Dilemma - my 16-year old

[Mustang_289]

My son and I have been building up an 88GT since last August - it's been on the road now for a couple of months. During the whole process of building this car - my son and I have talked about racing. There's a right place to race and a wrong place to race. We have a straight-line track not more than 20 miles from our house.

Well - my son and one of his buddies were doing a little cruising and my son was asked by a ricer, "do you wanna race". Well that's where things started going down-hill. They raced down a somewhat secluded residential road - and apparently a goose was in the middle of the road - causing both drivers to lose control. The ricer got the worst of it and jumped the median strip across the other lanes - luckily no oncoming cars. My son was able to hold the pony from crossing the median strip but did hit a curb at 60+ mph - blowing the front time and wheel. Don't know if anything else was damaged as yet.

Both drivers were charged with wreckless driving - luckily the cop cut them some slack and didn't write them up with wreckless driving & racing.

Here's my dilemma - we've told him that if there was any racing on the streets, or wreckless driving with the car his license is ours. He's got a July court date and could lose his license after the court date. Not sure what to do long-term with my son and the mustang. My wife didn't want us to get the car - as she was always against a 5.0 for a 16-year old. There are a few options that I'm considering - selling the car(least favorite as I enjoy the time with my son working on the car), continue fixing it up and not allowing him to drive it for a while, taking it off the road and making it solely a weekend straight-line car. Has anyone on this BBS experienced a similar dilemma with their son?

[tireburner163]

Well, you son made a mistake, everyone does. However, you had already discussed street racing with him, he did it anyway. I'm sure it was harmless enough, but he still did it. I would not sell the car, however I would keep it has a weekend car for yourself, and after a period of time(and I'm not talking about like 2 weeks, I mean a good while) give it back or sell it back to him.

[Mr 5 0]

Take it off the road and make it a weekend straight-line car.

This way, you get to work on it with your son, he can still enjoy the car but the dangers and temptations of street racing are eliminated.

Frankly, your son proved beyond a doubt that he is too immature for this car on the street. Yes, the ricer challenged him but he could have said 'no', but didn't. Now, he has to pay a price. That's real life; actions have consequences. Often unpleasant. Lesson learned?

Frankly, 16 is very young for a modified Mustang and 16 is also very young to expect an adult level of maturity when tempted by another teenager wanting to race.

Some adult judgement was needed here, too. As it stands, the car is damaged, your son has legal problems and making the 'Stang a track car is probably the best compromise you can strike, in my opinion.

[Mercury]

While I dont have any kids, and probably wont in have any, I still have some suggestions and possibly insight.

I personally feel that a stock, let alone modified Sports car (5.0, LS-1, 4.6 GT's, Cobras) is a bad choice for someone who's just got his license. For several reasons.

Experience. Ability to deal with situations sprung on you in a split second where one delayed reaction or false move can mean serouis injury, money, and most importantly...Death. Any Vehicle can hydroplane, slide on ice, or have a blow out, but having 240+ RWHP with a limited slip, or locking diffrential and a driver with little expereince can cause some problems there alone.

AGE=Maturity. No offense to your son, we all make mistakes, Trial and error is the best teacher, but I know I was not mature enough to handle a powerfull car. And after I was almost killed in an accident when I was 16, I saw that I didnt need a powerfull car till I learned to handle what I have (Which at the time was a 64 1/2 coupe with a 170 Straight 6, still have it..In storage) No matter how much you tell a person something, no matter how many pictures you show them, or how many personal stories or experiences you tell them, Most will have to find out the hard way.

Maybe this experience for him was for the better. WOuldnt you rather of had him had this one bad racing experience (Was it his first race??), and learn from it, and possibly shy away from street racing, than have had him win...And get hooked, and get a little to secure with safety?

Possibly the damage to the car, the ticket, the possible loss of his license will be enough to show him this is serouis. And that he could of been serouisly hurt, or hurt someone else.

I share a similar opinion with MR 5.0 when it comes to what to do with the car. Make it a Strip car, you all can still work on it, and he can learn about racing in a "Safe" enviornement. Possibly get him a 4cyl Stang, or a V6 stang, or a what ever you want to get him

[Rev]

My advice is somewhere in between. I feel that your 16 year old son has probably learned a lesson.

