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Old 07-17-2002, 12:08 PM   #9
Mr 5 0
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Join Date: May 1997
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Why is it so much easier to talk to girls you aren't that interested in? ... there is this girl I'm friends with that totally rocks my world. I just can't figure out how to string enough words together to make a sentence when I'm around her. Totally confusing. - The Deuce

If you're attracted - physically and/or emotionally to a girl - then that very attraction will color your attitude and responses to her. You care what she thinks of you and how you appear to her. Does she think you're cool - or dork city?

On the other hand, if a girl is just a casual friend and you don't feel attracted or especially interested in her sexually or emotionally then your guard is down and you'll have no real concerns about impressing her.

Hormones and simple social conditioning all contribute to this weird situation of being comfortable around the opposite sex until you're attracted to a girl, then getting tongue-tied.

Experience helps and I found that when I was single, simple attraction and desire helped me to overcome whatever was holding me back and I was able to talk to girls that I really wanted to get to know.

Not always successfully of course but the basic desire to get closer to someone you find attractive and/or interesting usually overcomes initial shyness or the huge blank spot that appears where your mind used to be whenever a pretty girl comes along that interests you.

Keep trying and start casually. Don't think about 'lines' and how cool you can be, just chat about something simple for a minute and don't try so hard. It gets easier, eventually.
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