Well After 3 yrs 11 Months Looks like I'm Single Again.

Mercury · 10-15-2001, 11:43 PM

Well me and my Girlfriend of 3 years and 11 months seemed to have grown apart or something.

We havent talked for 5 days, no e-mails no nothing. We argued and she said something that really hurt my feelings.

Me and her have done nothing but argue for the last 10 months. Seemed like things werent going to get any better. But over the last few weeks things seemed to be getting better. We seemed to be a little more understanding of one another, THEN BLAM.

Another Fight. I've had it with fighting. What good is a relationship if you get in a fight every week.

I really miss her though, and Love her. But things just dont seem to mesh well with us anymore.

I wish I understood it, that is Life and Love, but no one does. I keep telling my self "Things will change" and I try, but they never change.

She doesnt trust me one bit. I have never cheated on anyone. Never will. When ever she doesnt want to hear something, she automatically acuses me of lying. I just dont have the energy anymore to fight it and keep us together.

Some of you all might remember how I had alot of problems with my relationship a while back. I think I'm going to take most of you alls advice and just let things go and walk away.

Although I'll be walking away sobbing.

Most of you all might not care, but it was just something I needed to get off my chest. Though I dont feel one bit better.

Unit 5302 · 10-16-2001, 12:13 AM

Where's that Fed Ex chick when you need her man???

Sorry to hear about that Merc. I remember your posts before, I've never been through any long relationships, but I sure have fallen hard before.

There is a girl I'm crazy about right now, but the complications surrounding the whole thing are insane. Still, it's a case where I've fallen hard, and I definately try. I'm pretty sure I will continue to try my *** off because I think she's worth every bit of effort should I somehow actually be able to make something work. Who knows? My gut feeling is I'm gonna get crushed hard core on this one. It's always uncertain. Kind of a roller coaster for me. Pretty wild ride too. Sometimes I feel down, like there just isn't a chance and that I should protect myself and put some distance on. But how can I when she can make my whole day without even trying? It's like BOOM!! Sun came out. Stupid, I know, but the kind of happy she makes me is damn hard to come by. That and she's gorgeous and smart, you know, rounds it all out with a personality I love. Heh, I'm screwed.

Gotta take the chance, though. If the chance doesn't work out, you've gotta let go and move on, which is where you are at. If it does, you're way better off then when you took it.

It's really hilarious to me sometimes. Everybody I know comes to me for advice, and I'm the loner of all my friends. Always have been. I think for the most part I'm right when I give it, but I never ever follow my own advice, LOL.

Best of luck to you, but if I'm right, (who wants to argue with Unit 5302?) you're making the right call. Hmmm.... prediction Mercury isn't lonely for long, knowing your family anyway!!!

#1 Pony · 10-16-2001, 12:13 AM

I care. It's a hard thing to do (walk away), when you really love them. Sadly it happens to the best of us. Be strong.

bigwhitecobra · 10-16-2001, 12:15 AM

If there is a bright side to it, atleast you have the ability to understand when it's over. Some people go their entire lives hung up on "the one that got away."

You have what 75% of the American population wants, "closure". Let it be. If she wants you back some day, then maybe it was meant to be. Until then, live your life. You're only 24(?). There's more fish in the sea, some a little bigger than others, and some that look the same as the one you threw back.

Uh....sorry, I forgot what I was going to say there. Just make yourself happy and the rest will come naturally. Later man.

Topless In Texas · 10-16-2001, 12:28 AM

Hey MERC!!
I've sent you a few emails over the last few weeks, and they keep getting sent back to me saying your box is full!!!

I'm sorry to hear that it finally is over. But, I know you will do what you feel you need to do. And, It doesn't necessarily mean FOREVER!!! Just for now, if need be.

It's so easy to tell someone to keep yur 'chin up', but it's so hard to do!!!

Clear out your inbox, and I'll email you later this week. I gotta go to bed now. Trying to turn over that 'new leaf'!!! (not stay up all night on the p.c.!) G'nite, and Take Care..... Topless

------------------
1994 GT CONVERTIBLE
TOPLESS IN TEXAS Girls can too's July "Mare of the Month"

Performance Red. Cold Air Ind.,K&N,H.P. Pulleys,OffRoad H-Pipe,Subframe Connectors,Flows,3.55,Light bar,Custom HeadRests.Lotta Chrome

Mercury · 10-16-2001, 01:09 AM

I appreciate the words of encouragment and wisdom friends.