My advice is to continue to let him drive the car, but maybe make him work to pay the fine.

You and your son could go to the track on Friday nights occasionally so he could race legally and relatively safely.

That would let you spend even more quality time with him and would set a good example as well.

Rev

[StoplightWarrior]

So did he beat that ricer?

[1fastchick]

My dad let my brother start driving his 97 T/A 6speed and I begged him and begged him Not to cause I let him drive my 12sec gt once and he couldn't deal with it. ( i know sorta different but not much) My brother at the time was heavily into the party, drinking, and trying drugs cause all his friends where doing it. Well they have a court date now and my dad finally began listening to me and won't let him drive the t/a. He is was to immature for it and he tries to race the car he drives now (4beater) against SS, Cobras and anything else. Which included almost hitting a cop one day.

You layed the rules down now you have to enforce them PERIOD. The problems that steam from my brother is cause my dad who "SAY" he was going to take his liscense and the car away but he never did. It maybe harsh but make it a weekend racer and let him drive it at the track but no car on the road. If you don't back up what you say he will run a mile with what little slack you cut him.

[Rev]

There is another lesson to be learned here. While hitting the goose might be unpleasant, it would not be a catastrophe. Bent grill, bloody radiator, dead goose, etc.

Rev

[MidNiteBlu 5.0]

My parents waited until i was 17 and had already had a year of driving under my belt before they let me buy my car. I drove an 86 olds cutlass all through my junior year of high school. I bought my stang in september of this year and i am graduating this year . At the time of driving the olds i wasnt liking my parents decision but in turn i think it was a good one. After hearing so many tales of 16 y/o's who just got thier license and have a fast car wrecking it, i can see that it probably could have been me.

So i think you should keep it as a weekend toy and get him something slower to drive until you know that he has more experience behind the wheel.

Later,
Nick

[Ponycar_302]

Tough decision. Mr. 5.0 gave the most sensible advice. I happen to be a little more strict. You laid down the rules. You two have had the talks. Like it or not, your son chose to completely disregard everything you've talked with him about. My choice would to be to sell the car. Make sure he's there to watch it go too. You have to let him know what he did is unacceptable. I'm sure you two do other things together that you enjoy. Sell the car and buy a new bass boat. Everytime he steps foot on the boat he'll be reminded of what he did. After one or two fishing seasons he might be ready for another car.

[Unit 5302]

His license is as good as gone anyway. The state DOT is going to yank his license when he's convicted. Reckless driving is considered at least a misdemeanor, and I've never heard of a state that wouldn't revoke, or at very least suspend a license for 30 days to 6mo. I have no doubt the prosecutor is going to try and throw the book at him and make an example out of him with all this anti-street racing sentiment currently going around. What you need to do now is some research on the subject. I'd take his keys simply because you said you would. You have to stick by what you say. Realize you gave your son a car that was built to go fast, and perform. Telling him not to use the car as it was designed is probably a little short sighted.

I agree that a modified 88 GT is probably not a wise choice for the first time driver. It just has too much under the hood. What you do with the car is your choice. I don't know what a semi-residential street is, but there aren't too many of those suitable for much street racing, period. By the way, if a goose is in the road and you have nowhere to go, you turn it into road jerky. It's something he should have been taught in drivers ed. Make sure he is better versed on what to do in emergency situations.

Best of luck to you,

Kell

[Jeb_Bush_2000]

Don't feel too bad about the rim and tire; I hit a curb at 25-30 and blew the tire and destroyed the wheel. If that's all that happened to the car at 60mph, your son is very, very lucky.

[Rev]

Both my boys as teenagers had accidents. To me, that's pretty much a given. I think that's quite often the case.

My hope is that they (teenagers) will gain some insight and experience from these mishaps.

Why don't we parents try to help them benefit from these mistakes rather than just punish them?

Rev

[Ponygirl67]

I would say that since you had the talk with him and very clearly laid down the rules, that you have to stick to it...DON'T let him drive the car again...ever. Keep the car for weekend warrior for yourself if you can afford it, make him deal with the consequences of his actions, and make him buy his own car when he gets his license back if he loses it....good luck.

