No one sings a song about how it really is.

[Mercury]

All of the movies, all of the songs, all of the poems that have been written about love, and how many of them actually portray a true sense of the emotions felt? None that I heard of.

This may be just me, it probably is, but Love is nothing like what any expression of art, or entertainment has portrayed it as...nothig close.

I have been in my fare share of relationships, mostly long ones. And the emotions that these songs sing about, or that these movies show, of happiness and completion, Just dont exist! I'm sick of it. Yes, there are moments of the Butterflys, and moments of immense pasion, desire, and a bond....but those moments are FEW AND FAR BETWEEN! At least in my love life.

Maybe it is me, maybe I do something that just locks out this happiness that I seek.

While I understand that the Fairy tale Love is nothing more than just a Fairy Tale, I have found nothing that even somewhat half hartdley comes close..NOTHING!

All I find is 80 percent pain and 20 percent other. All at the price of 100 percent effort.

All my relationships end up screwed up. Maybe it is me, maybe I wont allow myself to be loved, or cared for. Maybe It is me that pushes these women away. Or Maybe I'm just not worth someone else's understanding, or caring, or devotion. That is probably the most likely.

I'm sick of turning on the dam TV, or juicing up the stereo just to hear the blatant lies of love and all its granduar.

Valentines day if for the birds. Stuffed animals, ballons, and choclate....for what.....Nothing...A relationship should be special, and treated as such more than just one day a year...Hearts, flowers and dam stuffed animals should be given not just for holidays. You know, I have treated as many days as possible like Valentines day for the women i have been with...And it all ends up the same....PAIN. I hate this Dam pain and am sick of it. I hate Love and all the BS it stands for, or is supposed to.

It might as well be burried with Jimmy Hoffa, or swimming with Nessie in the Loch Ness, or riding a freaking flying saucer with Elvis and his Gray friends....Because if its actually out there...More than likely I'll never find it.

Might as well carry a god dam flag pole out in a thunderstorm. That would take away all the ill fated hopes of ever finding it (Love).