New Joke
 

Okay, in a large wheat field, a blonde is trying to row a canoe. Another blonde passes by on the road passing the field and is very annoyed. She stops and vehemently yells, "You know, it's blondes like you that give us a bad name :mad:. If I could swim, I'd come out there and punch you in the nose!"

Okay, 2 "your mamma" jokes:

Your mamma is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money!

Your mamma is so stupid, she jumped out of the window and went up! :D

Okay, any new jokes, guys? Try to remember the ones you've posted b4 so that there are no repeats (unless they're really good :))

How about another your momma joke:

Your momma's so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!

Your mommas so fat when she takes a shower her feet dont get wet

Heh, heh. I like the "jumped in the air" one the best. :D

Re: New Joke
 

You know, this is sad, but my aunt sold her house for rent money. She had a house that was paid for, had been for years, and when she ran out of money, instead of doing like normal people and getting a job, she sold her house and ended up renting it from the guy she sold it to for $600/month. I wouldnt have paid $200/month for it, but the ****** that she sold it to wanted her out so he could dump a little of cash into it and sell it for twice as much as he bought it for. But I have to admit, now that I see what he did with it, it looks like a new house. It still pisses me off because my grandfather worked his hind end off to pay for that house.

Corny Joke:
Two peanuts walk into a bar. One was a-salted :D

Why did the farmer name his pig "Ink?"

Because it kept running out of the pen.... :rolleyes: :p

Fireman's Honeymoon
 

A young fireman got married. He was nervous talking about sex to his new bride, so he used some fireman lingo on the way to the honeymoon suite.
He said "Honey, when we get to the suite and I say 'bell one', that means ther is gonna be a fire." She understood his figurative speaking.
He said "When I say 'bell 2', we are going to the fire." She understood.
He said "When I say 'bell 3', we fight the fire, do you understand?" She said "yes."
So they get to the suite and he says "Bell One." A couple of minutes later, he says "Bell 2" and they proceed to the bed.
When he says "bell 3", they begin consumating their marriage.
After a few minutes SHE says "Bell 4." He said "I never said anything about bell 4." SHE "Bell 4 means you had better roll off more hose or get closer to the fire."