Its really hard to put into words how I feel at the moment. Words can do no justice to the plethora of emotions and the magnitude of them.

At least I have my cars, and my artwork to keep me occupied during my time away from work. But all Drawing and painting seem to do is make me more aware of my feelings.

And if I take my telescope out and look at the stars it does the same thing, plus makes me feel even more lonley.

I dont want to walk away, God knows, but I have exhausted all of my energy and effort.

You know what, Hearing Enya Music countless times on CNN doesnt help either, thats for damn sure. The music is beautifull, but I'll be damned if it isnt depressing.

This is the first time ever in my 24 year life that I havent felt ready to start dating the second I broke up with someone. All I feel is this hollowness, this emptiness thats so utter and deep. Guess its time to start writting on my story again.

Something else I think alot of is how I changed her life, and hope that she doesnt feel the way I do now. I know that sounds rather arrogant of me to assume I had that impact on anyone, but our relationship was.......a really close one. Something niether of us had experienced before. I want her to be happy. I hate hurting people, I dont mind bringing pain and hurt on myself so much.

Either way, if we meet again, or go our seperate ways never to cross paths again, I wish her a happy life.

UNIT. As for the Fed Ex girl I talked about this summer, she went back to college. Her last day was the last day of August if I remember correctly. Her brother in law (Whos a driver for us) tells me she says Hi, and asks how I'm doing.

Right now though, I dont feel like seeing anyone else. I'll probably feel that way for a while. The only thing I want to get into is my car, and drive.

Looks like my cars are my life again.

Topless, I still cant really do much with my email. I'm using my sisters computer and cant save my crap to her drive. My computer is still toast. That sould change after Wednseday though.

PKRWUD · 10-16-2001, 01:12 AM

Women... You can't live with them, and you can't kill them.

reading your post brought back some real memories. That sucked. I am very single now, and very content. It took some time to get here, though. You WILL survive. Believe it or not, you really will look back on this someday and feel funny for being so concerned. hang in there, though. The best is yet to come.

~C

------------------
Retired Moderator
MustangNet

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joe4speed · 10-16-2001, 01:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Unit 5302:

There is a girl I'm crazy about right now, but the complications surrounding the whole thing are insane. Still, it's a case where I've fallen hard, and I definately try. I'm pretty sure I will continue to try my *** off because I think she's worth every bit of effort should I somehow actually be able to make something work. Who knows? My gut feeling is I'm gonna get crushed hard core on this one. It's always uncertain. Kind of a roller coaster for me. Pretty wild ride too. Sometimes I feel down, like there just isn't a chance and that I should protect myself and put some distance on. But how can I when she can make my whole day without even trying? It's like BOOM!! Sun came out. Stupid, I know, but the kind of happy she makes me is damn hard to come by. That and she's gorgeous and smart, you know, rounds it all out with a personality I love. Heh, I'm screwed.

Wow, you just summed up my situation there!! Weird...

Good luck, Merc, I know how it can be!

------------------
Joe! 1988 GT, 167,000 miles!!! 13.58@105mph Check out my listing! Click here! Or my website:www.joe4speed.com
99 Ninja ZX-6R:10.32@135mph!
1993 Olds Eighty Eight LSS 16.40@88.8mph

Mach 1 · 10-16-2001, 03:45 AM

dont fight it. Its eithier meant to be or its not. good luck

Coupe Devil · 10-16-2001, 08:32 AM

I know how you feel man. For two years I lived my life for someone else. That doesnt sound like such a big deal but the problem was we weren't together. I realized after much deliberation and pure emotional HELL that we would never be together. We are still freinds and much better of now that all the mess is over with. She knew how I felt but she was to afraid to commit. Kinda weird her being a woman and all. I realized after it was all over that I hadn't done anything and had kept her from doing alot of the things she wanted. I know live my life for me and only me. Sure that may change if the girls that works in the law office next door keeps lookin that good, but for know it's work, buildin drag cars, doin smokey burnouts, and hangin out with the freinds and fellow mustang lovers.

