What tip can you give about loving?

1969Mach1 · 08-13-2002, 08:14 AM

There has been alot of posts about relationships breaking up and people who've had there heart broken because of people who cheat. I'm just curious, what has anyone learned from there once love? and any story cause of it. I got one lesson that I was told but should of stuck to it.

I broke up with my g/f 3 or so weeks ago after over a year, a fairly good friend that I know threw work had the same thing happen, he told me as hard as it is, don't be friends with her. It will only make it worse when your sitting there and she's telling you about these guys. I was a knob and never listened. I stayed friends, and a part of me wanted to get back together and this part got bigger although she started hanging out with guys which left me with no say in it but still hurt. Then one night one of the guys tried to kiss her and she said she backed away and left for home. Which still hurt. I found out last night that it wasn't the case as such. He was all over her that night and grabbing her in areas even though we're broken up still bother me alot as she still wants me back and still gives me a kiss every now and then. And it's only been 3 weeks, and it was more then a kiss. So what have I learned, I've leard. If your relationship ends in pain, run away from it. It'll hurt but don't go back to be friends, I've relised why people after they break up can't be friends. It just makes situations worse. I told her last night that I don't want to talk to her again. That hurt so much but I'm making myself sick knowing she is going out with that guy again today and who knows what will happen. And I knew her friend (who was going out with my good friend) was going to break up her relationship after 7 months for the same reason my g/f and I broke up, and over the same guy. I told him to come talk to me when it happens, but I never told him what it was but he knew. He messaged me this morning saying we have to get this guy back for what he did to our relationship. I won't result to violence but I wish I knew a way to get this guy back for doing what he did. I do turn 18, 2 months today so I am then legal to buy a gun.....

But I don't think that will solve much, plus I want to do it while I'm angry and crazy. Anyway I'm going off topic of my own long a** thread. So I'm just curious what everyone can teach others about there previous love.

§am.

Coupe Devil · 08-13-2002, 08:29 AM

Tip - Love is over rated.. Don't bother

Bradley

Mr 5 0 · 08-13-2002, 08:41 AM

When we're 17, we still have a lot to learn about love and committment but most of us don't realize that (at that point) and assume that the girl/guy we are dating is 'it' - forever and the world starts and stops when that person is with us.

That's typical, often quite a nice feeling and also dangerous because along with the intense emotions we have to learn that there is more than one person in the world who will love us and that we'll love back.

Neither girls nor guys know what they truly want at 17 and both hormones and emotions run very high and can lead to rash decisions. I think this is rather obvious.

If you love her, let her go is a cliche but still valid.

You're not ready, she's not ready, whatever, but the relationship is probably just one of many you'll both have and you would do well to distract yourself with other things besides thinking about this girl and getting crazy about her being close to someone else.

You don't own her - never did - and she has a right to be with someone else, as do you, by the way. Centering on this one girl is a mistake and you probably realize that so let me restate it for you.

Move on, there are other great girls out there but you'll never find them moping around having revenge fantasies about her new boyfriend. That's loser stuff and you're no loser so let her go and get busy with your life. Another girl will come along. You're only 17 and this is just one experience in a long life of love and relationships you'll have. Don't let it make you crazy because only you can decide where to go from here and living in the past is really boring.

Best of luck to you.

Tod · 08-13-2002, 08:55 AM

Sam, from what i understand, love is a very delicate thing, Especially at 17. But anytime someone is in love with another and something like this happens, you always have to do what is best for the person you love.

So she stills wants to be with you, and shows that from time to time, but she also let another guy get all over her and touch in "certain areas"? Sam, i don't think she's worth trying to get back to tell you the truth. Move on, you deserve better than a girl that says she wants one thing, but her actions show that she actually doesn't mind the complete opposite. My friend is involved in the same kind of thing right now but it is much less of a scale than this so it's hard to compare the two. but it's still dangerous to put your trust in what she says when in fact she's enjoying the freedom of being single again.

WADS56 · 08-13-2002, 09:11 AM

"Son... Don't ruin your life like I did. Get as much poontang as you can before you die" Shallow Hal.

PKRWUD · 08-13-2002, 11:03 AM

WANTED: Meaningful Overnight Relationship

Take care,
~Chris

induction · 08-13-2002, 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by WADS56
"Son... Don't ruin your life like I did. Get as much poontang as you can before you die" Shallow Hal.

Just remember NEVER GET "P" WHIPPED your 17 just have fun until your ready ta get serious ( after you finish school and can support yourself)dont let puppy love be the death of you go play in the street for a while.

