wrote, please let me continue. This was only an impression. I realize that I don't know you very well and therefore have no right to make a judgement on your character. I thought you would be interested to hear what I first thought about you.

My opinion is this. Don't change anything you say or do for anyone. This is who you are and you shouldn't care what anyone else thinks. I had a negative first impression of you but i wouldn't want you act any differently. There are plenty of people here who appreciate you, and for those that don't, well, they can go somewhere else.
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Old 01-18-2002, 09:13 AM   #8
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Belle...
I know i've read and been involved with several posts.. You are just fine. Everyone is entitled to their opinions...not that everyonr else has to agree with it. That's why I love this place. It is so diverse.

Stay the way you are. People call me a bit**, and I look at them and say Thanks I've been working on perfecting it all my life, guess i got it

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Old 01-18-2002, 09:25 AM   #9
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Cool

It is very hard to obtain the emotions, and true meening of a person's thoughts, and feelings when they are written. That is why we invented punctuation marks to help out with the "confusion". We also have these cool faces that help out even more.

I value your opinion just like everybody elses opinion on this site. You opinion is just that.... YOUR OPINION! The is no law that says that we HAVE to take the opinion of someone elses. I look at it as a suggestion and nothing more. If people have a problem with that, they don't know what the definition of "opinion" is.

I like your bluntness! I wish more women had that quality. I do think that while bluntness is GOOD if it is not delivered in a constructive maner, then it can be interperted as being rude.

DON'T CHANGE because someone has an issue with a post. You should never alter you as a person for someone else reguardless of the situation. I look forward to your opinions because you are the same age as me and have similar interests. I hope you will continue to voice your opinion reguardless of who objects!
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Old 01-18-2002, 09:54 AM   #10
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Belle, Dont worry bout it. Your you and thats why people love you. You feel free to respond to anythread I start. I know your intentions and take them to heart so dont worry about making me mad or hurting my feelings. Your advice has helped me out on several occasions and I would llike to use this oppuetunity to thanks you for that. Once again, feel free to speak your mind and do only what YOU feel is right. Dont let anyone influence you into doing or saying anything that makes you feel not as yourself.

Brad
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Old 01-18-2002, 09:57 AM   #11
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:19 AM   #12
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Smile Attitudes and opinions

MustangBelle306:

I'm sorry you feel any need to apologize for your previous comments and opinions on the forum. I can't see why. Your opinion is as important as anyone else's and any reader is quite free to ignore anything anyone else says here, on any subject.

On a personal note; I find your comments to be rather mature and well articulated for someone just out their teens and still in college.
That doesn't mean that I always agree with every point you make but - so what? That's why it's called a 'discussion forum'. The idea is to get various opinions from a wide variety of people, not simply to have a group hug and agree on everything all the time. That would be boring and rather useless.

We all understand that communicating through text only, without the benefit of voice inflection and facial and body language, is a real challenge.

I would advise every poster to read and re-read his/her post before sending it and be willing to go back and edit it if necessary.

'Attitude' is the key.

I've deleted more than one of my own posts that I realized came off rather harsh or too blunt after I finished reading it - but before sending it. I wanted to advise and possibly help, not lecture or attempt to prove that I know more than somebody else because that usually isn't the case. We're all simply offering another point of view someone asking for advice might have missed.

We can always add a few words to posts such as 'In my opinion" or "perhaps you might consider..." in place of "You're wrong" or "You need to do this right now". It can convey a more helpful attitude and since words are all we have on the forums we want to use them as best we can. The use of a few modifiers can help to cast advice or opinions in a friendlier light rather than the harsh way it might be seen by some who take offense when they feel they are being lectured to.

Bottom line is that I hope you won't allow a few negative comments stop you from stating your opinions here. Use tact - of course - but feel free to opine as you wish and if others disagree, let them show you where - or how - you're wrong, and prove it - instead of simply calling you names.

If your words make sense and are delivered in a reasonable tone and manner than I see no rationale for anyone objecting. I don't.
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:21 AM   #13
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There you go Belle-clean bill of health,now go out there and kick somebody in the shin...LOL
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:26 AM   #14
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Oh yeah, one more thing

Do you feel better now Belle?

We are here for ya chick!
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:28 AM   #15
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Silly Topless! I made this thread before you posted that! I think at least...either way, no it was not directed at you at all, it was a quote from the PM

I must say that the responses I got were not the ones I expected!!! You guys have seriously impressed me with your answers, and reminded me of why I decided to stay at Mustangworks a year ago (yep, a year in February )

I do realize what you say is right...someone that cannot come to me with a problem is not really my friend...they just want to stir up the pot, but don't actually care about if its something I should actually think about...because they don't even have the CAJONES to confront me

However, reading back I do realize my posts were HARSHER than I intended, which is something that concerns me very much ...like I said, I've never wanted to misrepresent myself, and by coming across as more b**chy than I really am, I did just that!

So, from now once I'll make sure my posts relate exactly how I feel, whether it be nice....OR NOT!!!!!!!
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:29 AM   #16
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Thumbs up

Just keep posting. You are entitled to an opinion as long as you don't directly insult someone or rave on something that makes no sense, I think you can respond as you wish.

Mr 5.0 does make an excellent comment about re-reading posts. Not only can you check the "mood" of your post, but you can recheck for spelling and grammer . Not that you personally have bad spelling and grammer, but some here do .

Personally, I've never been offended by anything you've ever posted belle; course I haven't been offended by many posts around here, thanks to our good moderators.
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:33 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally posted by C Pony Go
There you go Belle-clean bill of health,now go out there and kick somebody in the shin...LOL
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that is the funniest thing I've heard all day!!!!!

I think you are an extremely valuable addition to the board with both your sense of humor and your mechanical knowledge and experience! (NO! that doesn't mean you're old...it means you're WISE hee hee)

Thanks Again!
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:33 AM   #18
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everytime Mr 5.0 chimes in, I feel like my father is around. This is not a bad thing. My father has never steered me wrong in life. I value his advice. This is the way I feel when I read a post from Mr 5.0.

Belle, everyone else has pretty much stated what needs to be said. Follow your heart kid and you'll never go wrong.
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:34 AM   #19
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Thats why there is a preview button,Belle. More peolpe should take the time to re-read before just smacking the submit button...

Don't sweat the small stuff...Happy 1 year B-Day...did I read that the site owners give out prizes for anniversaries...LOLOLOLOL.j/k
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Old 01-18-2002, 10:49 AM   #20
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Thumbs up LOVE THAT PREVIEW BUTTON!

Quote:
Originally posted by C Pony Go
Thats why there is a preview button,Belle. More peolpe should take the time to re-read before just smacking the submit button...

I LOVE THE PREVIEW BUTTON!!!! I preview every post i make and reread it to make sure it gets the right feeling across and does not step on any toes!! That was a great addition to the boards!!!!! I dont always catch the grammer mistakes, but its well worth it!!!
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