------------------
'93 lx notch 4 banger (drive it to work currently), Using the 306, 8.8 posi, 4.10's, summit rear cover, elec. fan, cowl hood, wieand stealth intake, holley 650 d.p.carb., built c-4, e-303, full autometer guages, msd box, mallory unilite dist, and coil, roll cage, summit seat, subs, 15x10's in the back with slicks, skinnies up front, all in use for 1988 Hatch Drag Car. Hope to start running next year. Hoping for 7.20's after all is done with small motor.

Capri306 · 10-16-2001, 09:39 AM

Merc: sounds pretty normal the way you feel right now. I know it's hard to put into words, but having dealt with 2 such relationships in the past, I can only tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel, my friend. I'll give you a tip, though. Stay away from the art, the music, perfumes, city parks, etc. All of this will only serve to bring up memories, and I know after this kind of relationship that's the worst. After a while (it was almost a YEAR for me), you'll feel a lot better. When you think of her, you won't think, "God, what the hell went wrong? What did I do?" You'll think, "ha, I'm a lot better off now than I was then. I'm not fighting constantly, and I don't have to work so hard to be happy." Okay, mebbe that's not the exact words, but you get the idea. You won't hate her right away. You say you still love her now, but believe me bud, that's the fuel to your fire. The love I had for someone just ate me alive afterwards, like what's happening to you. That numb, mindless feeling is only temporary. The best cure for all of this? Get out with friends. Go out and don't bemoan your loss. You're a single guy now, man!!! Get out there and enjoy it!!!

Trust me, in a little while, you'll be back in the groove. Get through this hard time by just letting her go, and let love do its work to find you again. Good luck, Merc.

------------------
Capri306, Moderator, The Mustang Works Online

"PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN!!!"

10-16-2001, 10:41 AM

There is a song called "It's not love" by Dokken, you should check it out.

I think I told you what I thought last time, I've been going through the same thing for over 7 yrs. I won't go into all the horrid details though.

You should go out and hit some baseballs, go to a driving range, go bowling.. go places you don't normally go. You will be surprised at what you find. The first couple of times it may suck, but after that you will realize just what is out there. When you finally do find another girl and you couldn't care less about the old one(it will happen), don't let the old one back in(what I did). I won't go into those details either(heh). Good luck (too bad I can't follow my own advice

)

------------------
Rick
My 89lx(updated 7/20/2001)

302 LX Eric · 10-16-2001, 11:01 AM

Hey man, don't feel bad. Just remember that old saying:

"If it's got tits or tires, sooner or later it will give you problems."

Just joking around - trying to lighten up the situation. Good luck with everything, I'm sure it will all turn out well soon.

Take care,
Eric

PKRWUD · 10-16-2001, 11:18 AM

After taking Ricks excellent advice, listen to track 11 on Extreme's Pornograffitti album. It's become my mantra.

~C

Stang_Crazy · 10-16-2001, 05:31 PM

Mercury:

I was in a similar situation as you are (my relationship was 2 years). Just think about what YOU want. After all, you should have a little more free time now to think about things.

Seriously, It's REALLY hard to live without someone that could make you feel so complete but it can be done. Just give things some time and let your head clear before you finally decide what you want to do. Good Luck and take care.

------------------
89 GT 5-speed: Dynomax Cat-Back, Dynomax H-pipe w/cats, Pro 5.0
Waiting for install: ASP Pulleys, Densecharger

Fox Body · 10-16-2001, 06:08 PM

Mercury, sorry bout this happening to you, man. I haven't gone throught exactly what you are talking about but a close friend of mine just went through EXACTLY what you've gone through-- same feelings b4 and after.

It's weird and twisted man. Sometimes I get irritated and frustrated many times by how women can have such an effect on us guys. But to be honest, I personally don't think I could stand this place if there were no women around. Just like that saying, "Women, can't live with them, can't live without them" (or the other saying according to PKRWUD

)

NO DOUBT man, this is easier said than done, but it's good when you know when to let go. And of course, there is no way the way you feel about her will suddenly change tomorrow morning when you wake up, but give it time and BE PATIENT FOR THE ONE WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WITH.

