What tip can you give about loving?
 

There has been alot of posts about relationships breaking up and people who've had there heart broken because of people who cheat. I'm just curious, what has anyone learned from there once love? and any story cause of it. I got one lesson that I was told but should of stuck to it.

I broke up with my g/f 3 or so weeks ago after over a year, a fairly good friend that I know threw work had the same thing happen, he told me as hard as it is, don't be friends with her. It will only make it worse when your sitting there and she's telling you about these guys. I was a knob and never listened. I stayed friends, and a part of me wanted to get back together and this part got bigger although she started hanging out with guys which left me with no say in it but still hurt. Then one night one of the guys tried to kiss her and she said she backed away and left for home. Which still hurt. I found out last night that it wasn't the case as such. He was all over her that night and grabbing her in areas even though we're broken up still bother me alot as she still wants me back and still gives me a kiss every now and then. And it's only been 3 weeks, and it was more then a kiss. So what have I learned, I've leard. If your relationship ends in pain, run away from it. It'll hurt but don't go back to be friends, I've relised why people after they break up can't be friends. It just makes situations worse. I told her last night that I don't want to talk to her again. That hurt so much but I'm making myself sick knowing she is going out with that guy again today and who knows what will happen. And I knew her friend (who was going out with my good friend) was going to break up her relationship after 7 months for the same reason my g/f and I broke up, and over the same guy. I told him to come talk to me when it happens, but I never told him what it was but he knew. He messaged me this morning saying we have to get this guy back for what he did to our relationship. I won't result to violence but I wish I knew a way to get this guy back for doing what he did. I do turn 18, 2 months today so I am then legal to buy a gun..... :D But I don't think that will solve much, plus I want to do it while I'm angry and crazy. Anyway I'm going off topic of my own long a** thread. So I'm just curious what everyone can teach others about there previous love.

§am.

Tip - Love is over rated.. Don't bother

Bradley

Love, love, love
 

When we're 17, we still have a lot to learn about love and committment but most of us don't realize that (at that point) and assume that the girl/guy we are dating is 'it' - forever and the world starts and stops when that person is with us.

That's typical, often quite a nice feeling and also dangerous because along with the intense emotions we have to learn that there is more than one person in the world who will love us and that we'll love back.

Neither girls nor guys know what they truly want at 17 and both hormones and emotions run very high and can lead to rash decisions. I think this is rather obvious.

If you love her, let her go is a cliche but still valid.

You're not ready, she's not ready, whatever, but the relationship is probably just one of many you'll both have and you would do well to distract yourself with other things besides thinking about this girl and getting crazy about her being close to someone else.

You don't own her - never did - and she has a right to be with someone else, as do you, by the way. Centering on this one girl is a mistake and you probably realize that so let me restate it for you.

Move on, there are other great girls out there but you'll never find them moping around having revenge fantasies about her new boyfriend. That's loser stuff and you're no loser so let her go and get busy with your life. Another girl will come along. You're only 17 and this is just one experience in a long life of love and relationships you'll have. Don't let it make you crazy because only you can decide where to go from here and living in the past is really boring.

Best of luck to you.

Sam, from what i understand, love is a very delicate thing, Especially at 17. But anytime someone is in love with another and something like this happens, you always have to do what is best for the person you love.

So she stills wants to be with you, and shows that from time to time, but she also let another guy get all over her and touch in "certain areas"? Sam, i don't think she's worth trying to get back to tell you the truth. Move on, you deserve better than a girl that says she wants one thing, but her actions show that she actually doesn't mind the complete opposite. My friend is involved in the same kind of thing right now but it is much less of a scale than this so it's hard to compare the two. but it's still dangerous to put your trust in what she says when in fact she's enjoying the freedom of being single again.

"Son... Don't ruin your life like I did. Get as much poontang as you can before you die" Shallow Hal.:D

WANTED: Meaningful Overnight Relationship

Take care,
~Chris

Just remember NEVER GET "P" WHIPPED your 17 just have fun until your ready ta get serious ( after you finish school and can support yourself)dont let puppy love be the death of you go play in the street for a while.

Waste of time
 

I spent the better part of my freshman year in college with my head so far up my g/f's arse I didn't know if it was day or night unless she opened her mouth.

Seriously, unless you can just hang out with a girl and have fun, don't bother. The odds of her 'being the one' are stacked against you. I always recall my first love. I was 16, driving a 944 dating this cute redhead.