The Deuce · 08-13-2002, 11:21 AM

I spent the better part of my freshman year in college with my head so far up my g/f's arse I didn't know if it was day or night unless she opened her mouth.

Seriously, unless you can just hang out with a girl and have fun, don't bother. The odds of her 'being the one' are stacked against you. I always recall my first love. I was 16, driving a 944 dating this cute redhead.

Dang, I miss that car!

induction · 08-13-2002, 11:32 AM

OKm wait , look if you want things to change in your love / relationship life then get a grip on what REALLY happended( that is not a insult to you ) drop all the dumb crap and see the light . Most ladies don't care for men with no self respect nor those that turn to violence when a problem is at hand. As I see it men are problem solvers so do that by stepping back looking at what you learned move on and apply it to the next time you see it Rejection is a ***** kicker but we get it too! Do you honestly thins that if you hurt this guy in some way thats gonna make her drop to her knees ant beg for you to come back? 'NOT'
So take a good look at yourself and say bunk it I gotta be me!
and go get the next one.

The Deuce · 08-13-2002, 11:38 AM

Induction - Did you just now finish reading his post?

induction · 08-13-2002, 11:44 AM

yes . I did the bandwagon thing an skipped to the end . sorry

1969Mach1 · 08-13-2002, 12:57 PM

I don't know if I agree about my age having something to do with my love, and yes I know I don't own her or ever did I'm just saying it hurts when your relationship ends and there is another guy all over your girl so fast. I believe I am new to love and such but I still believe I have a good sense of what it is and what I'm looking for in life. I took my relationship very seriously. I'm not like every other teenager that you may sterotype me against. I wasn't like ohh.. let's go chill at a frineds house and get drunk and stuff, like most people my age. Maybe the difference was she wasn't old enough to love.

Either way . . . .
§am.

Anyone got some tips on love?

pony_power_90

I can't agree with you there, I beleive it can be one of the greatest feelings in the world.

Coupe Devil · 08-13-2002, 01:17 PM

Hey man its cool. We al lcant agree on everything all the time. I just speak from my viewpoint. Myabe I am nieve and cold hearted I just think its all blown way out of proportion.

Bradley

joe4speed · 08-13-2002, 01:26 PM

I have become a bitter, untrusting guy from seeing and experiencing "Love". It can be the greatest thing in the whole world, or the absolute worst. In the end I have learned lots, but am still hoping to find someone to restore my faith in it.

08-13-2002, 01:38 PM

sam trust me at 17 you still gotta lot to learn (no insult intended you sound like a cool guy), hell i'm 22 and i know i still have lots to learn. as you get older you will understand more and the relationships will be different than back in high school. me and my g/f broke up about the same time as you and yours. she thought we were more like friends as she said, i think that has gotta be the lamest excuse. i never had a (girl)friend that i did stuff like we did, with. we are still friends, but the way its working out is that i will only see her every few months or weeks as i'm moving away for a job i took after the break up. i am still friends with several of my ex-girlfriends cause back when i was 15-18 i and they never expected to be with each other forever. but all i can say is go out be young, be single for awhile, cruise for awhile it will get better, hell its getting better for me already. i know what you are going through cause i'm going through most of the same things. it will get better and you will find someone else.

-murray

The Deuce · 08-13-2002, 01:41 PM

Sam,
I'd seen enough of life, love, death and hate by the time I was your age to think much the same way you do. The older I get, the more my age just catch's up with my life experience.

I'm not trying to say that I know you, just what I've read. The same guy that gets all torn up by his girlfriend runs around 'defending' Ford power v. some kid in a Honda that thinks its fast.

There is a part of you that is truly a 17 year old guy. Let him run the show for a while. Cruise the Mustang for chicks, and use your mad skills to work that scene for a while. You'll be suprised what will happen.

Here's a secret about love too. Women know which men are interested in women. If you try to show them you are, they will see redundancy, not interest.

Coupe Devil · 08-13-2002, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by joe4speed
I have become a bitter, untrusting guy from seeing and experiencing "Love". It can be the greatest thing in the whole world, or the absolute worst. In the end I have learned lots, but am still hoping to find someone to restore my faith in it.

This fits my life to a "T". Yeah I could argue that I am tired of being hurt crap all day long. Life goes on, Im sure there is someone out there that will restore my " Faith " in the breed. Until then, I will continue to view things from a warped prespective.