[Mustang_289]

Thanx everyone - good input from all. I've already taught my son how to handle any car when it spins out. I was planning on taking my son up to a local road-race course where they offer aggressive driving for teens.

We did take his license away right after the wreck and don't plan on giving it back until after the court date in July.

We're going to wait till after his court date before we make the final decision on the car. According to the cop - because he's a juvenile, he'll be required to take a driving course and after completion he will get his license back and no nothing on his record.

[Unit 5302]

Originally posted by Mustang_289
...According to the cop - because he's a juvenile, he'll be required to take a driving course and after completion he will get his license back and no nothing on his record.

According to the prosecutor, and the police, my friend wasn't going to lose his license for fleeing a few years back. It wasn't their call to make, it was the DOT. Unfortunately, when the DOT revokes a license for a juvenille, it's usually until they turn 18. Make sure you find out what the laws are on your own. You definately want to know the facts when you see the arraignment officer.

[Mustangbelle306]

You can be strict without selling the car...

Actually, having the car chill in the garage with NO driving priveleges would probably be a more effective lesson than just making it disappear (out of mind, out of sight, etc).

Commenting on earlier posts, I started my driving career with a 4 banger, then moved to a 6, and then to my GT and notch Yeah, I probably could have handled a V8, but it was nice to be able to get some driving experience without worrying about losing control of a RWD car with a good amount of HP.

It pretty much sounds like you know what you are going to do, and I'd never try to suggest any advice to a person already brave enough to have a teenager in the house But I will wish you the best of luck, and let us know how it goes in July!

Belle

[Girls can too]

Being the oldest of 5, (who are mainly teens now). I've seen it all. haha! With my own, my hubby and I began teaching our little girl from the wee age of 1, DO NOT directly disobey. To knowingly do something that you were specificly told not to do by a disciplining authority. i.e. Us, Grandparents, Teachers.

She is given a lot of freedom, she is given a lot of say, and she's a wonderful, well behaved 8 yr old. She knows that certain rules, like yours on street racing, are guaranteed the highest form of punishment because if she broke one of them, she'd be directly disobeying us.

You and your wife probably don't expect much more from your teen than good grades, taking out the trash, and the specific rules like above. Therefore, I think you are doing the right thing by not letting him slide. Too many teens do these days. Besides, he needs to think of how he'd be paying if he'd killed someone in that race...i.m.o. he got off easy.

In the end, you might save his life...and/or someone else's because of your choice. Thanks. Because while I drive home with my daughter in tow, I praise parents like YOU when some teen blows past us in a car he's not experienced enuff to handle.

I do believe that you should work on the car for weekend track visits, ect. Especially with a teen boy, you can never have too many things to spend time on - together. Good luck to you.

[Skyman]

I disagree with almost everyone here.

I would do everything I can to help your son to not loose his liscense in court. Having you on his side to help him will let him know you care for him and are there to back him up.

Of course you need to punish him and let him know what he did was wrong and you arent happy about it. But dont you think he already knows that? Hes going to have to deal with the consequnces of his actions, and Im sure hes learned his lesson.

My best advice is to drive the car around with him and make sure he is able to handle it.

Sure he directly disobeyed you, but we all have to learn from our own experience. How many times did you do what your parents told you not to do? Atleast he wasnt out selling drugs or stealing.
It definatly was poor judgement on his part, but with having a fast car this is something he will have to deal with, and learn to keep it to the track only.

I think being firm, but leanient will get the most respect from you son and keep him on the right track.

DONT LET HIM LOOSE HIS LISCENSE OR HIS CAR.

Skyler

[89 Cobra LX]

I'm a little confused here and I'm not trying to flame anyone.

What on earth did you think a 16-year old was going to do with a 5.0 Mustang? I know why I bought mine. Probably the same reason 95% of us own one..... PERFORMANCE.

If you give him the car back, he will race it again. He learned a valuable lesson early. You really should've expected this (racing not wrecking) to happen. Don't be too rough on him.