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Old 07-24-2002, 06:55 PM   #1
PKRWUD
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Talking 15 Things Not To Say To A Cop

15 Things Not To Say To A Cop

1 I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

2 Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3 Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4 Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good job!

5 Excuse me. Is "stick up" hyphenated?

6 I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

7 I was going to be a trooper, but I decided to finish high school instead.

8 Bad cop! No donut!

9 You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

10 Is it true that people become troopers because they are too dumb to work at McDonald's?

11 I pay your salary!

12 Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

13 Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

14 What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained specialist.

15 Hey, is that a 9 mm? How's that compare to this one here?


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Old 07-24-2002, 07:51 PM   #2
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lol, I love any joke involving Pork
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Old 07-24-2002, 07:52 PM   #3
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ROTFLMAO!!!

You forgot this one...

Officer: You eyes look red son. Have you been drinking?

Motorist Your eyes look glazed sir. Have you been eating donuts?
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Old 07-24-2002, 08:21 PM   #4
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You forgot what i did after i seen the game preview. And i think this was why i got my ticket for loud exhaust.

Policeo you know why i pulled you over.

Stupid Me:Cause you think i have donuts in here.

Man that cost me $75.
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Old 07-24-2002, 08:22 PM   #5
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funny thing is, Chris HAS used those line himself! HAHA!
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Old 07-24-2002, 09:06 PM   #6
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lmao, that is some funny stuff. i gotta tell my friend these, him being a cop and all.
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Old 07-24-2002, 09:07 PM   #7
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So what's your problem here?

Rev
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Old 07-24-2002, 09:13 PM   #8
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I have heard this one while on duty.

Me: You know you were going pretty fast. What is your hurry?

Him: At that speed officer it is smarter to keep my eye on the road, not my speedo.

I just cracked up, told them to slow down, and walked away laughing my *** off.
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Old 07-24-2002, 10:34 PM   #9
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lol that is hillarious Chris.
blackfang, I think I'll use that one next time. hehe....

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Old 07-24-2002, 10:39 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by blackfang
I have heard this one while on duty.

Me: You know you were going pretty fast. What is your hurry?

Him: At that speed officer it is smarter to keep my eye on the road, not my speedo.

I just cracked up, told them to slow down, and walked away laughing my *** off.
how fast was he going? got to admit, that is one unique answer!
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Old 07-24-2002, 11:02 PM   #11
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me and a friend(<--driver) of mine got pulled over by a cop this one night and it was dark so the cop walked up to the window with flashlight in hand. The cop asked "do you know why i pulled you over", while shinning the light in Shauns face. Being the hard *** he is, grabbed his flashlight shined it in the officers face saying "Could it be that i was speeding". He got a ticket for speeding but the cop didnt say anything about Shaun's smartass remark. I just looked out the window away from shaun and the cop to hide my laughing.
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Old 07-24-2002, 11:27 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by srv1
funny thing is, Chris HAS used those line himself! HAHA!
And your point is????



Actually, one of my dumbest remarks to a cop was when I got my 2nd DUI (back in the late 80's when I was still invincible and knew everything). He asked me to do some balancing act/sobriety check, to which I replied "Hell, I can't even do that when I'm sober!".

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Old 07-26-2002, 08:03 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by blackfang
I have heard this one while on duty.

Me: You know you were going pretty fast. What is your hurry?

Him: At that speed officer it is smarter to keep my eye on the road, not my speedo.

I just cracked up, told them to slow down, and walked away laughing my *** off.
So does that still work?!?
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Old 07-26-2002, 08:29 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by OnMy3rdStang
me and a friend(<--driver) of mine got pulled over by a cop this one night and it was dark so the cop walked up to the window with flashlight in hand. The cop asked "do you know why i pulled you over", while shinning the light in Shauns face. Being the hard *** he is, grabbed his flashlight shined it in the officers face saying "Could it be that i was speeding". He got a ticket for speeding but the cop didnt say anything about Shaun's smartass remark. I just looked out the window away from shaun and the cop to hide my laughing.
Dude, LOL, I would've cracked up. That's the best! He's lucky. though, that the cop didn't think he was reaching for a gun when he pulled out his flashlight. ....the story would've ended a little differently then... heh, heh.
Quote:
Originally posted by PKRWUD
Actually, one of my dumbest remarks to a cop was when I got my 2nd DUI (back in the late 80's when I was still invincible and knew everything). He asked me to do some balancing act/sobriety check, to which I replied "Hell, I can't even do that when I'm sober!".
ROFL.
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