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Old 10-10-2002, 06:20 PM   #1
MustangKelly96
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Talking Newspaper Headlines in the Year 2035

Newspaper Headlines in the Year 2035

*Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest
country in the world, California. *White minorities still trying to have
English recognized as California's third language.

*Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops & livestock.

*Baby conceived naturally . . . Scientists stumped.

*Authentic year 2000 "chad" sells at Sotheby's for $4.6 million.

*Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory Of the
Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria, and Lebanon.) *Iraq
still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least ten more years
before radioactivity decreases to safe levels. !

*Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally,
but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

*George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

*35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

*Texas executes last remaining citizen.

*Upcoming NFL draft likely to focus on use of mutants.

*Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inch.

*Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it
crashes BEFORE installation is completed.

*New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screw-drivers and baseball
bats must be registered by January 2036.

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Old 10-10-2002, 06:30 PM   #2
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HA! LOL. Those are good.

Exercise and diet, huh? Who woulda thought??? Although I guess that wouldn't matter in Texas or California.....
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Old 10-10-2002, 07:07 PM   #3
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Default Re: Newspaper Headlines in the Year 2035

Quote:
Originally posted by MustangKelly96
Newspaper Headlines in the Year 2035




*Baby conceived naturally . . . Scientists stumped.




*35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.


These are my two favorites . I think after 35 years, doctors will still be stumped with weight loss!!! And a baby conceived naturally...I'm sure it will be a less frequent occurance than it is today. Good Headlines!!
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Old 10-10-2002, 08:13 PM   #4
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Hi Kelly,
Don't know where you found them but there pretty good. I wouldn't doubt if that was to come true. Funny... Odie
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Old 10-10-2002, 10:32 PM   #5
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hehehe those are good. problem about the first one is that its so true about the language
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Old 10-10-2002, 11:20 PM   #6
Topless In Texas
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Thumbs up THESE ARE PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!1

Quote:
Originally posted by MustangKelly96
Newspaper Headlines in the Year 2035

*Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory Of the
Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria, and Lebanon.) *Iraq
still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least ten more years
before radioactivity decreases to safe levels. !


*35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Gee, i havent tried that yet!!!!!!!

*Texas executes last remaining citizen.
hehehe...just fried another this week! GOTTA LUV that death penalty!


*Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inch.
LOL!!!!!!!!!!! CANT WAIT to see the ROCKETS this year w/ that 7 ft. + Jap we got!!!

*Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it
crashes BEFORE installation is completed.
OOH!!!! I NEED IT NOW....MY situation is critical! Im getting a copy on Sunday, and gonna try to fix this POS!

THOSE ARE GREAT KELLY!!!!!!!
btw: MY KID ROCK keychain BROKE the other day! His pic fell out! But...I found it!

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