The Ant and the Grasshopper

PKRWUD · 10-03-2002, 04:31 AM

THE ANT & THE GRASSHOPPER:

ORIGINAL VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, ABC, and CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome". Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share".

Finally, the EOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried, before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.

The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

The Sandman · 10-03-2002, 09:39 AM

So wait...
The moral of the story is to be poor and sue hard working people?

302 LX Eric · 10-03-2002, 09:44 AM

What's really sad is that there is more truth in that little story than you may think.

Excellent post, Chris.

E

ultraflo · 10-03-2002, 10:25 AM

True, true... VERY well phrased, btw

Jesse Jackson

...I feel sick to my stomach now, thanks!

"Such is the way of the world."

Hillary

tireburner163 · 10-03-2002, 11:05 AM

What's sad is that it's true.

95mustanggt · 10-03-2002, 12:23 PM

CANADIAN VERSION:

The ant works hard in the low heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. Unfortunately he's taxed half of what he does. If he tries to work longer each day, the government, just taxes him even more.

The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. He pays no taxes and gets free food and housing from Unimployment Insurance. Come winter, the ant runs out of food because he was taxed so much he couldn't save enough for the entire winter. He calls the Government Unemployment office to see if he can get some of the freebee's that the greasshopper got.

Unfortunately the Government puts up lots of red tape and the ant and will not get any support for several weeks.

The Grasshopper on the other hand is doing quite well. His Unemployment has expired, but Welfare has now kicked in. Luckily for him, welfare pays better than most low paying jobs.

The Grasshopper continues to eat lavishly and becomes quite fat over the winter.

The poor ant trying to make enough money to buy food starts a business selling acorns to squirrels. Unfortunately he did not put his signs both in English and French so the government fines him and since he can't pay goes to prison.

The Grasshopper in the mean time developes a horrible illness from lack of excersise and over eating. He goes to the hospital to get free medical help, but has to get in a long line because the same thing has happened to all the other grasshoppers. While standing in line talking about all the free welfare money they get, our grasshopper dies from lack of treatment.

The ant just gets out of prison, but is told that because the health care system needs more money to heal all the fat, unemployed grasshoppers, he has to go back to work right away and at the same time they are going to increase his taxes to 60% and impose an additional 7% Goods and Service Tax on everything he buys, this would be in addition to the 8% Provincial Sales tax he already pays.

The any says screw this I'm moving south of the boarder, I'd rather put up with Spiders

Fox Body · 10-03-2002, 05:27 PM

Whoa.......................

That (both versions) is deep........ Man...... Deep. I have to save that one.

However, I do have some thoughts on the whole matter, but maybe I should just let this one go......

95mustanggt · 10-03-2002, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fox Body
However, I do have some thoughts on the whole matter, but maybe I should just let this one go......

Dude, this is message forum, you are suppose to share your thoughts!

DAN-MAN · 10-03-2002, 06:28 PM

Quote:

Jesse Jackson ...I feel sick to my stomach now, thanks!

[color= red]Jesse Jackson[/color] [size= 3]SUCKS.[/size]

Daniel.

ultraflo · 10-03-2002, 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DAN-MAN
[color= red]Jesse Jackson[/color] [size= 3]SUCKS.[/size]

Daniel.

Exactly!

1969Mach1 · 10-03-2002, 07:49 PM

Wow couldn't of put them better myself without offending anyone. That is a very true one about Canadians....

Maybe you can talk about the mosqitos that just flew here, that work for cash, don't pay no taxes, but yet tax payers pay for them when they get sick and need medical attention. I'm pretty pissed on how our Canadian goverment handles things....

Here is a little story that's going on in a few towns around me, I'm not here to offend anyone but mostly to make a statement. I hope no one takes any offence to it.

We have a town just north of us that is known for it's large farms, and they farm alot of stuff for Ontario such as Carrots, Lettuce, etc etc etc. Now every year they bring people from Mexico (I love Mexicans and have NOTHING agaist them) to farm these crops. I really have no problem with this other then we have a unemployment rate of like 8%. That is 8% of the population. Now there is apx. 11,874,400 people that live in Ontario. Now that means we have apx. 950,000 people that do not work. That also means 950,000 people that I and every other hard working person from Ontario has to pay for these people to stay home and sit on there fat ***. Now I will give a buffer saying that not all of these people are like this. But the majority of these people stay at home, don't even look for jobs, and if you want to find these people you check the liquor or beer store, or the local Bingo Hall spending tax payers money. So my question is why do we bring people from Mexico (all expensises payed, food, transportation, house to live in, everything) when we have 950,000 people within a few hours away that can do this job. Once again I have nothing agaist Mexicans. I love them hands down for there hard working attitude. If the goverment wants my solution, send these bumbs here that don't want to work, to a country where they have to fight for survival, and bring the people who are willing to work there *** off and make this country a better place to live in.