Dang, I miss that car!;)

OKm wait , look if you want things to change in your love / relationship life then get a grip on what REALLY happended( that is not a insult to you ) drop all the dumb crap and see the light . Most ladies don't care for men with no self respect nor those that turn to violence when a problem is at hand. As I see it men are problem solvers so do that by stepping back looking at what you learned move on and apply it to the next time you see it Rejection is a ***** kicker but we get it too! Do you honestly thins that if you hurt this guy in some way thats gonna make her drop to her knees ant beg for you to come back? 'NOT'
So take a good look at yourself and say bunk it I gotta be me!
and go get the next one.

Induction - Did you just now finish reading his post?:confused:

yes . I did the bandwagon thing an skipped to the end . sorry

I don't know if I agree about my age having something to do with my love, and yes I know I don't own her or ever did I'm just saying it hurts when your relationship ends and there is another guy all over your girl so fast. I believe I am new to love and such but I still believe I have a good sense of what it is and what I'm looking for in life. I took my relationship very seriously. I'm not like every other teenager that you may sterotype me against. I wasn't like ohh.. let's go chill at a frineds house and get drunk and stuff, like most people my age. Maybe the difference was she wasn't old enough to love.

Either way . . . .
§am.

Anyone got some tips on love?

pony_power_90

I can't agree with you there, I beleive it can be one of the greatest feelings in the world.

Hey man its cool. We al lcant agree on everything all the time. I just speak from my viewpoint. Myabe I am nieve and cold hearted I just think its all blown way out of proportion.

Bradley

I have become a bitter, untrusting guy from seeing and experiencing "Love". It can be the greatest thing in the whole world, or the absolute worst. In the end I have learned lots, but am still hoping to find someone to restore my faith in it. :(

sam trust me at 17 you still gotta lot to learn (no insult intended you sound like a cool guy), hell i'm 22 and i know i still have lots to learn. as you get older you will understand more and the relationships will be different than back in high school. me and my g/f broke up about the same time as you and yours. she thought we were more like friends as she said, i think that has gotta be the lamest excuse. i never had a (girl)friend that i did stuff like we did, with. we are still friends, but the way its working out is that i will only see her every few months or weeks as i'm moving away for a job i took after the break up. i am still friends with several of my ex-girlfriends cause back when i was 15-18 i and they never expected to be with each other forever. but all i can say is go out be young, be single for awhile, cruise for awhile it will get better, hell its getting better for me already. i know what you are going through cause i'm going through most of the same things. it will get better and you will find someone else.

-murray

Sam,
I'd seen enough of life, love, death and hate by the time I was your age to think much the same way you do. The older I get, the more my age just catch's up with my life experience.

I'm not trying to say that I know you, just what I've read. The same guy that gets all torn up by his girlfriend runs around 'defending' Ford power v. some kid in a Honda that thinks its fast.

There is a part of you that is truly a 17 year old guy. Let him run the show for a while. Cruise the Mustang for chicks, and use your mad skills to work that scene for a while. You'll be suprised what will happen.

Here's a secret about love too. Women know which men are interested in women. If you try to show them you are, they will see redundancy, not interest.

This fits my life to a "T". Yeah I could argue that I am tired of being hurt crap all day long. Life goes on, Im sure there is someone out there that will restore my " Faith " in the breed. Until then, I will continue to view things from a warped prespective.

Bradley

Tip #1 All lasting relastionships start as friends.

Tip #2 All relationships are built from trust, no trust, your wasting your time and theirs. *Note* Breach that trust, it's OVER.

Secondary but important tips:

Tip #3 Find a skinny woman, if you marry her, she will fill out. If shes huge, she'll get huger.

Tip #4 Don't find a girlfriend at a club or a hangout, Church's and parks are a few great places. Cute dogs attract women< barrow one.

Tip #5 Check there grill. Bad grill means bad breath, "Yuck Mouth." If she looks like shes been chewing rocks, stay away.

Tip #6 Don't trust a bunch of gear heads for love advice :D

best advice given all year in my opinoin.. Do your own thing. Its more genuine that way. rewards are much greater.

Bradley

lol, good one:D

ROFLMFAO!!!
Re: #4 women are also attracted to cute DOGS ie. "men"
Re: #5 you can get them fixed if it's worth it to you , or have them all removed ,it depends on your """ULTIMATE GOAL""" lol

Re: Waste of time
 

HAAHAAAA Exactly Deuce!


:cool:

You know what, that made me feel good. lol =) I really agree on #2 and wished I relised that one along time ago. Tip #3, I'm told to look at her mother, if she is fat then there is a good chance she will be too. But fat woman need lovin' too. :rolleyes: :D
#4 I don't go to Church... but I will find the perfect girl some where perfect. And I already got a cute dog, girls love her. :D #5 is just to funny #6 even funnier. :D :D :D

Thanks for other replies aswell. But I don't just meen tips on my situation, on just general love.