Bradley

mustangII460 · 08-13-2002, 01:57 PM

Tip #1 All lasting relastionships start as friends.

Tip #2 All relationships are built from trust, no trust, your wasting your time and theirs. *Note* Breach that trust, it's OVER.

Secondary but important tips:

Tip #3 Find a skinny woman, if you marry her, she will fill out. If shes huge, she'll get huger.

Tip #4 Don't find a girlfriend at a club or a hangout, Church's and parks are a few great places. Cute dogs attract women< barrow one.

Tip #5 Check there grill. Bad grill means bad breath, "Yuck Mouth." If she looks like shes been chewing rocks, stay away.

Tip #6 Don't trust a bunch of gear heads for love advice

Coupe Devil · 08-13-2002, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mustangII460

Tip #6 Don't trust a bunch of gear heads for love advice

best advice given all year in my opinoin.. Do your own thing. Its more genuine that way. rewards are much greater.

Bradley

08-13-2002, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mustangII460
Tip #6 Don't trust a bunch of gear heads for love advice

lol, good one

08-13-2002, 11:21 AM	#8
The Deuce Registered Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 2,325	Waste of time I spent the better part of my freshman year in college with my head so far up my g/f's arse I didn't know if it was day or night unless she opened her mouth. Seriously, unless you can just hang out with a girl and have fun, don't bother. The odds of her 'being the one' are stacked against you. I always recall my first love. I was 16, driving a 944 dating this cute redhead. Dang, I miss that car! __________________ 1997 Mustang GT "The Freak" - 13.80 @ 101.70, 2.07 60' 1995 Honda VFR750 - not much @ really fast (actual data pending.) 1964.5 Mustang 289 Rice Haters Club Member #13

08-13-2002, 11:32 AM	#9
induction The Brit! Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Across the Pond! Posts: 694	OKm wait , look if you want things to change in your love / relationship life then get a grip on what REALLY happended( that is not a insult to you ) drop all the dumb crap and see the light . Most ladies don't care for men with no self respect nor those that turn to violence when a problem is at hand. As I see it men are problem solvers so do that by stepping back looking at what you learned move on and apply it to the next time you see it Rejection is a *** kicker but we get it too! Do you honestly thins that if you hurt this guy in some way thats gonna make her drop to her knees ant beg for you to come back? 'NOT' So take a good look at yourself and say bunk it I gotta be me! and go get the next one. __________________ Restored 1965 Coupe April Mare of the Month** RiceHatersClub Member #27

08-13-2002, 11:38 AM	#10
The Deuce Registered Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 2,325	Induction - Did you just now finish reading his post? __________________ 1997 Mustang GT "The Freak" - 13.80 @ 101.70, 2.07 60' 1995 Honda VFR750 - not much @ really fast (actual data pending.) 1964.5 Mustang 289 Rice Haters Club Member #13

08-13-2002, 11:44 AM	#11
induction The Brit! Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Across the Pond! Posts: 694	yes . I did the bandwagon thing an skipped to the end . sorry __________________ *Restored 1965 Coupe* *April Mare of the Month* RiceHatersClub Member #27

08-13-2002, 12:57 PM	#12
1969Mach1 HEY I CAN SET A NAME NOW! Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 2,556	I don't know if I agree about my age having something to do with my love, and yes I know I don't own her or ever did I'm just saying it hurts when your relationship ends and there is another guy all over your girl so fast. I believe I am new to love and such but I still believe I have a good sense of what it is and what I'm looking for in life. I took my relationship very seriously. I'm not like every other teenager that you may sterotype me against. I wasn't like ohh.. let's go chill at a frineds house and get drunk and stuff, like most people my age. Maybe the difference was she wasn't old enough to love. Either way . . . . §am. Anyone got some tips on love? pony_power_90 I can't agree with you there, I beleive it can be one of the greatest feelings in the world. __________________ 1969 Mustang Mach 1Sold 351-4V Windsor, 4 Speed MACH 1 - Moving At The Speed Of Sound. 1979 Mustang Indianapolis 500 Pace Car For Sale - Email me for Info 302-2V, 3-Speed Auto One of 2,106 made One of 405 sent to Canada. Yes those are caution lights, and No you can't pass me when there on. Ricer Hater's Club - Member #4

