Funny~ Ya'll know it's time to go home!
 

When...

1. I have absolutely no idea where my jacket,bag and or purse is.

2. I believe that dancing with my arms over my head and my butt wiggling while yelling "woo-hoo" is truly the sexiest dance move around.

3. I've suddenly decided I want to kick someone's *** and honestly believe I could do it too.

4. In my last trip to pee, I realize I now look more like an Oxford Street tranny than the goddess I was just four hours ago.

5. I ve managed to spill my last three drinks on people while im given ur on the dance floor.

6. I start telling everyone I see that I love them soooooo much.

7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work.

8. I've found a deeper,spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.

9. The man I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher.

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing becomes strangely overwhelming.

11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.

12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.

13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me just coke, but that's because I can no longer taste the rye.

14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the bathroom floor.

15. I start every conversation with a booming, "Don't take this the wrong way, but...."

16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it

17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.

18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor, wherever I happen to be standing, and take a quick nap.

19. I begin leaving the buttons open on my button-fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the washroom away from my drink

20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight

:p

lol Have you ever noticed when there is a woman in that condition around all the men are licking their chops like the wolf in little red ridding hood lol That was good because it was so accurate !! :p

*LOL*

sounds familiar ;)

Hell yeah! I wanna party with this chick!

:D

Take care,
~Chris

LADY :p

I knew that was going to ruffle some feathers, but "I want to party with this lady" didn't sound right when I yelled it at my computer.

No offense.

Besides, I think chicks are the greatest. Just ask God, she'll tell you.

:)

Take care,
~Chris

Cha-Ching!!!
If that doesn't score any points, I don't know WHAT will...

Good recovery Pkrwud... :cool:

Smoooth as silk.... you're my kinda dude :D

-J

Re: Funny~ Ya'll know it's time to go home!
 

You mean it's not? :confused:

:p back at ya!

LOL. Okay people, you have to grasp a little of my reality here.

First off, I don't practice any religion, but I am spiritual. None the less, if in fact there is a God, it would HAVE to be a woman. As tough as we like to think we are, guys, the plain and simple truth is that women are the ones that have it the hardest. And what do they get after their long, hard day? They get to cook dinner and pamper their husband, and play along with his fantasy that he is the one that's suffering.

Sorry guys, but it's a crock. Who is it that carries the child and gives birth? Who is it that completely alters there life for said child. Who is it that will always and forever be there for said child, even if it means through a divorce. Who is it that has to wear the Mommy hat, the "good housewife" hat, and the disciplinarian hat, simultaneously, and never get's thanked? Who is it that will spend hours trying to make sure that everything you could possibly want or need has been purchased, and is in house for you when you ask for it, yet who is never thanked for it, and in fact is often criticized because she forgot those damn chips you like. She probably does your laundry for you, too.

Then when the kid is in school, she's the one coordinating the childs clothes and school needs, and will probably go back to work, too, while still wearing all those hats that she wore before. AND, she has to be understanding when you come home and whine about how rough you have it.

I have seen women ride out horrific relationships for the sake of the kids, and I've seen them go through the kind of hell that would send most men running for their Mothers, without batting an eye.

Gentlemen, I would gladly take this woman out for a night on the town, but that has nothing to do with the reasons why I firmly believe that if in fact there is a God, She's a Woman.

I just had to make that clear.

Thanks.

Take care,
~Chris

Didn't mean to drag anyone down.

Sorry.

:)

SO, if god is a chick, I wonder if the Devil hits on her?:p

i have to dis agree god is a man, jesus wasnt a women, he was a man, in god's form. end of subject. , my question is why a chick from chi-town say's - ya'll lol, lol. ;) :D :D :D :D :D :D

And she drives a mustang..........Thank you GOD

...AND has a 'murder'cycle :D (that's what I call 'em)

'02 GSXR according to her sig.