Just my 0.02...

Once again, hope I hurt no ones feelings, this was just simply a vent, as I get taxed when I have school and everything else to pay for.

§am.

DAN-MAN · 10-03-2002, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Once again, hope I hurt no ones feelings, this was just simply a vent, as I get taxed when I have school and everything else to pay for.

[size= 5]TAXES SUCK!!!![/size]

Daniel.

95mustanggt · 10-03-2002, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DAN-MAN
[size= 5]TAXES SUCK!!!![/size]

Daniel.

Becareful what you say. Taxes are very important and with out them we would be in a lot of trouble. The problem is in Canada an average of 66% of our earning go back to the government. That's an average! In Canada the more money you make the more you pay, so in the end everyone makes the same amount, after tax. What this does is discourage people from working harder to climb the ladder, work overtime, and striving for more. It also sends good highly trained engineers and managers south of the border (I am a good example).

Taxes are good if they are low and spent well. The Canadian government finds ways to spend $3000 on things that should cost $100.

HotRoddin · 10-03-2002, 10:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 95mustanggt
Taxes are good if they are low and spent well.

Thats like an oxymoron ... I've been on this planet a long time and i've yet to ever see that !!!

MidNiteBlu 5.0 · 10-03-2002, 10:20 PM

Sam the reason why the mexicans are brought up there and in california to work the fields is that the majority of Americans and Canadiens will not do that kind of work. the mexicans for the most part are happy to do the work for such meager pay because even the crappy furnishings they have is normally better than what they have in Mexico. i dont know if you have ever been to mexico but the living conditions are VERY bad. the only nice places are the resorts where the population is more vacationing Americans than Mexicans.

Later,
Nick

1969Mach1 · 10-03-2002, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 95mustanggt
Becareful what you say. Taxes are very important and with out them we would be in a lot of trouble. The problem is in Canada an average of 66% of our earning go back to the government. That's an average! In Canada the more money you make the more you pay, so in the end everyone makes the same amount, after tax. What this does is discourage people from working harder to climb the ladder, work overtime, and striving for more. It also sends good highly trained engineers and managers south of the border (I am a good example).

Taxes are good if they are low and spent well. The Canadian government finds ways to spend $3000 on things that should cost $100.

I worked for the goverment for a few months and I can vouch for that. If you seen some of they money they spent you'd be pretty upset.

§am.

95mustanggt · 10-04-2002, 07:46 AM

There are very very very few governments that know how to spend money properly. Unfortunately the only government body in Canada that even comes remotely close is Alberta.

With the Liberals considering raising the Federal tax rate yet again, I'm getting so sick of this bullsh*t!

I've got crappy roads
A health system that's about to calapse on itself
No military
No infrastructure

For what? I paid over $18,000 in taxes last year, just to the freaking Feds! I didn't even live in F***king Canada and I still had to drop my pants!

Better leave now before I get pissed off....

302 LX Eric · 10-04-2002, 08:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by 95mustanggt
For what? I paid over $18,000 in taxes last year, just to the freaking Feds! I didn't even live in F***king Canada and I still had to drop my pants!

Better leave now before I get pissed off....

Ouch!

E

DAN-MAN · 10-04-2002, 06:20 PM

Quote:

There are very very very few governments that know how to spend money properly. Unfortunately the only government body in Canada that even comes remotely close is Alberta.

With the Liberals considering raising the Federal tax rate yet again, I'm getting so sick of this bullsh*t!

I've got crappy roads
A health system that's about to calapse on itself
No military
No infrastructure

For what? I paid over $18,000 in taxes last year, just to the freaking Feds! I didn't even live in F***king Canada and I still had to drop my pants!

Better leave now before I get pissed off....

Whoa! Easy there, bud. No need to get uncivil. Not yet anyways...

Daniel.

Rev · 10-04-2002, 07:32 PM

FWIW, there are some extremely wealthy Mexicans. If you've been down there and haven't seen their gated haciendas, then you just haven't been in the right places. Not saying that there's a whole lot of them, but there are wealthy Mexicans.

Rev

10-03-2002, 04:31 AM	#1
PKRWUD Junior Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Ventura, California Posts: 8,981	The Ant and the Grasshopper THE ANT & THE GRASSHOPPER: ORIGINAL VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC, ABC, and CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green." Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome". Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake. Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share". Finally, the EOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried, before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case. The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood. __________________ Webmaster: Rice Haters Club Jim Porter Racing Peckerwoods Pit Stop Support Your Local RED & WHITE!