I know you love her. That is not hard to believe, butMerc, you guys are not married. Too many times people feel that if they're in a relationship, they GOTTA make it last until death. Now when you get married, that's when you have that obligation (although some may not feel the same way I do).

Find solace in the people here at MW, your friends where you live, your family (no matter how weird they are

), you car, work, whatever. Women are not the only good thing in this world (even though I love them all to death

) and you will find the right girl soon. Be strong and patient and Godspeed to ya. We care about you dude.

-----------------------------------------
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6T9PONY · 10-16-2001, 07:48 PM

Like many others have said: Time. Time is what you need. You can't help how you feel. If you do still love her or not, you can't help that. So just don't worry about your feelings. They will take care of themselves. It's time that will help you and get you through all this. Time is a very hard thing to wait for though.

Time is the best and worst thing in the world for people in your situation. But it's the only thing.

------------------
Previously "BennyBoy"
'69 Coupe with 351W-I rolled it 8/8
Edelbrock RPM intake, Edelbrock RPM cam, Edelbrock 750 cfm carb, Hedman headers, 2 1/2" pipe, glasspacks, C4: shift kit, 9" Currie: Trac-Lok 3.70s, 290hp-stock heads

Starting Project "2ND COMING": 1969 Fastback

[This message has been edited by 6T9PONY (edited 10-16-2001).]

Mercury · 10-16-2001, 11:19 PM

What makes things so difficult, is that I thought she was going to be the women I asked to marry me. I thought she was the One for me. Guess not though

Who knows, maybe I'll meet a girl thats as into cars and racing as much as I am. And is as goofy and off the wall as I am. And into Fords like I am. Maybe.....One day. Well hell, I can at least dream cant I.

Well, at least I have everything a man needs. A cupboard full of Oodles of Noodles, a 12 pack of Miller in the fridge, and a computer. (To talk to my Mustang Friends)

Maybe one day I'll bump into some one like me, who loves me for what I am, and what I do. I'm just blabbering now.

Coupe Devil · 10-16-2001, 11:39 PM

Dude if you ever find this girl you speak so highly of find out if she has a sister and send her my way. I know ONE, SINGLUAR, UNO girl that is like that but she is "Spoken for currently" But the day she is set free by boywonder (Thats what I call him anyways because I have see nthe guy and its a ******* miracle he got this girl) i'm gonna be on it like stink on **** .

------------------
'93 lx notch 4 banger (drive it to work currently), Using the 306, 8.8 posi, 4.10's, summit rear cover, elec. fan, cowl hood, wieand stealth intake, holley 650 d.p.carb., built c-4, e-303, full autometer guages, msd box, mallory unilite dist, and coil, roll cage, summit seat, subs, 15x10's in the back with slicks, skinnies up front, all in use for 1988 Hatch Drag Car. Hope to start running next year. Hoping for 7.20's after all is done with small motor.

2FastLX · 10-17-2001, 02:52 AM

I remeber the previous posts Merc. I felt for you then and I feel for you now. Friends can give you advice, but not a soul on Earth is going to know exactly what you are feeling and dealing with. You probably feel that way (I did). I've been through a break up after 3 long years myself and can say it was right up there with my Father's death as one of the worst things I've ever gone through. I thought I had lost the only love I'd ever know and was depressed forever it seemed. Even through two or three other relationships I still felt this way. But, I have since met my wife and am very happy I stuck it out through the bad times to be living the "good" life now. One thing though that has changed - I can honestly say a woman will never hurt me like that again. I don't know if it's the fact that I still miss her and still love her, or if it's something I have learned from this telling me I'll be all right. Whatever it is I am stronger now. You will be too. Life only gets better man.

------------------
Gunning for 12's!

