Girls, Girls, Girls..........
 

So I figure I am pretty much opening up myself to a world of hurt on this one but here goes.

Why is it so much easier to talk to girls you aren't that interested in? I was at a wedding on Sunday (great place to cruise for chicks) and was hitting it up with one of the girls there. I defiantly had the A-game working on that one. I had to leave early because I went with family, but I'm going to see her this week anyway, like I said, A-game.;)

However, there is this girl I'm friends with that totally rocks my world. Well, not like that.:D I just can't figure out how to string enough words together to make a sentence when I'm around her. Totally confusing.:confused:

Is it just me, or do other people out there face the same dilemma? Is there a cure for this, or I am I going to die a bitter lonely man with and get buried in my Cobra?

It's weird... in my job (bartender) I get to talk to lots of gorgeous women all the time, I can talk about anything with them. But get me outside of work, and I'm the same way... it's weird! I am getting better though, not having such a hard time stringing words together!! LOL
Good luck!

Dude i know how you feel I used to be the same way. I could talk to any chick there was except for the ones that I liked. Then one day i just decied that it was stupid to be nervous. I will never know if i just don't go right out and ask. So know these days I just come righ on out and say how i feel. Cuz i got tired of loosing girls cuz i didn't have the guts to tell the girls i really liked how i feel. It alll comes down to just sacking up and spiting it out if you ask me. YOu will get over being nervous faster that way. The longer you wiat the worse it is.

Man, I thought it was going to be a Motley Crue question.

I don't know the answer, but the dilema definately exists. I have found being honest is what works best for me. It doesn't always work, but I never have to think back over what I may have said. Practice helps, too. When I worked at a hospital, I was intermingling with alot of good looking nurses, every day. After a while, it became routine. It also became fake, but that seemed like the way it worked ten years ago. These days, I'm much happier tripping over my own tongue but being honest, than BSing my way through a conversation smoothly. That's just me, though.

That didn't help much, did it? Sorry.

:)

Take care,
-Chris

Just get married. Then you can talk to who ever you want without any problems. Of course this is a catch 22, how do you get married if you can't talk to girls in the first place :confused:

Sorry, don't have an answer, I guess I just lucked out :)

Ya, gr8t, nice advise-lol

Well, I have a similar problem but it's not exactly the same. I can talk to any girl, that's not the problem.... it's breaking the ice that's extreamly hard for me. I just can't seam to say "hi". That's another reason why I don't go clubbing. :rolleyes: Either she needs to start the conversation, or I need to be introduced to her. After that, it's all good ;) That's how my GF and I met. I was introduced to her by a friend of mine, and the rest is history. Good luck man.

Keep this in mind... if you try to talk to her, and she blows you off, it's HER loss! :cool:

I have no problem talking to girls, if I have something to talk about. My problem is breaking the ice with something worth while to talk about. I'm not one of those ppl who try to get a good pickup line, and use it. I like caual talk. But, as u can tell, it's not working for me because I never can tell women my true feelings, and I think tis is why I've been single for over 4 years. Yes, not one Gf since I was 16, maybe the car addiction drove them off?:( :p

What's your name?
 

Why is it so much easier to talk to girls you aren't that interested in? ... there is this girl I'm friends with that totally rocks my world. I just can't figure out how to string enough words together to make a sentence when I'm around her. Totally confusing. - The Deuce

If you're attracted - physically and/or emotionally to a girl - then that very attraction will color your attitude and responses to her. You care what she thinks of you and how you appear to her. Does she think you're cool - or dork city?

On the other hand, if a girl is just a casual friend and you don't feel attracted or especially interested in her sexually or emotionally then your guard is down and you'll have no real concerns about impressing her.

Hormones and simple social conditioning all contribute to this weird situation of being comfortable around the opposite sex until you're attracted to a girl, then getting tongue-tied.

Experience helps and I found that when I was single, simple attraction and desire helped me to overcome whatever was holding me back and I was able to talk to girls that I really wanted to get to know.

Not always successfully of course but the basic desire to get closer to someone you find attractive and/or interesting usually overcomes initial shyness or the huge blank spot that appears where your mind used to be whenever a pretty girl comes along that interests you.

Keep trying and start casually. Don't think about 'lines' and how cool you can be, just chat about something simple for a minute and don't try so hard. It gets easier, eventually.

Thanks for the advice Mr 5 0-

I can make small talk with her, and we do have a lot in common. It is the weirdest thing, because I know I would be pretty good friends with her if she was a dude, because of all the common intersts.

But that's the point. She's hot. Add to that the fact that she is really shy, and gets hit on by random guys pretty much anywhere she goes, it sort of puts me between a rock and well.........;)

So I am going to see her tonight, in a big group with other mutual friends. I'm planning on asking her out for coffee or something fairly light like that. I am friends with her roomate too, which helps some. I need to ask her if she's seeing somebody. My only concern is that she was learning to surf from another friend (USMC Sniper:eek: ), who shipped out last week. I really don't want to get on that guys bad side, if you know what I mean.

I'll let y'all know what happens.

I have no problem talking to anyone. When I'm having a conversation with you and I'm likin' it, I don't give a hoot WHAT you look like :) I just like to find people with common interests and blab away. Even when I was single, I just chatted aimlessly. If you liked me, GREAT! If not, no skin off my back :D I am who I am!

Okay. I guess the time has come.

I will reveal the SECRET to these great questions. The answer to women is ... is ... uh... internet....... signal..... fading... ah, ....th...answ... is..... fading....interne.....is...can't... typ...word.....is................

.......*signal lost*

Okay. Sorry for screwin around on that last post. :D.

