Update: Remember when she left me after 4.5 years? well....
 

Shes back. Back 5 days ago, begging for me, crying, pleading, refusing to take no for an answer. She has tried everything in the wrold to take me back, saying she screwed up sooo bad on and on. I didnt, Ive been seeing someone else recently. Not that its easy on me at all, of course I still have feelings for her, and shes just been a mess texting me and calling me crying her eyes out, showing up at my house, leaving presents, it goes on and on. I told her she needs time to get her self staright get through her pain on her own as I did. Ive tried not to be too nie cuz she didnt show me that much compassion when I was in her shoes. She texted me yesturday "What happens when you feel so dead and so numb instead that you dont care if your car goes over a bridge" of course that flipped me out I called her, and told her she better not do anything stupid over me, and she said she wouldnt. But god like I need more stress. ANyways just thought Id throw you guys an update for your own knowledge.

-Sky

http://forums.mustangworks.com/showt...threadid=42919

Thats the old thread, and thanks again for everyones advice at the time, it was very helpful.

Sky, your holding up good. Don't be a fool and fall for that schit!! You will regret it!! She won't change. If she left you once she will leave you again. Good luck man!

James:cool:

Like some told u back during the original thread, they thought she would come back. U had a good head on ur shoulders then...and u still have it now. Remain strong and do not give in. She realizes how she messed up, just like u realized it back then.
Ryan

tell her to bend over and grab her ankles...........that makes it much easier to kick her back to the curb.


I would suggest cutting all communicaion.

"What happens when you feel so dead and so numb instead that you dont care if your car goes over a bridge"............that's just her attention whoring, ignore it.

Ditto, but, it's good that you're in a stronger place now to deal with the emotional barrage.


Doing the right thing is the hardest thing to do. Knowing what the right thing to do is the second hardest thing. :D

sky, bro she has some issues, i wouldnt worry about it, not your problem, she had a good thing & screwed it up, oh well, too bad so sad, tell her to move on, she is just trying to drag you down again bro, dont go there, good luck bro, :D :D :D , cya, l8ter. :)

Sky, if you don't learn from history, you're doomed to repeat it. You know how hard it was before. Just imagine having to go through it again. Whatever you decide, just PLEASE be sure you're honest with yourself and know what you're doing.

I don't wanna say, "I told you so," but shoot, I was thinking it back in that old thread. I had a gut feeling she was gonna come a'poundin' on your door again. Call it my "bitch-sense." :D

Of course, you could just keep her on the side as a booty call and make her *think* you're back....no, wait, that's my evil side talking again. My bad.

I agree, Sky... you're doing the right thing by moving on. Unfortunately for her, she realized what she lost after the damage was done. She most likely will do the same thing again during any hard spot in any relationship. She left after almost 5 years in a stable relationship with little or no warning, so you are doing the right thing. No matter how hard it is to see her like this, at least you know how she acted when it was YOU suffering. I know it's hard, but live life, man!!! Enjoy the new woman you've found! Have fun! She'll be fine, it takes time for all of us to heal.
Good luck, Skyler, you're a good man.

Keep a-knockin' (but you can't come in)
 

Sky:

She'll get over you the same way you got over her: out of necessity. Ignore her. She deserted you for another guy. You grieved and suffered but you finally moved on with your life. That her little fling didn't work out is not your problem. The trust you once had between you is gone, or it should be, if you have any sense of dignity left. If you were foolish enough to take her back you'll always wonder what she's thinking if she looks just a little too long at some other man or makes a positive comment abouut some guy at work. That kind of latent mistrust can destroy you and certainly ruin a relationship. If you give her the slightest bit of encouragement, you're doomed - as far as moving on with your life minus the fickle g/f.

Ignore the drama bits, the appeals to your sympathy and the ego-boost you naturally get when a girl you still care about practically throws herself at you. It won't last. She dumped you for another guy because she didn't think you were marriage material and didn't treat her the way she expected to be treated. Fine. How much do you think her attitude has really changed? Right now she's near-desperate and thinks she's really blown it so she'll promise you anything to get you back, just like you would do if the situation were reversed. Problem is; it won't last and in six months or so when her fear of losing you has safely passed, she'll be whining about how you don't appreciate her and yada yada yada. Not to mention looking at other guys...maybe. See, you'll never know for sure, making a real, committed relationship rather tenuous, at best.

You know what to do but whether you can actually do it is up to you, Sky. Your life, your decision. We all wish you the best and hope you do what's right for you.

Good luck, Sky. You're going to need it. She doesn't know about this board does she?

Sorry I screwed up your last thread on this subject.:(

If you're seeing someone else, the healing process has begun....you have moved on. Now it's time for her to do the same.

Dude you better make sure she wasn't talking about one of your cars. It happened to a buddy of mine his ex got a hold of his GTO and totaled it.

Thanks guys. Wow this is a great relationship advice board. I have tried to be just friends with her, and its great having that person to talk to again, but eventually she finds a way to get it back onto us. Shes begged and pleeded, says she will pay for couseling, wants anything for me to give her a chance to redeem herself. I always believe that everyone deserves a second, chance, we all make mistakes. At one point I made a mistake about leaving her, granted it wasnt in the same fashion she left me. I dont think you can ever rule anything out 100%, you never know exactly what the future brings. I really think she needs time though, shes on an emotional roller coaster and is once again blinded by them. Obviously I loved her for a lot of reasons, and some of those reasons are still there. Im just not ready for a relationship, and shes messing with my head now making it spin even more. In time I dont know what will develop, but I really dont know what now. I just dont even have any idea what I want in a relationship now, or even if I want one at all, maybe I just want friends. Relationships are a mess, and I need to have time to myself to figure out what I want before I can be with anyone. And Im seeing this other girl I really liked, and things moved a bit fast, and now ive tried to put on the brakes. IM scared of being hurt again, Im scared I dont know what I want. Im scared that shes leaving, and if I get into anything I'll get my heart broken again. I also wonder how breanne has affected my feelings. I really dont know at this time. I just have to figure it out. Any how..... thanks again guys..... well see what the future holds, I really dont know, and dont plan on anything, well see what develops.

-Skyler

Skyler and the lonelyness of the long-distance runner
 

Sky:

Not exactly the reply I had hoped for but if you are as confused as you say then doing nothing - with anyone - is the best thing you can do for now. You're wise to know that getting involved with Breanne, now when you're both confused and emotionally distraught, would be dangerous and unfair to each of you. Keep that thought and do not get emotionally involved with Breanne or anyone else for awhile. You need time. Take it.

Just remember what I said:


So, about those pics?:cool:

Sky,

Tell her what you just told us. Tell her that if she's really serious about wanting to get back with you to just lay off. Like you said, you don't want to start back up with her right now, you're enjoying where you are, and you sure don't need the nagging or the pressure. Tell her to stow it and hold it. If in 6 months or 2 years you, for whatever reason, decide to give her another go, then see where she's at.

Give her the old, "If you really love 'em you gotta let 'em go" shpeal.

But keep in mind, as the Propellerheads say, "...it's all a bunch of history repeating."

--nathan

Ok, I was going to say something but I think that about sums it up, heeh. If you are as weak as I was then you are already back with her(9 yr lesson for me, but I finally got it). Just becareful friend, I've been there and if it becomes a back and forth relationship, there will be alot of good people hurt in the wake.

The whole thing is about life tho.. only you can live your life and make your decisions and at the end, you get the satisfaction of knowing you did it your way.

Good luck,

Rick

Thanks a lot guys. I appreciate it all. Give you an update when theres more to say.