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10-15-2001, 11:43 PM	#1
Mercury The Redneck James Bond Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Fayetteville NC Posts: 1,707	Well After 3 yrs 11 Months Looks like I'm Single Again. Well me and my Girlfriend of 3 years and 11 months seemed to have grown apart or something. We havent talked for 5 days, no e-mails no nothing. We argued and she said something that really hurt my feelings. Me and her have done nothing but argue for the last 10 months. Seemed like things werent going to get any better. But over the last few weeks things seemed to be getting better. We seemed to be a little more understanding of one another, THEN BLAM. Another Fight. I've had it with fighting. What good is a relationship if you get in a fight every week. I really miss her though, and Love her. But things just dont seem to mesh well with us anymore. I wish I understood it, that is Life and Love, but no one does. I keep telling my self "Things will change" and I try, but they never change. She doesnt trust me one bit. I have never cheated on anyone. Never will. When ever she doesnt want to hear something, she automatically acuses me of lying. I just dont have the energy anymore to fight it and keep us together. Some of you all might remember how I had alot of problems with my relationship a while back. I think I'm going to take most of you alls advice and just let things go and walk away. Although I'll be walking away sobbing. Most of you all might not care, but it was just something I needed to get off my chest. Though I dont feel one bit better.

10-16-2001, 12:13 AM	#2
Unit 5302 Registered Member Join Date: May 1999 Posts: 5,246	Where's that Fed Ex chick when you need her man??? Sorry to hear about that Merc. I remember your posts before, I've never been through any long relationships, but I sure have fallen hard before. There is a girl I'm crazy about right now, but the complications surrounding the whole thing are insane. Still, it's a case where I've fallen hard, and I definately try. I'm pretty sure I will continue to try my * off because I think she's worth every bit of effort should I somehow actually be able to make something work. Who knows? My gut feeling is I'm gonna get crushed hard core on this one. It's always uncertain. Kind of a roller coaster for me. Pretty wild ride too. Sometimes I feel down, like there just isn't a chance and that I should protect myself and put some distance on. But how can I when she can make my whole day without even trying? It's like BOOM!! Sun came out. Stupid, I know, but the kind of happy she makes me is damn hard to come by. That and she's gorgeous and smart, you know, rounds it all out with a personality I love. Heh, I'm screwed. Gotta take the chance, though. If the chance doesn't work out, you've gotta let go and move on, which is where you are at. If it does, you're way better off then when you took it. It's really hilarious to me sometimes. Everybody I know comes to me for advice, and I'm the loner of all my friends. Always have been. I think for the most part I'm right when I give it, but I never ever follow my own advice, LOL. Best of luck to you, but if I'm right, (who wants to argue with Unit 5302?) you're making the right call. Hmmm.... prediction Mercury** isn't lonely for long, knowing your family anyway!!!

10-16-2001, 12:13 AM	#3
#1 Pony Registered Member Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 268	I care. It's a hard thing to do (walk away), when you really love them. Sadly it happens to the best of us. Be strong.

10-16-2001, 12:15 AM	#4
bigwhitecobra Huh? Whatcha said? Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Fayetteville, NC Posts: 1,073	If there is a bright side to it, atleast you have the ability to understand when it's over. Some people go their entire lives hung up on "the one that got away." You have what 75% of the American population wants, "closure". Let it be. If she wants you back some day, then maybe it was meant to be. Until then, live your life. You're only 24(?). There's more fish in the sea, some a little bigger than others, and some that look the same as the one you threw back. Uh....sorry, I forgot what I was going to say there. Just make yourself happy and the rest will come naturally. Later man.

10-16-2001, 12:28 AM	#5
Topless In Texas Not broken anymore! Join Date: May 2001 Location: La Porte, TEXASS :) Posts: 1,963	Hey MERC!! I've sent you a few emails over the last few weeks, and they keep getting sent back to me saying your box is full!!! I'm sorry to hear that it finally is over. But, I know you will do what you feel you need to do. And, It doesn't necessarily mean FOREVER!!! Just for now, if need be. It's so easy to tell someone to keep yur 'chin up', but it's so hard to do!!! Clear out your inbox, and I'll email you later this week. I gotta go to bed now. Trying to turn over that 'new leaf'!!! (not stay up all night on the p.c.!) G'nite, and Take Care..... Topless ------------------ 1994 GT CONVERTIBLE TOPLESS IN TEXAS Girls can too's July "Mare of the Month" Performance Red. Cold Air Ind.,K&N,H.P. Pulleys,OffRoad H-Pipe,Subframe Connectors,Flows,3.55,Light bar,Custom HeadRests.Lotta Chrome