Chris how long has it been man? :p

§am.

Oh is that what you wanted??
Sorry but thats too deep for me !!


Out.

26 years on this earth, 3 years of marriage, 1 long term relationship, several short term relationships, 2 one night stands and a couple late night, drunken chats with a couple of girls have brought me to one conclusion:

there is no magic formula, no secret tip, no easy way to a perfect relationship. If there was there would be no single people, no divorces, and everyone would be happy. It doesn't have everything to do with age, I was ONLY :p 23 when I got married (some say that is young, but I know some that were much younger yet, and are still together after 10 years :eek: ;) ).

Keep trying, experience everything life has to offer, so times you win, sometimes you lose. Hopefully you're better off than before.

That is my advice, take it as you will.

General rule #1.
Men find a woman and get married in hopes that she will never change. Women find a man to marry and hope he will.

Rule #2
If you're hanging out with somone and they get rude to a waiter and it makes you confused, run. Pay for a cab, take a walk, rent a car. All choices are simpler and cheaper than paying for a divorce lawer later.;)

Rule #3
Be yourself. It's easier than trying to remember who you were the night before if you happened to black out.

In a nut shell..... Ditto.http://www.gamers-forums.com/smilies...ve/luxlove.gifhttp://www.uniquehardware.co.uk/serv...e/bolletje.gifhttp://www.gamers-forums.com/smilies.../smirlove2.gif

Another good tatic, is to find someone who you have fun talking with and ask if she has a sister.:D

Works best when the person you are asking makes references to waving a scarf around at the races, and has a good working background of Ford auto history.;)

Now who could that be? BTW is the Poodle suposed to be on the hip???? I swear it was at the knee B4 I sent it to the cleaners?

a lil help here please lol:o

I couldn't tell you for sure, last time I saw one it was lying on the floor.;)

Dang that's going to be a fun cruise.

What tips can I give about loving..

Use your tongue... :D

I think the keyword is compromise.


Bob

Deuce, What are you doing in my sisters room?! Mom told you to stay out of there!!
Dammit I guess I cant barrow hers, oh well Ill just have to wear this one.

What do you mean you can't borrow hers? She obviously isn't using it. ;) Unless you can't use an iron.:D

A iron???? hua? is that anything like a Dremel? Oh I know what you mean A iron head , No I don't have a Harley thats my sister your thinking about agian ya know the short one with the blonde hair:D

Umm.......is it December yet??;)

I called her today for you , as soon as her computer is up she will be here for ya . so hang in there. Oh and I dont think that was her skirt on the flooreither. It must of been the neighbors!

That's either the best news I've heard all day, or a REALLY mean joke. :D

AHHHhhhhh. I see.

Wrong.

That goes with the assumption that everyone wants to be married. I have seen WAY TOO MANY really good friendships get wrecked due to marriage. I am very single, and very happy about it. I have been for the better part of the last 3 years. There has been a speed bump or two, but for the most part it has been the happiest I have ever been. I spent years believing that the only way I could truly be happy would be to get married, but I don't believe that at all anymore. I see marriage as a sacrifice that is made to procreate, and not much more. The first 2-4 years can be great, but then the reality sets in.

This is going to piss some people off, but I see marriage in a very similar light as I see religion, alcohol and drugs; as a crutch for people who are afraid of being alone.

:)

Take care,
~Chris

The breed. LOL!!! I'm sorry, I had to pick myself up off the floor after reading that. Bradley, i think you may have some issues. LOL.

In all seriousness, this is without a doubt the single most important truth.

Oh, you're good. You're very, very good.

Last Sunday.

:)

Take care,
~Chris

Its taken you this long to figure out I got issues. I know I have some serious issues. I dont deny it, I need to get a handle on things but its hard. Been single for almost 5 years. Got hurt bad. Been walked on hard ever since and dont trust any of em. From my experiences ( and dont flame me for this, Im just giving you some prespective into my knowledge ) women are for the most part, evil, back-stabbing, and kenieving. They all plot against men for there own personal growth. I honestly have only talked to two women ( one from this site, and you know who you are. ) that are ever willing to comprimise on anything. Its thier way or the highway. Well what about my way ******. I dont bust my *** all day just to make sure you've got nice things just ot ge walked on all night because I left the toilet seat up. Shut up, I dont wanna hear it. I comprimise everyday, at work, at home. and what hsa it gotten me, JACK ****.. thats what. So when some ( and I say SOME becuase I havent met a lady yet ) of you get off your high horse and are ready for something meaningful and honest let me know. Until then quit bitching.