08-13-2002, 08:14 AM	#1
1969Mach1 HEY I CAN SET A NAME NOW! Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 2,556	What tip can you give about loving? There has been alot of posts about relationships breaking up and people who've had there heart broken because of people who cheat. I'm just curious, what has anyone learned from there once love? and any story cause of it. I got one lesson that I was told but should of stuck to it. I broke up with my g/f 3 or so weeks ago after over a year, a fairly good friend that I know threw work had the same thing happen, he told me as hard as it is, don't be friends with her. It will only make it worse when your sitting there and she's telling you about these guys. I was a knob and never listened. I stayed friends, and a part of me wanted to get back together and this part got bigger although she started hanging out with guys which left me with no say in it but still hurt. Then one night one of the guys tried to kiss her and she said she backed away and left for home. Which still hurt. I found out last night that it wasn't the case as such. He was all over her that night and grabbing her in areas even though we're broken up still bother me alot as she still wants me back and still gives me a kiss every now and then. And it's only been 3 weeks, and it was more then a kiss. So what have I learned, I've leard. If your relationship ends in pain, run away from it. It'll hurt but don't go back to be friends, I've relised why people after they break up can't be friends. It just makes situations worse. I told her last night that I don't want to talk to her again. That hurt so much but I'm making myself sick knowing she is going out with that guy again today and who knows what will happen. And I knew her friend (who was going out with my good friend) was going to break up her relationship after 7 months for the same reason my g/f and I broke up, and over the same guy. I told him to come talk to me when it happens, but I never told him what it was but he knew. He messaged me this morning saying we have to get this guy back for what he did to our relationship. I won't result to violence but I wish I knew a way to get this guy back for doing what he did. I do turn 18, 2 months today so I am then legal to buy a gun..... But I don't think that will solve much, plus I want to do it while I'm angry and crazy. Anyway I'm going off topic of my own long a thread. So I'm just curious what everyone can teach others about there previous love. §am. __________________ 1969 Mustang Mach 1**Sold 351-4V Windsor, 4 Speed MACH 1 - Moving At The Speed Of Sound. 1979 Mustang Indianapolis 500 Pace Car For Sale - Email me for Info 302-2V, 3-Speed Auto One of 2,106 made One of 405 sent to Canada. Yes those are caution lights, and No you can't pass me when there on. Ricer Hater's Club - Member #4

08-13-2002, 08:29 AM	#2
Coupe Devil Moderator Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Myrtle Beach SC Posts: 1,643	Tip - Love is over rated.. Don't bother Bradley __________________ 1990 GT, 347, TFS TW Heads, TFS Cam, TFS Track heat, Twin turbos, FMIC, T5. Built Ford Tough Moderator

08-13-2002, 08:41 AM	#3
Mr 5 0 Conservative Individualist Join Date: May 1997 Location: Wherever I need to be Posts: 7,487	Love, love, love When we're 17, we still have a lot to learn about love and committment but most of us don't realize that (at that point) and assume that the girl/guy we are dating is 'it' - forever and the world starts and stops when that person is with us. That's typical, often quite a nice feeling and also dangerous because along with the intense emotions we have to learn that there is more than one person in the world who will love us and that we'll love back. Neither girls nor guys know what they truly want at 17 and both hormones and emotions run very high and can lead to rash decisions. I think this is rather obvious. If you love her, let her go is a cliche but still valid. You're not ready, she's not ready, whatever, but the relationship is probably just one of many you'll both have and you would do well to distract yourself with other things besides thinking about this girl and getting crazy about her being close to someone else. You don't own her - never did - and she has a right to be with someone else, as do you, by the way. Centering on this one girl is a mistake and you probably realize that so let me restate it for you. Move on, there are other great girls out there but you'll never find them moping around having revenge fantasies about her new boyfriend. That's loser stuff and you're no loser so let her go and get busy with your life. Another girl will come along. You're only 17 and this is just one experience in a long life of love and relationships you'll have. Don't let it make you crazy because only you can decide where to go from here and living in the past is really boring. Best of luck to you.

08-13-2002, 08:55 AM	#4
Tod Registered Member Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: just outside of Slowville Posts: 299	Sam, from what i understand, love is a very delicate thing, Especially at 17. But anytime someone is in love with another and something like this happens, you always have to do what is best for the person you love. So she stills wants to be with you, and shows that from time to time, but she also let another guy get all over her and touch in "certain areas"? Sam, i don't think she's worth trying to get back to tell you the truth. Move on, you deserve better than a girl that says she wants one thing, but her actions show that she actually doesn't mind the complete opposite. My friend is involved in the same kind of thing right now but it is much less of a scale than this so it's hard to compare the two. but it's still dangerous to put your trust in what she says when in fact she's enjoying the freedom of being single again. __________________ If you drop your keys into molten lava just let 'em go 'cause, man, they're gone.

