Dog Pet Peeves About Humans

cyberstang5.0 · 11-06-2002, 10:10 AM

DOG PET PEEVES ABOUT HUMANS
1. When you run away in the middle of a perfectly good leg humping.
2. Blaming your farts on me...not funny.
3. Yelling at me for barking... I'M A *******' DOG YOU IDIOT!!
4. How you naively believe that the stupid cat isn't all over everything while you're gone. (Have you noticed that your toothbrush tastes a little like cat butt?)
5. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly who's walk is this anyway?
6. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose...stop it.
7. Yelling at me for rubbing my *** on your carpet. Why'd you buy carpet?
8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet...idiot.
9. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.
10. Dog sweaters. Have you noticed the fur? Imbecile.
11. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your **** up when you're not home.
12. When you pick up the crap piles in the yard. Do you realize how far behind schedule that puts me?
13. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out everytime we go back.
14. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain, you nitwit.
15. Invisible fences. Why do you insist on screwing with us? To my knowledge, dogdom hasn't yet solved the visible fence problem!!

1969Mach1 · 11-06-2002, 11:11 AM

hahaha lmao...

Those are some pretty good ones.

§am.

jj_jonathon · 11-06-2002, 11:41 AM

lmao...good one

....walking away from a perfectly good leg humping....thats hilarious...

PKRWUD · 11-06-2002, 04:06 PM

Those were excellent!!! I almost didn't read it cause I figured if I'd heard one dog joke, I'd heard them all, but I was very wrong!

Most Excellent!

Take care,
ÅChris

MustangKelly96 · 11-06-2002, 11:34 PM

Holy ****! Those were funny!!!

11-07-2002, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cyberstang5.0
DOG PET PEEVES ABOUT HUMANS

14. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain, you nitwit.

lmao, i swear thats what my dog is thinking.

11-06-2002, 10:10 AM	#1
cyberstang5.0 347ci of HORSE POWER!!! Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 1,416	Dog Pet Peeves About Humans DOG PET PEEVES ABOUT HUMANS 1. When you run away in the middle of a perfectly good leg humping. 2. Blaming your farts on me...not funny. 3. Yelling at me for barking... I'M A *****' DOG YOU IDIOT!! 4. How you naively believe that the stupid cat isn't all over everything while you're gone. (Have you noticed that your toothbrush tastes a little like cat butt?) 5. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly who's walk is this anyway? 6. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose...stop it. 7. Yelling at me for rubbing my * on your carpet. Why'd you buy carpet? 8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet...idiot. 9. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous. 10. Dog sweaters. Have you noticed the fur? Imbecile. 11. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your **** up when you're not home. 12. When you pick up the crap piles in the yard. Do you realize how far behind schedule that puts me? 13. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out everytime we go back. 14. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain, you nitwit. 15. Invisible fences. Why do you insist on screwing with us? To my knowledge, dogdom hasn't yet solved the visible fence problem!!

11-06-2002, 11:11 AM	#2
1969Mach1 HEY I CAN SET A NAME NOW! Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 2,556	hahaha lmao... Those are some pretty good ones. §am. __________________ 1969 Mustang Mach 1Sold 351-4V Windsor, 4 Speed MACH 1 - Moving At The Speed Of Sound. 1979 Mustang Indianapolis 500 Pace Car For Sale - Email me for Info 302-2V, 3-Speed Auto One of 2,106 made One of 405 sent to Canada. Yes those are caution lights, and No you can't pass me when there on. Ricer Hater's Club - Member #4

11-06-2002, 11:41 AM	#3
jj_jonathon Trisket Join Date: May 2002 Location: University of Florida, FL Posts: ½ Posts: 1,560	lmao...good one ....walking away from a perfectly good leg humping....thats hilarious... __________________ University of Florida - Physics Major My 02GT vert Media Center Pics BBK Underdrive Pulleys \| K&N FIPK (Gen II) \| Bullet Grille \| Mach 1 Chin Spoiler \| UPR Interior Parts \| XM Radio \| Audiobahn Subs Ricer Hater's Club Member #1/2 (30) http://www.ricehatersclub.com/

11-06-2002, 04:06 PM	#4
PKRWUD Junior Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Ventura, California Posts: 8,981	Those were excellent!!! I almost didn't read it cause I figured if I'd heard one dog joke, I'd heard them all, but I was very wrong! Most Excellent! Take care, ÅChris __________________ Webmaster: Rice Haters Club Jim Porter Racing Peckerwoods Pit Stop Support Your Local RED & WHITE!

11-06-2002, 11:34 PM	#5
MustangKelly96 Registered Member Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: The Great State of Indiana Posts: 353	Holy ! Those were funny!!!