Before I marry

[mustangII460]

I didn't have a pre-nup when I got married and heres why.

First of all niether of us had a dime when we got married. So pretty much everything we've aquired has been from both of us. So splitting it down the middle would be no big deal to me.

Im in court EVERY day. I see pre-nups work the same as not having one. I see people getting out of their marriage with the things they brought to the marriage. With everything aquired during the marriage split down the middle. Pre-nup or not.

Now with that being said. Ive seen judges award personal property of either party to the other for payment or money owed. Lets say I owed my ex $3,500 in my share of rent, child support, or maybe even closing cost on the house. If I can't come up with the money Ive seen the judge award property valued of owed jointly debts.

Ofcourse throw in the crooks, I meen lawyers, and anything can happen.

Here about the only reason I would recomend a pre-nup. Say a wife doesn't work but is married for 20 years. She has a earning potential. She can ( and probably will) sue her husband for her lost wages while she sat at home, working. A pre-nup however couldn't stop a good lawyer from getting her a paycheck, but could save you from her getting any more than that.

[rwhite65]

As much as I would like to think I will find the love of my life, this society has really helped to screw things all up. If a pre-nup will help me with my security "should" the marriage fail, so be it.

Look at it this way, most of us don't put drive shaft loops in our cars...."wont happen to my car". But the ones who did and broke that u joint....boy were they happy they did it
Ryan

[Stang_Crazy]

Originally Posted by rwhite65

If a pre-nup will help me with my security "should" the marriage fail, so be it.

If you need security "incase" the marriage fails, aren't you setting it up for failure by doing that? Aren't you doubting your decision?? The thought of it not working and needing security to fall back on is a recipie for faliure before the committment is even made. Again just my opinion...maybe I have an old time way of thinking

[rwhite65]

With a decision like that, I am not sure I wont atleast have a little doubt in my mind. Sad to admit, but sometimes hard to ignore.
Ryan

[Unit 5302]

Originally Posted by Stang_Crazy

If you need security "incase" the marriage fails, aren't you setting it up for failure by doing that? Aren't you doubting your decision?? The thought of it not working and needing security to fall back on is a recipie for faliure before the committment is even made. Again just my opinion...maybe I have an old time way of thinking

Yeah, and if you put jackstands under your car when you jack it up, aren't you just setting the car up to fall? Your conclusion is so irresponsible that you obviously haven't given much thought to the whole concept. Some people may view the pre-nup as insurance in case they want to bail out of the marriage. I treat the concept as insurance in case the other person isn't as committed as they would indicate.

50% of marriages end in divorce because people aren't willing to work things out. WTF does that mean anyway? Work things out. That's what the people in that marriage have been doing since the inception of the relationship. The fact that women file for divorce twice as frequently as men sends a giant red flag up to me. If 50% of all marriages end in divorce, 80% of marriages end citing irreconcilable differences, and 67% of all divorces are requested by women, it would seem likely to me that a man faces better than a 1 in 4 chance that a woman will file for divorce for a stupid reason. There should never be an irreconcilable difference. What a stupid concept. Do you not think a difference in personality so great that it would lead to a divorce should have probably been readily apparent BEFORE the couple got married? There has been research that cites a woman divorces for power in many cases.

http://www.angryharry.com/tgWhyWomenDivorce.htm

What are the chances that your floor jack will fail while you're under the car? 1:4? Hell no. Not even 1:1000. You don't have to agree with getting a divorce. All it takes is one person in the relationship wanting to bail for any reason, and that relationship is done. Divorces papers are practically dispensed by gumball machines these days, and it's high time that people took responsibility for the problem.

I'm doing my part by being a loner. No divorces for me cause I'm not married, and at this point, I have no intention of becoming married.

[Stang_Crazy]

Originally Posted by Unit 5302

Yeah, and if you put jackstands under your car when you jack it up, aren't you just setting the car up to fall?

My car doesn't express feelings, emotions, or thoughts. Comparing a car on jackstands to a marriage doesn't make any sense. A car is an inanimate object. A human being is not. Apples to oranges.

Originally Posted by Unit 5302

Your conclusion is so irresponsible that you obviously haven't given much thought to the whole concept.

Irresponsible because I don't care about petty materialistic things?? If I lost everything it wouldn't matter. It would matter WHY I lost everything but not WHAT I lost. In the end, it's just stuff. A marriage is a union where two people begin a life-long journey together. If I ever make that committment, I'm not going to worry about 'covering my ass'.

Originally Posted by Unit 5302

I treat the concept as insurance in case the other person isn't as committed as they would indicate.

I would hope a grown adult could judge whether they are ready for marriage or not....but sadly some adults don't know how to commit to someone or something. The divorce rate today is a scary number and like you, I am doing my part and staying single.....for now.

[Topless In Texas]

Im still mad about the whole thing, and decided to delete this post. I should not say dont marry. Prenups can work, I guess, depending on where you live. I can understand why someone would want one, if they have alot to lose. I can completely understand, after seeing what I had seen.
I would say to anyone, Do what you feel is right. I just saw a whole side of dealing first hand with a divorce that was very nasty, and got caught in the middle of it all.
Although I would be hurt if asked to sign one, I would do it. But, like stated in some other posts. Alot of prenups are not worth the paper they are printed on. And, its a shame that when a divorce turns that nasty and ugly, the permanent scars that are left on the one who was the 'target' to get screwed. They never look at marriage the same again.
TNT