10-16-2001, 01:09 AM	#6
Mercury The Redneck James Bond Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Fayetteville NC Posts: 1,707	I appreciate the words of encouragment and wisdom friends. Its really hard to put into words how I feel at the moment. Words can do no justice to the plethora of emotions and the magnitude of them. At least I have my cars, and my artwork to keep me occupied during my time away from work. But all Drawing and painting seem to do is make me more aware of my feelings. And if I take my telescope out and look at the stars it does the same thing, plus makes me feel even more lonley. I dont want to walk away, God knows, but I have exhausted all of my energy and effort. You know what, Hearing Enya Music countless times on CNN doesnt help either, thats for damn sure. The music is beautifull, but I'll be damned if it isnt depressing. This is the first time ever in my 24 year life that I havent felt ready to start dating the second I broke up with someone. All I feel is this hollowness, this emptiness thats so utter and deep. Guess its time to start writting on my story again. Something else I think alot of is how I changed her life, and hope that she doesnt feel the way I do now. I know that sounds rather arrogant of me to assume I had that impact on anyone, but our relationship was.......a really close one. Something niether of us had experienced before. I want her to be happy. I hate hurting people, I dont mind bringing pain and hurt on myself so much. Either way, if we meet again, or go our seperate ways never to cross paths again, I wish her a happy life. UNIT. As for the Fed Ex girl I talked about this summer, she went back to college. Her last day was the last day of August if I remember correctly. Her brother in law (Whos a driver for us) tells me she says Hi, and asks how I'm doing. Right now though, I dont feel like seeing anyone else. I'll probably feel that way for a while. The only thing I want to get into is my car, and drive. Looks like my cars are my life again. Topless, I still cant really do much with my email. I'm using my sisters computer and cant save my crap to her drive. My computer is still toast. That sould change after Wednseday though.

10-16-2001, 01:12 AM	#7
PKRWUD Junior Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Ventura, California Posts: 8,981	Women... You can't live with them, and you can't kill them. reading your post brought back some real memories. That sucked. I am very single now, and very content. It took some time to get here, though. You WILL survive. Believe it or not, you really will look back on this someday and feel funny for being so concerned. hang in there, though. The best is yet to come. ~C ------------------ Retired Moderator MustangNet My site: Peckerwoods Pit Stop My teams site: Jim Porter Racing RACECAR spelled backwards is RACECAR HEY !!! Are you ASE Certified ??? If you are, ask me about iATN.

10-16-2001, 03:45 AM	#9
Mach 1 Registered Member Join Date: May 1999 Location: Georgia Posts: 3,866	dont fight it. Its eithier meant to be or its not. good luck

10-16-2001, 08:32 AM	#10
Coupe Devil Moderator Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Myrtle Beach SC Posts: 1,643	I know how you feel man. For two years I lived my life for someone else. That doesnt sound like such a big deal but the problem was we weren't together. I realized after much deliberation and pure emotional HELL that we would never be together. We are still freinds and much better of now that all the mess is over with. She knew how I felt but she was to afraid to commit. Kinda weird her being a woman and all. I realized after it was all over that I hadn't done anything and had kept her from doing alot of the things she wanted. I know live my life for me and only me. Sure that may change if the girls that works in the law office next door keeps lookin that good, but for know it's work, buildin drag cars, doin smokey burnouts, and hangin out with the freinds and fellow mustang lovers. ------------------ '93 lx notch 4 banger (drive it to work currently), Using the 306, 8.8 posi, 4.10's, summit rear cover, elec. fan, cowl hood, wieand stealth intake, holley 650 d.p.carb., built c-4, e-303, full autometer guages, msd box, mallory unilite dist, and coil, roll cage, summit seat, subs, 15x10's in the back with slicks, skinnies up front, all in use for 1988 Hatch Drag Car. Hope to start running next year. Hoping for 7.20's after all is done with small motor.