600cc??? I want one *jealous tone*:(

:p

ultraflow, a guy at work has a 90 gt that look's almost like yours , same wheel's, just not as big tires on back, he want's 5k for it, i wish i had the money, he's put a lot of part's on it, love that car, but , i still wanna know how a girl from chi-town say's ya'll , lol
:D :D :D :D :D

Hell, I'm from Peoria, IL and I say ya'll sometimes... dunno, guess it's my hillbilly roots coming out, lol. All us Skaggs' come from the hills of Kentucky... and my mom's side is from Georgia... so I'm doomed, no matter how you look at it.

As for MissBlondie, she'll have to explain herself, I guess.

Crazy, I'd like to have another Fox body to cruise around in, but all my cash gets spent on the one I already have, lol.

It's a never ending struggle to get that quicker/faster timeslip :D

i hear ya bro, i spend any spare change on my 2k pos, the o/r x pipie was my best bang for my buck's, hey i had a great-great grannpa from mass. hell he fought for the south :eek: my wife is from n.j she alway's rag's on me for it. hell it dont matter that was 150 years ago. l8ter. ;) :D :D :D

SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHH !!!! Geeeeeeeze Chris be careful ! You could destroy thousands of years of work that it took to get us here. If they ever discover how much power they truly have over us we're doomed !!! ;)

Hehe, yeah, I can see your point. I have been known, on occasion, to speak without first considering the consequences. I figure here it doesn't matter. Everyone either knows me, or has heard a bunch of BS about me, so either way, it usually get's overlooked unless it's mechanical. lol.

Marty-
You know that both of my parents were ordained ministers, so you know I've been exposed to some very deep religious beliefs. But I still contend that he's a She, and that's NOT a bad thing.

Peace-
~Chris

Well, if u want to get down to it, GOD would be niether a man, nor woman. The saying goes that we were molded in (his) image. We say him, his, he, because u can't label GOd as an it. But if we were really molded in (his) image, then (he) would have to be either a unisex, or sipmly, a being. This is what I think, GOD, being a being (<--doesn't sound right?) apears to the person in how they think he will look. For Chris, it would a be a Chick(Women). For Marty, it would be a man, for me, basicly a talking cloud.

LOL! Yeah, but it was Men that wrote the book.

:)

Take care,
~Chris

Hey Ultraflo I'm originally from Heyworth ( thats a small town 10 mins. south of Bloom/Normal) :)

My mom is originally from Georgia, and has a very strong southern accent, so I picked it up when I was younger, and have lost most of it, but I grew up on a farm and am a country girl at heart ya'll :D What's wrong with that :confused:

And my gixxer is a 600 blue/white.

~Jill
;)

LOL
 

Hey Jill,

That was the story of my life. ROFL... Common occurrance. j/k. Figured out as long as it's not tequila I'm drinking the fist fights are kept to a minimum.

Thanks again...And for all the she-god talk...Geez..Thread rewind......Drinking story...OK....

Funny, Jill!

Jenn
aka Jane of all Trades

Girl you know that's true.... haha I have a habit of making everyone feel loved when I'm intoxicated... and singing and dancing minus the clothing thiing... haha... needless to say I don't handle my alcohol very well.. lol

Hey Jill,
Ever been to a small town called Farmer City which is east of Bloomington about 30 miles on I-74? I used to live there. And if the town you came from is anything like Farmer City I can understand why you say Y'all :)

ROFL
 

Oh Yeah! Totally relate. Funny how when you're in your early twenties, you THINK you can hndle your alcohol.

Now in my early thirties I KNOW EXACTLY how I handle my alcohol. Never fun when you wake up the next morning..."I'm ? and I did ?"..Momentary adrenaline rush with the fight or flight reaction in full gear...LOL...Too funny...

I opt to WATCH the freaks and geeks now! Too damn entertaining. Especially the slurry drunk babes' boyfriends. That's always nice to see a poor guy hiding in shame cause his woman is lap dancing the birthday guy at table #42. Oh yeah! Proud to be a woman...ROFLMAO.

Jenn

Yeah I know of that city... If you lived there you had to of heard of Heyworth... It's by LeRoy, Downs.... I have family over in Gibson City... :) See now those are some small country towns.. heehee..


Jenn~ I'd be the girl thinking shes a superstar lapdancin... cept I have no bf... hahahaha.. and I wonder why :p

LOL
 

(psst...arn't we all, but should we let the guys in on this much? You and I together could put most of these gents in the hospital, honey!)