Sorry

Bradley

I guess what I was trying to say is, "whatever works for you, it's not easy, if it is going to happen, it will".

Single life could be good, but I guess I'm happy being married. If I wasn't I'd be broke, but I'd have a 10 second mustang in the driveway right now ;)

I didn't mean that to sound harsh, I was smiling as I was typing it. You're right, though; different strokes for different folks. I am always happy for anybody that finds something in life that makes them feel happy and complete, including religion, alcohol, drugs, or marriage. Or for that matter, cars, or football, or antique shopping, or even Sprint car racing. If it works for you, AWESOME!!!! I just haven't been "lucky" enough to find the level of joy that you have. I am the happiest I have ever been, though, so I'm really planning on keeping things this way. Maybe that means that I really do have a deep seated fear of committment, I don't know. I do know that for the most part, life is good right now, so I'm just enjoying the ride.

:)

Take care,
~Chris

Hey Bro, I hear ya. Don't ever appologize for your life experience. If anyone should appologize, it's the person that is too narrow-minded to understand that you have your reasons for feeling the way you do. Just remember that NO ONE PERSON is 100% right, ALL the time, besides me of course. ;)

Take care,
~Chris

well honestly I am only 18 so i really cant say much in this topic...but i dont think of it as a crutch for all...i do see lots of people get into relationship, no matter how crappy, and stick with it because they could never be without someone...i honestly loved being single throughout most of highschool, with the occasional girl n such, but i spent my senior year with my current girlfriend and am continuing to be with her through college (both going to UF)...now im not afraid to be without someone...her and i just really click...we were friends long before we went out too...all our relationship has done is brought us closer...so i guess nearly every situation varies and will have a different outcome...it is all about finding one of those few people out there that will make you truly happy and her truly happy...maybe we should feel sorry for and envy chris at the same time...lol :D...as i said though...i'm 18 so i dont have decades of experience like some people on the boards... :)

jonathon

that may be why you would be broke? hehe...:D

I don't really think it's all about age, of course. My parents first started dating when my mom was a junior or senior in high school. They were married when my mom was 18 (dad was 21) and my sister was born 4 months after they were married (Shame on them, pre-marital sex...hehe...they tried using the whole 'pre-marital' thing against me, but that got shoved down their throat pretty quickly, hehe....ANYWAYS.....). They have been married for....ummm....counting....24 years now. I don't think relationships that started that early usually last that long, but hey, it's possible. There's proof.

Sam- I know you don't think that age really has ANY thing to do with it, but in your case, I think it does--on your ex's part AND your part. We're like the exact same age, and I've been in similar situations as to what you're in right now. My current girlfriend and I started dating 4 years ago. We have not been together that whole time, but a majority of it we have. I have a GREAT question for you, that I think describes your whole situation. I'm not meaning to sound like a dick or anything, don't take it that way.

Do you love her because you need her? Or do you need her because you love her?

I think you have clung to her, you got attached, and you got obsessed (been there done that) with her. You felt like you needed her because you loved her. But really, you loved her because you needed her.

Another thing, I think you overuse and maybe don't comprehend true 'love'. That could use it's own huge debate. Define 'true love'. Kind of like defining 'cheating'.

I love my girlfriend, I definitely love her with all my heart. Am I in love with her? Possibly. Definitely? No. Do I think she's the one? No, I know she's not the one I will marry, at least not how I feel about her right now. She's great, she's honest, she's beautiful, etc. etc. etc. Is she the one? Doubtful. I have fun with her, everything is good. But we both have college to go through and we will both go our separate ways eventually. But now we're living for the moment, we don't want to get too far ahead of ourselves.

I am not afraid of being alone. Actually, I'm a very solitary kind of person. I enjoy spending time alone, I prefer it sometimes. I will not commit myself to spending the rest of my life with someone I don't have 'the perfect feeling' about. What is this feeling? I do not know. I don't plan on knowing until I feel it. If I never get that feeling, then I won't commit myself to marriage or a serious long term relationship. That's that.

Sam, don't take my comments the wrong way. I think you're a pretty cool guy and you've gone through some tough ****. I know what it's like and it sucks. You have been handling it good though, man.

Well, sorry if I sounded a little redundant with someone else's posts. I just kind of skimmed the thread. Peace.

-Ben

Sorry Sam that really bites! I am not going to give you any advice because I am clueless myself and I am 24!! Kindof sounds like your girl is teasin ya though kissing you every now and then and then going off with another!! Hope you find someone who will love you unconditionally and respect you for who you are!
Bye,
Karen:)

LMAO, oh that's awesome, where do you keep coming up with these?!?

http://members.mustangworks.com/95mu...images/lol.gif

And me!