Hey, man, I understand your pain. I'm getting much better at dealing with this problem. I guess, the thought of what I could lose (and how much I love women) outweighs the fear of rejection or approaching and conversation. Seems like the older I get, the less time I have for crap like being nervous around women (or so I tell myself, hey and it's helping). Okay, I'll disclose no more. Bye bye now.

*wipes away tear* :D I did miss your humor, Fox! hehehehehe

:D

So I am a big wuss. I talked to her for quite a while tonight, but never got around to asking her out. All things considered I am moving in the right direction, and I do have a good excuse to ask her out this weekend. The only time I ever see her is with groups of people, we never hang out just to hang out. I figure thats reason enough for me.

I guess I'm just trying to not kick myself for wussing out tonight.

Wuss.

Actually, the better friends you become, the less likely it's going to be to work, unless she just has to have you.

:)

Take care,
-Chris

You could always call her up on the phone and ask her out, it's easier when you're not face to face. Keep in mind though that if she's not interested it could ruin the friendship or make things uncomfortable between you and her and the rest of the circle of friends. But then if she is interested, then you're good. ;) My husband and I worked together and I could hardly get the nerve to talk to him. A friend actually told him I was interested in him and well the rest is history. We've been married for 14 years. Good luck with everything. :) C-ya, Melisa

Girls are weird man.....just be carefull. Like Chris said, the better friends you become the less likely it will work out, you'll be gettin the " I dont wanna ruin our friendship" excuse

Brad

Yeah, friendship status is BAD!!!! :( Once you reach that point, it's all over...

Or even worse than that..."But you're like a brother to me!" I HATE THAT ONE!!!

Heh I don't have much of a problem talking to most women. Right now I'm in an akward position. My ex-fiance and her boyfriend just split up and she wants me back. That's not too bad. I can handle that. Not getting back with her no matter what she wants but...the interesting part is that her best friend and I are trying to get together. They live together and my ex gets way pissed and jealous if I talk to her friend. Not the best situation. Normally I would just say screw it, it's not worth it but her and I can talk for hours which is something I can't do with most people. It's a damn attractive feature in a woman. Anyways enough about that. I'm supposed to hook up with them both tonite so I'm going to start thinking about how I'm going to do this.

OH MY DEAR LORD

Do you know how many sisters I have..... I Giant redwood couldnt hold all the members of my family tree if thats the case...

:( Girls are scary, unpredictable, and have KOOTIES! :eek:

Stay away from them to avoid the incredible danger of monthly mood swings, whining, nagging, and foot stamping.

And under NO circumstances tell them they "look fat in that dress", or that their best friend is cute, for risk of severe reprecussions!

BOTTOM LINE: Handle with EXTREME caution!!! ;) :D






oh yeah, and make sure to get your kootie shot ;)

Oh, so your the one that stole the instructions to every woman? :D :p

:D HA!. Hey, I feel like I got cheated on that instruction manual you gave belle. Did you sabbotage it? Those are all the "Don'ts". What happened to the "Do's" section of the manual? :D (j/k)

Hey, I just got a rock solid idea to this dilema. You know what we should do guys, we should not ask out any women from now on. YEAH!!! :mad: MAKE THEM COME TO US!! And when one does, tell them you see them as a sister. ;) That'll fix 'em!

*Fox pats himself on the back for thinking up such a great idea*

ummm, I'm thinking your going to be the only one on that idea :rolleyes:

'belle, that's some of the best advice I seen you give in a very long time! LOL.

;)

Take care,
-Chris

Hey, a family that plays together, stays together.

;)

Take care,
-Chris

Who are ya kiddin' Chris ;) All my advice is superb, excellent, and the final word! (Lesson #4356: never tell a woman she is wrong!)

:D

Now that seems like a problem I'd rather have.:D

Yes dear.

:)

Take care,
-Chris

AMEN!

Where is the lessons 1-4355??? where can I pick up this manual?!?:confused:

Women hate non-confident men, you have a great since of humor Mike and you are not all the bad looking!!! So just say what is on your mind and get it over with, then you will know.

My boyfriend now asked me out for about three months straight until I said yes!! :eek: Well, he is a client of mine and that would not be good for work, so I procrastinated a little. But saying yes was the best thing I ever did!! :D He takes good care of me, even though he just left me for two weeks to go fishing in Alaska. :(

Bottom line, treat it like you would buying a car, if the dealer is asking to much or the car starts sputtering on the test drive. Walk away there are a million (maybe a few less) more just like it waiting for someone like you to come along. Not saying that men own women but......OH you get the general drift!!! LOL :D

Shelby
(sun burned at the Mustang Round-up this weekend and still working hard)

PS I shot four cars today for the magazine and there is supposed to be over 1,700 cars tomorrow!! Man, long weekend!!!

Oh no. You didn't fall for that old excuse, did you???

;)

Take care,
-Chris

Well we will see how long his fish stories are when he gets back !! LOL :D

Thanks for the good word Shelby.:D
At least I think it was a compliment.;)

I did formulate a new plan, after talking to an old friend who is much wiser than I. I figure I am going to attempt to get to know her. Pretty outrageous idea, eh?

I know everybody says stay away from the friend territory, but when somebody is shell shocked from random people hitting on them, this seems like the way to go. I mean, I've seen it happen to her, and I don't want to fall into that category.

By the way, I'm stoked because I found an ideal car today. Check out my other thread, I'll tell everybody about it.:D

Man sometimes girls are nothing but trouble :D

I guess the problem i have is that although i have no problem talking to any woman....if they don't show very much interest i get bored and walk away or if they don't say enough. I hate talking AT people. It's easy to talk AT someone, but it bores the hell out of me!
That's my disfunction

How do u know when to be confident, and when u might be too confident???