10-16-2001, 09:39 AM	#11
Capri306 Moderator Join Date: Sep 1998 Location: Grand Rapids, Michigan, USA Posts: 1,001	Merc: sounds pretty normal the way you feel right now. I know it's hard to put into words, but having dealt with 2 such relationships in the past, I can only tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel, my friend. I'll give you a tip, though. Stay away from the art, the music, perfumes, city parks, etc. All of this will only serve to bring up memories, and I know after this kind of relationship that's the worst. After a while (it was almost a YEAR for me), you'll feel a lot better. When you think of her, you won't think, "God, what the hell went wrong? What did I do?" You'll think, "ha, I'm a lot better off now than I was then. I'm not fighting constantly, and I don't have to work so hard to be happy." Okay, mebbe that's not the exact words, but you get the idea. You won't hate her right away. You say you still love her now, but believe me bud, that's the fuel to your fire. The love I had for someone just ate me alive afterwards, like what's happening to you. That numb, mindless feeling is only temporary. The best cure for all of this? Get out with friends. Go out and don't bemoan your loss. You're a single guy now, man!!! Get out there and enjoy it!!! Trust me, in a little while, you'll be back in the groove. Get through this hard time by just letting her go, and let love do its work to find you again. Good luck, Merc. ------------------ Capri306, Moderator, The Mustang Works Online *"PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN!!!"*

10-16-2001, 10:41 AM	#12
rbatson Guest Posts: n/a	There is a song called "It's not love" by Dokken, you should check it out. I think I told you what I thought last time, I've been going through the same thing for over 7 yrs. I won't go into all the horrid details though. You should go out and hit some baseballs, go to a driving range, go bowling.. go places you don't normally go. You will be surprised at what you find. The first couple of times it may suck, but after that you will realize just what is out there. When you finally do find another girl and you couldn't care less about the old one(it will happen), don't let the old one back in(what I did). I won't go into those details either(heh). Good luck (too bad I can't follow my own advice ) ------------------ Rick My 89lx(updated 7/20/2001)

10-16-2001, 11:01 AM	#13
302 LX Eric or '331 LX Eric' Join Date: Jan 1999 Location: Columbus, Ohio Posts: 2,142	Hey man, don't feel bad. Just remember that old saying: "If it's got tits or tires, sooner or later it will give you problems." Just joking around - trying to lighten up the situation. Good luck with everything, I'm sure it will all turn out well soon. Take care, Eric

10-16-2001, 11:18 AM	#14
PKRWUD Junior Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Ventura, California Posts: 8,981	After taking Ricks excellent advice, listen to track 11 on Extreme's Pornograffitti album. It's become my mantra. ~C

10-16-2001, 05:31 PM	#15
Stang_Crazy It's never clean enough! Join Date: Jan 1999 Location: Shaler, PA Posts: 1,542	Mercury: I was in a similar situation as you are (my relationship was 2 years). Just think about what YOU want. After all, you should have a little more free time now to think about things. Seriously, It's REALLY hard to live without someone that could make you feel so complete but it can be done. Just give things some time and let your head clear before you finally decide what you want to do. Good Luck and take care. ------------------ 89 GT 5-speed: Dynomax Cat-Back, Dynomax H-pipe w/cats, Pro 5.0 Waiting for install: ASP Pulleys, Densecharger

10-16-2001, 06:08 PM	#16
Fox Body Mustang Maniac Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: GA, U.S.A Posts: 2,266	Mercury, sorry bout this happening to you, man. I haven't gone throught exactly what you are talking about but a close friend of mine just went through EXACTLY what you've gone through-- same feelings b4 and after. It's weird and twisted man. Sometimes I get irritated and frustrated many times by how women can have such an effect on us guys. But to be honest, I personally don't think I could stand this place if there were no women around. Just like that saying, "Women, can't live with them, can't live without them" (or the other saying according to PKRWUD ) NO DOUBT man, this is easier said than done, but it's good when you know when to let go. And of course, there is no way the way you feel about her will suddenly change tomorrow morning when you wake up, but give it time and BE PATIENT FOR THE ONE WHO YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WITH. I know you love her. That is not hard to believe, butMerc, you guys are not married. Too many times people feel that if they're in a relationship, they GOTTA make it last until death. Now when you get married, that's when you have that obligation (although some may not feel the same way I do). Find solace in the people here at MW, your friends where you live, your family (no matter how weird they are ), you car, work, whatever. Women are not the only good thing in this world (even though I love them all to death ) and you will find the right girl soon. Be strong and patient and Godspeed to ya. We care about you dude. ----------------------------------------- 351W-powered 1979 Ford Mustang notchback Stock 5.8L under custom made 4" cowl, C4 w/ shift kit Holley 750 cfm, Edelbrock Performer RPM intake 1 5/8" MAC shorty headers, Al driveshaft 2.5" Off road H-pipe, 2-chamber Flowmasters Front: 225/60/15, Rear: 255/60/15 Eagle GT II Weld wheels (15x6;15x8), 8.8" Rear w/ 3.55s 14 x 4” K&N air filter. Only a few months b4 Project FOX* begins!!!* "Red, thou art my companion. Hasten now your quickened metamorphosis to Green that I may conquer all who dare abide there beside me. May they be left thither behind burnt black." ---Fox Body