10-03-2002, 09:39 AM	#2
The Sandman Registered Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Fay NC Posts: 179	So wait... The moral of the story is to be poor and sue hard working people? __________________ « Red Firebird » [ A4 ][ W68 ] [ Interior Painted Red/Black ][ Wings West Spoiler (Black) ][ Firebat Decals ] [ (^ How-to For ^) ][ Zaino'ed x 17 ] [ Mobil 1 ][ Flowmaster 80 ] - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - LS1.com Moderator FirebirdV6.com Moderator North Bay Mustang Moderator

10-03-2002, 09:44 AM	#3
302 LX Eric or '331 LX Eric' Join Date: Jan 1999 Location: Columbus, Ohio Posts: 2,142	What's really sad is that there is more truth in that little story than you may think. Excellent post, Chris. E __________________ 1991 5.0 LX Coupe - 40,750 miles 331 cu. in. / Tremec 3550 / BFG Drag Radials 12.22 @ 114.31 mph - w/1.89 60'

10-03-2002, 10:25 AM	#4
ultraflo NX dealer-man Join Date: Sep 1998 Location: Peoria, Illinois Posts: 977	True, true... VERY well phrased, btw Jesse Jackson ...I feel sick to my stomach now, thanks! "Such is the way of the world." Hillary __________________ RLS Racing! 93 LX 9.20 @ 147mph 03 Mach 1 12.39 @ 116mph Last edited by ultraflo; 10-03-2002 at 10:31 AM..

10-03-2002, 11:05 AM	#5
tireburner163 It's a lot like a race car Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Meridian, MS Posts: 4,130	What's sad is that it's true. __________________ 1987 Buick T-type 1998 HD Electra Elide

10-03-2002, 12:23 PM	#6
95mustanggt Registered Member Join Date: May 2000 Location: Kamloops, BC Posts: 2,875	CANADIAN VERSION: The ant works hard in the low heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. Unfortunately he's taxed half of what he does. If he tries to work longer each day, the government, just taxes him even more. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. He pays no taxes and gets free food and housing from Unimployment Insurance. Come winter, the ant runs out of food because he was taxed so much he couldn't save enough for the entire winter. He calls the Government Unemployment office to see if he can get some of the freebee's that the greasshopper got. Unfortunately the Government puts up lots of red tape and the ant and will not get any support for several weeks. The Grasshopper on the other hand is doing quite well. His Unemployment has expired, but Welfare has now kicked in. Luckily for him, welfare pays better than most low paying jobs. The Grasshopper continues to eat lavishly and becomes quite fat over the winter. The poor ant trying to make enough money to buy food starts a business selling acorns to squirrels. Unfortunately he did not put his signs both in English and French so the government fines him and since he can't pay goes to prison. The Grasshopper in the mean time developes a horrible illness from lack of excersise and over eating. He goes to the hospital to get free medical help, but has to get in a long line because the same thing has happened to all the other grasshoppers. While standing in line talking about all the free welfare money they get, our grasshopper dies from lack of treatment. The ant just gets out of prison, but is told that because the health care system needs more money to heal all the fat, unemployed grasshoppers, he has to go back to work right away and at the same time they are going to increase his taxes to 60% and impose an additional 7% Goods and Service Tax on everything he buys, this would be in addition to the 8% Provincial Sales tax he already pays. The any says screw this I'm moving south of the boarder, I'd rather put up with Spiders __________________ 1995 Mustang GT 20016 F150 Lariat Super Crew

10-03-2002, 05:27 PM	#7
Fox Body Mustang Maniac Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: GA, U.S.A Posts: 2,266	Whoa....................... That (both versions) is deep........ Man...... Deep. I have to save that one. However, I do have some thoughts on the whole matter, but maybe I should just let this one go...... __________________ 351W-powered 1979 Ford Mustang Ghia notchback '79 Video @ Idle Stock 5.8L under 4" cowl 'glass hood, C4 w/ Transgo shift kit, Holley 750 cfm, Edelbrock Performer RPM intake; Fluidyne Al radiator, Flexalite 175 electric fan, 1 5/8" MAC shorty headers, FRPP Al driveshaft; S&W 6-point cage; 2.5" Off road H-pipe, 2-chamber Flowmasters, 8.8" Rear w/ 3.55s; Weld wheels (15x6;15x8), Front: 225/60/15, Rear: 275/50/15 Nitto NT 555R Drag Radials; 14 x 4” K&N X-stream air filter. '92 GT (5-speed) Small In Car Video Stock 5.0L, 2-chamber Flowmasters, MAC CAI, Tri-Ax, Al pedals... "Red, thou art my companion. Hasten now your quickened metamorphosis to Green that I may conquer all who dare abide there beside me. May they be left thither behind burnt black." ---Fox Body

