[Fox Body]

The thing we must all remember here is that it is much easier to get offended from reading someone's post in a message board on a flat screen with 2 dimensional words and colors than it is talking with someone face to face. The computer is cold and inanimate.

For all the people who are getting "offended" or taking "offense" from Mustangbelle's comments for no SOLID reason and for those who felt they need to jump on the "defend Mercury" bandwagon: If this conversation were held in a room where we could all see each other and each other's facial expressions, it'd be a different atmosphere. The atmosphere of this post over the internet has gotten a little sour. It's not about all that. We're all friends here so lighten up. People who easily get offended--- grow some thicker skin please, b/c you will not survive in the world if you get offended so easily. You will be the first ones to get fired from a job b/c what the boss said "offended" you and you had to "put him in his place."

For the other side, as Mr 5 0 hinted, you guys who are giving the "tough love" need to make it clear what your intentions are. We are separated and cannot feel the "vibes" of each other. It is easy to misconstrue your "tough love" comments and so you need to take the time to add that extra statement that gets your point across in a friendly way (if that was your intention in the first place).

Hg, you post as much as you want about whatever. We don't mind. Rocket stated that there are a lot of MW members who are tired of reading about your love life and job life, but I assure you that there more of us who aren't tired of it and enjoy your contribution to this site, such as myself. Yes, you need to to be tough, but maybe that will come later. Right now, you feel like sharing your concerns here whether it's just to get things off your chest (or to vent), or if it is b/c you need advice and support. So we don't mind. Everybody is different. The "tough love" approach doesn't work for everybody (doesn't work for most people-- there's enough indifference and "tough love" out in the world )

Read the posts. Mercury has acknowledge the fact that he got a little pushy and needed to let off a little. Many of us told him that in a few of his previous posts about the firebird woman and he now realizes that to an extent, he was a little pushy and set his hopes a little too high too fast-- that he needs to "slow his roll" a little. Good, he already understands that so he's already conquered the first part of his problem-- knowing what it is and acknowledging it. Get off your "tough love" horse and give the brother a little sympathy. That's one of the problems with a lot of guys today, many think they are always just supposed to "be a man", "men don't cry", "keep a stiff upper lip", and all that crap and many of those guys either turn out deranged or just flat out indifferent to others' feelings. If you really want to show how much of a man you are, remember this: it takes a whole lot more guts to cry in public than it does to keep a "stiff upper lip."

To you others out there who don't agree with him posting these topics here or are "tired" of reading them, so what?!! then DON'T FLIPPIN READ THEM!!!! Why spend the effort and time to click on the link to the thread and spend enough time typing a message on your little keyboard just to add in your snotty little reply to a type of post you are tired of seeing??? Well, honestly, that is your opinion/feelings and you are just as entitled to them as Mercury or anyone else is to theirs...

I see it this way: I'm glad this message board is here. There are things that people can discuss here that they may feel more comfortable talking about such subjects b/c they do not really know the other people who post on this site. We all know that the more we disclose to others (especially those who are not family) about ourselves and about our problems the more vulnerable we make ourselves to snide remarks and being poked fun at for being weak or "soft" or whatever. This message board can provide an avenue that might allow someone to get something off his/her chest that he/she might have not been able tell a friend or family member b/c it would result in an uncomfortable situation. In some ways, for example, a guy may be more apt to talk about certain relationship problems in a message board where he doesn't KNOW the faces, but he knows he will get good advice and can share his concerns to people who care. Then he can get up from the computer and feel relieved that he got it off his chest, but at the same time not really having to worry about something like "Oh crap, why did I tell them that, now they're gonna pick at me for being soft" b/c he doesn't have to SEE us everyday or pass us in a hallway and get that uncomfortable silence that says "oh man, now this person knows this about me-- I shouldn't have said anything." I bet there are a lot of guys here that are able to open up a bit more while talking to their MW online buddies, b/c they cannot see the people who see their posts and the people cannot see them--- and in this case, that is a good thing. Everything has a purpose and I think that is a good thing-- this message board has a relevant cathartic quality to it and it is because of the people here who make it this way.