10-16-2001, 07:48 PM	#17
6T9PONY All about the Windsor. Join Date: Feb 2000 Posts: 2,052	Like many others have said: Time. Time is what you need. You can't help how you feel. If you do still love her or not, you can't help that. So just don't worry about your feelings. They will take care of themselves. It's time that will help you and get you through all this. Time is a very hard thing to wait for though. Time is the best and worst thing in the world for people in your situation. But it's the only thing. ------------------ Previously "BennyBoy" '69 Coupe with 351W-I rolled it 8/8 Edelbrock RPM intake, Edelbrock RPM cam, Edelbrock 750 cfm carb, Hedman headers, 2 1/2" pipe, glasspacks, C4: shift kit, 9" Currie: Trac-Lok 3.70s, 290hp-stock heads Starting Project "2ND COMING": 1969 Fastback [This message has been edited by 6T9PONY (edited 10-16-2001).]

10-16-2001, 11:19 PM	#18
Mercury The Redneck James Bond Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Fayetteville NC Posts: 1,707	What makes things so difficult, is that I thought she was going to be the women I asked to marry me. I thought she was the One for me. Guess not though Who knows, maybe I'll meet a girl thats as into cars and racing as much as I am. And is as goofy and off the wall as I am. And into Fords like I am. Maybe.....One day. Well hell, I can at least dream cant I. Well, at least I have everything a man needs. A cupboard full of Oodles of Noodles, a 12 pack of Miller in the fridge, and a computer. (To talk to my Mustang Friends) Maybe one day I'll bump into some one like me, who loves me for what I am, and what I do. I'm just blabbering now.

10-16-2001, 11:39 PM	#19
Coupe Devil Moderator Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Myrtle Beach SC Posts: 1,643	Dude if you ever find this girl you speak so highly of find out if she has a sister and send her my way. I know ONE, SINGLUAR, UNO girl that is like that but she is "Spoken for currently" But the day she is set free by boywonder (Thats what I call him anyways because I have see nthe guy and its a ***** miracle he got this girl) i'm gonna be on it like stink on ** . ------------------ '93 lx notch 4 banger (drive it to work currently), Using the 306, 8.8 posi, 4.10's, summit rear cover, elec. fan, cowl hood, wieand stealth intake, holley 650 d.p.carb., built c-4, e-303, full autometer guages, msd box, mallory unilite dist, and coil, roll cage, summit seat, subs, 15x10's in the back with slicks, skinnies up front, all in use for 1988 Hatch Drag Car. Hope to start running next year. Hoping for 7.20's after all is done with small motor.

10-17-2001, 02:52 AM	#20
2FastLX The Photoshop Guru Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Mecca, Indiana Posts: 1,419	I remeber the previous posts Merc. I felt for you then and I feel for you now. Friends can give you advice, but not a soul on Earth is going to know exactly what you are feeling and dealing with. You probably feel that way (I did). I've been through a break up after 3 long years myself and can say it was right up there with my Father's death as one of the worst things I've ever gone through. I thought I had lost the only love I'd ever know and was depressed forever it seemed. Even through two or three other relationships I still felt this way. But, I have since met my wife and am very happy I stuck it out through the bad times to be living the "good" life now. One thing though that has changed - I can honestly say a woman will never hurt me like that again. I don't know if it's the fact that I still miss her and still love her, or if it's something I have learned from this telling me I'll be all right. Whatever it is I am stronger now. You will be too. Life only gets better man. ------------------ Gunning for 12's! Buy your parts here ICQ# 42269241