10-03-2002, 07:49 PM	#11
1969Mach1 HEY I CAN SET A NAME NOW! Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 2,556	Wow couldn't of put them better myself without offending anyone. That is a very true one about Canadians.... Maybe you can talk about the mosqitos that just flew here, that work for cash, don't pay no taxes, but yet tax payers pay for them when they get sick and need medical attention. I'm pretty pissed on how our Canadian goverment handles things.... Here is a little story that's going on in a few towns around me, I'm not here to offend anyone but mostly to make a statement. I hope no one takes any offence to it. We have a town just north of us that is known for it's large farms, and they farm alot of stuff for Ontario such as Carrots, Lettuce, etc etc etc. Now every year they bring people from Mexico (I love Mexicans and have NOTHING agaist them) to farm these crops. I really have no problem with this other then we have a unemployment rate of like 8%. That is 8% of the population. Now there is apx. 11,874,400 people that live in Ontario. Now that means we have apx. 950,000 people that do not work. That also means 950,000 people that I and every other hard working person from Ontario has to pay for these people to stay home and sit on there fat *. Now I will give a buffer saying that not all of these people are like this. But the majority of these people stay at home, don't even look for jobs, and if you want to find these people you check the liquor or beer store, or the local Bingo Hall spending tax payers money. So my question is why do we bring people from Mexico (all expensises payed, food, transportation, house to live in, everything) when we have 950,000 people within a few hours away that can do this job. Once again I have nothing agaist Mexicans. I love them hands down for there hard working attitude. If the goverment wants my solution, send these bumbs here that don't want to work, to a country where they have to fight for survival, and bring the people who are willing to work there * off and make this country a better place to live in. Just my 0.02... Once again, hope I hurt no ones feelings, this was just simply a vent, as I get taxed when I have school and everything else to pay for. §am. __________________ 1969 Mustang Mach 1Sold 351-4V Windsor, 4 Speed MACH 1 - Moving At The Speed Of Sound. 1979 Mustang Indianapolis 500 Pace Car For Sale - Email me for Info 302-2V, 3-Speed Auto One of 2,106 made One of 405 sent to Canada. Yes those are caution lights, and No you can't pass me when there on. Ricer Hater's Club - Member #4

10-03-2002, 10:20 PM	#15
MidNiteBlu 5.0 I got something to say Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: San Diego, CA Posts: 1,557	Sam the reason why the mexicans are brought up there and in california to work the fields is that the majority of Americans and Canadiens will not do that kind of work. the mexicans for the most part are happy to do the work for such meager pay because even the crappy furnishings they have is normally better than what they have in Mexico. i dont know if you have ever been to mexico but the living conditions are VERY bad. the only nice places are the resorts where the population is more vacationing Americans than Mexicans. Later, Nick __________________ 91 LX Hatch 5.0 - made for the twisties 89 LX Hatchback 5.0 5spd. stolen/stripped 4/7/05 http://www.mustangworks.com/cgi-bin/...splay.cgi?3494 1987 Toyota Pickup Ricer Haters Club Member #33 Want a custom gauge cluster for your Vintage Mustang? www.jmeenterprises.com

10-04-2002, 07:46 AM	#17
95mustanggt Registered Member Join Date: May 2000 Location: Kamloops, BC Posts: 2,875	There are very very very few governments that know how to spend money properly. Unfortunately the only government body in Canada that even comes remotely close is Alberta. With the Liberals considering raising the Federal tax rate yet again, I'm getting so sick of this bullsht! I've got crappy roads A health system that's about to calapse on itself No military No infrastructure For what? I paid over $18,000 in taxes last year, just to the freaking Feds! I didn't even live in F**king Canada and I still had to drop my pants! Better leave now before I get pissed off.... __________________ 1995 Mustang GT 20016 F150 Lariat Super Crew

10-04-2002, 07:32 PM	#20
Rev Registered Member Join Date: Nov 1998 Location: Houston, Tx. Posts: 3,887	Wealthy Mexicans FWIW, there are some extremely wealthy Mexicans. If you've been down there and haven't seen their gated haciendas, then you just haven't been in the right places. Not saying that there's a whole lot of them, but there are wealthy Mexicans. Rev __________________ '66 Coupe, 306, 350-375 HP, C-4, 13.07 e.t., 104.8 mph, 1/4 mi. O.B.C. #2 '66 coupe