08-13-2002, 09:11 AM	#5
WADS56 gear banger Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: CHICAGO Posts: 1,144	"Son... Don't ruin your life like I did. Get as much poontang as you can before you die" Shallow Hal. __________________ 79 Hatch: NA 347, Stage 2 Canfield Heads, Victor JR. Intake, Blueprinted Holley 750 HP, Solid Roller Cam, Shooting for 10's on motor 93 LX: Tremec, dual friction clutch, fms flywheel, Hedman shorties, O/R H-pipe Ricer hater's club member #49

08-13-2002, 11:03 AM	#6
PKRWUD Junior Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Ventura, California Posts: 8,981	WANTED: Meaningful Overnight Relationship Take care, ~Chris __________________ Webmaster: Rice Haters Club Jim Porter Racing Peckerwoods Pit Stop Support Your Local RED & WHITE!

08-13-2002, 01:17 PM	#13
Coupe Devil Moderator Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Myrtle Beach SC Posts: 1,643	Hey man its cool. We al lcant agree on everything all the time. I just speak from my viewpoint. Myabe I am nieve and cold hearted I just think its all blown way out of proportion. Bradley __________________ 1990 GT, 347, TFS TW Heads, TFS Cam, TFS Track heat, Twin turbos, FMIC, T5. Built Ford Tough Moderator

08-13-2002, 01:26 PM	#14
joe4speed He said Member...heh, heh Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: Jupiter, Florida U.S.A. Posts: 3,718	I have become a bitter, untrusting guy from seeing and experiencing "Love". It can be the greatest thing in the whole world, or the absolute worst. In the end I have learned lots, but am still hoping to find someone to restore my faith in it. __________________ *Joe!* 1988 GT, 13.58@101mph Check out my listing! Click here! Or my website:www.joe4speed.com

08-13-2002, 01:38 PM	#15
digital3.3 Guest Posts: n/a	sam trust me at 17 you still gotta lot to learn (no insult intended you sound like a cool guy), hell i'm 22 and i know i still have lots to learn. as you get older you will understand more and the relationships will be different than back in high school. me and my g/f broke up about the same time as you and yours. she thought we were more like friends as she said, i think that has gotta be the lamest excuse. i never had a (girl)friend that i did stuff like we did, with. we are still friends, but the way its working out is that i will only see her every few months or weeks as i'm moving away for a job i took after the break up. i am still friends with several of my ex-girlfriends cause back when i was 15-18 i and they never expected to be with each other forever. but all i can say is go out be young, be single for awhile, cruise for awhile it will get better, hell its getting better for me already. i know what you are going through cause i'm going through most of the same things. it will get better and you will find someone else. -murray

08-13-2002, 01:41 PM	#16
The Deuce Registered Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 2,325	Sam, I'd seen enough of life, love, death and hate by the time I was your age to think much the same way you do. The older I get, the more my age just catch's up with my life experience. I'm not trying to say that I know you, just what I've read. The same guy that gets all torn up by his girlfriend runs around 'defending' Ford power v. some kid in a Honda that thinks its fast. There is a part of you that is truly a 17 year old guy. Let him run the show for a while. Cruise the Mustang for chicks, and use your mad skills to work that scene for a while. You'll be suprised what will happen. Here's a secret about love too. Women know which men are interested in women. If you try to show them you are, they will see redundancy, not interest. __________________ 1997 Mustang GT "The Freak" - 13.80 @ 101.70, 2.07 60' 1995 Honda VFR750 - not much @ really fast (actual data pending.) 1964.5 Mustang 289 Rice Haters Club Member #13

08-13-2002, 01:57 PM	#18
mustangII460 Factoy Five Roadster Join Date: May 2000 Location: Sevier Co,Tennessee Posts: 1,681	Tip #1 All lasting relastionships start as friends. Tip #2 All relationships are built from trust, no trust, your wasting your time and theirs. Note Breach that trust, it's OVER. Secondary but important tips: Tip #3 Find a skinny woman, if you marry her, she will fill out. If shes huge, she'll get huger. Tip #4 Don't find a girlfriend at a club or a hangout, Church's and parks are a few great places. Cute dogs attract women< barrow one. Tip #5 Check there grill. Bad grill means bad breath, "Yuck Mouth." If she looks like shes been chewing rocks, stay away. Tip #6 Don't trust a bunch of gear heads for love advice

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