ROFL..

(puts finger to mouth) Shhhhhh...

Jennifer
aka The Lap Dancin' Queen of Sacrameno, CA...LOL

Re: LOL
 

What??? haha I'm just a innocent lil country girl, don't know what you're talkin bout ;)

There we Go!
 

There ya go! Ok, good recovery. Don't think "they" noticed. ;) :D

I'm smooooth http://www.ricehatersclub.com/forum/...es/singing.gif
http://www.ricehatersclub.com/forum/...lies/dance.gif

Re: There we Go!
 

Didn't miss a single word, lol! :D

You ladies are BAD!

bad, bad, bad.... *sigh* ;)

hey Jane, Where in Sac can I see your famous lap dancing-lol

Private session!
 

KASPAR T. HOWE
U.S. AIR FORCE
20/M/Cali..................Sir, to be honest it's kind of a "Saleen" thing...

"Power in the hands of few".....
;)

You can't miss me..Look for the White 98' Stang with the "Jane of all Trades" plate frame...:D

See you around....

Jenn

Re: LOL
 

I just have one thing to say guys .... ROADDDDDD TRIPPPPPPPP !!
*HotRoddin loads trunk with bandages for trip to hospital* :p :D :D :D :D ;)

Re: Private session!
 

OHHH!!! SLAM! :eek:

And to make sure you can find me...
 

Look for THIS white Stang....

Being a bartender I see this stuff every night. 9 out of 10 women forget about their b/f's and marriages after they get good and buzzed. (and vice versa for men.) Sometimes I wish I never was a bartender so I didn't know that fact. :(

Re: Re: LOL
 

Umm one problem... I'm in Chicago and she's in Cali :p

so about that gixxer, do you ride alot? you prefer cruising around town or getting your knee down on some back roads?

I used to have a 1987 GSXR 1100
I've tried out a buddy's 85 750, an 89 750 and also a 01 GSXR 1000, That thing was a rocket. I can't wait till I can afford another Kevorkian

Later

Conrad

Not a whole lot of twisties around Chicago, too much traffic. I've taken it to the track for some kneedraggin', but mainly just ride, do a wheelie now and then... lol... Just love to take it out on the tollway and ride... or in the summertime down on the lake... :p

excellent

one of the guys I used to ride with could wheelie through 4 gears and set the front down at about 120 mph.

not to scare you or anything but a buddy of mine that HAD a 2000 gsxr 600 just got out of the hospital. It was the last ride of the season on a Sunday afternoon. He came to rest against a telephone pole and was in intensive car for a week and then recovery for another week. He's a crazy bastard and will probably get another bike.


Conrad

Funny Conrad!
 

Hey Conrad,

I never really took much notice of your avatar. Man...That squirrel has a serious set of Nads....ROFL...

Nice car.


Jenn

Re: Funny Conrad!
 

Glad you like it:D

if you think his are big.......;)

Yes, I see people go down every year. Some make it, some don't. :( I've taken a few falls myself, but I look at it as it can happen in anything that you do. There are a lot more car accidents each year with fatalities, than motorcycle. Just gotta put it out of your head, hit the throttle, and ryde it! :p I hate hearing stories like that, yet I see atleast one of my friends get killed each year like that. It's the chance you take I guess.

Jenn, oh girl I know you did not just use the word "Nads". haha

That's one of the best responses to the "You're gonna die" line I've heard in a very long time. Just thought I'd point that out.

Isn't it funny how free some people feel to tell you you need to sell your bike? I have a lot of these "caring" friends, and I can't freaking stand it. Note to self, Get new friends.

I wasn't saying she was gonna die or she should sell her bike.

I wish I could afford another bike, I'd have one in a second. I've been down too and I'll be right back on one as soon as I can.

There are two kinds of riders, those that have been down and those that are going down. Looks like myself and Jill are in the clear now:D

Hehe, me too.

http://deephousepage.com/smilies/knuddel.gif



Take care,
~Chris

i haven't had that happen in awhile :mad: