Quote:
Originally posted by Mr 5 0
Sadly, too often I've seen guys (and I know that girls do this too) get talked out of (humiliated, really) dating or even hanging around some perfectly nice girl that didn't meet some ill-defined criteria that 'friends' had decided on.
Sometimes this is just a social status thing ('she lives on the wrong side of town' nonsense) but often, it's because the girl is a bit too studious ('nerd') or too athletic ('butch') or not very social ('loser') or simply not especially attractive by the standards of whatever group the guy belongs too. Very sad.
Fortunately this kind of clique-driven prejudice fades once you get past High School.
Once you've grown past these other-directed attitudes, you can get real about who you date and lose the 'movie star' criteria for potential dates.
I know in many instances, we'll meet someone who seems rather ordinary in the physical sense but after getting to know them awhile, we find that person rather interesting. They may be funny, witty, warm, sweet, smart, whatever - but they appeal to us through their personality and guess what? They start looking a lot better!
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This could not be more true for myself.
I must regretfully admit that I was one of the guys in high school that listened to their friends about who I dated. "She's a wh#$#, D'ont go out with her, she isn't that good looking, I heard that she ________, or any other sterotypical excuse that the guys could think of.
I found my self in a couple of bad situations because I DIDN'T do like they advised though. I'm glad I put myself in that place though. I am a lot more independent now because if I screw something up it's because
"I" screwed something up, not anyone else.
I've found myself attracted to many women that in high school where totally against what ever happened to be popular that week.
I'm interested in all women, for the most part. There are a couple of areas I decline from entering only because "I" have made the decision, no one else. I have grown a lot over the past four years and have come to realize that beauty
is in the eye of the beholder. Granted, I don't want to end up with someone that is absolutely "grotesque" but looks aren't the most important thing anymore. I enjoy beautiful women as much as the next guy but they're are so many more hidden attributes to the female sex that have made themselves evident in my search for the "Perfect Woman".
I believe that women feel the same way. I dont think that looks are as important to women as they once were. At least for my sake, I hope not! I'm not Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise but I don't consider myself to be the hunchback either (said respectfully). I just think there are too many people that date or do things because it's 'cool' to go with the star quaterback or the head cheerleader. What about that girl or guy that works hard to get good grades because they want to be a doctor or lawyer and provide a happy and safe living for a family?
I simply can't stand soap operas.
For one reason - I'm a guy, and the other reason is the shear lack of realism. I honestly can't think of any one person that lives life that way.
Be honest to yourself, honest to others, but most importantly, live life for yourself and no one else. I do not care in the least little bit what other people think of me. I'm happy doing what I do and living my own life. I just wish the rest of the world felt the same way.
Brad