UNIT,MERCURY,@ the rest of you guys that are having relationship troubles,step in

10-22-2001, 02:06 AM

Honestly guys I sit here and I read your posts and wonder why people wont say what they are truely feeling in a relationship.

I'm in a relationship myself been in one for 4 or 5 years now.In this relationship I need to move in order to be with this particular person,which I have no trouble with.What I have trouble understanding these days is why dont people open up with their true feelings? Why dont they say when sumthin isn't goin the way that they would like it to be? I don't understand...

This person I'm involved with says she loves me,which I do not doubt,but at the same time,there is this problem again that I talk about above,and you all know what I'm talkin about,the person that in the relationship isn't happy about sumthin but yet you have no idea what it could be.You can tell in their actions,etc.

------------------

Paxton Blown 87GT
ICQ:91504337

Mercury · 10-22-2001, 02:19 AM

Mustangguy

I have tried that route. No matter what, I said or did something wrong. We tried for a year to work on our communication skills. All we did was fight.

I never did anything right according to her. No matter how much Time I spent with her during the week, and anyother time, she would get so PISSED if I said "Honey, can I spend some time with the guys."

Even then, around 9 at night (When things just start to get interesting) she calls me on my cell phone and lays this guilt trip on me about not seeing her. I'd go over her house and spend the rest of the night there.

My friends were getting mad at me, my girl was getting mad at me, it was like no matter what plans I had made, and she had Okay'd earlier, she would call and expect me to drop everything to come over.

Now if it was an emergency, I would, But I hate being Jerked around like that, and I HATE DOING that to my friends/girlfriends. All I asked for was one Saturday night out of every two weeks to go racing and hang out with the guys.

She didnt trust me at all, she thought I was off running around on her. She even accused me of seeing TIM C's sister (Shes engaded and her Fiancee' hangs out with us).

Oh well. I told her how I felt, and did it as civalized and calm as possible. She just didnt seem to care, even though I bent over Backwards to make her happy.

I'm doing what I like now, well for the most part........... Given the circumstances, I feel like I'm handling things pretty good.

Maybe because I can breathe now.

10-22-2001, 02:40 AM

Mercury

I understand man,I guess I didn't make myself clear on my topic.What I was tryin to say in my topic is what does it take for not only the guys but also women in relationships,what does it take to get them to truely open up with what they maybe feeling in the relationship?

Unit 5302 · 10-22-2001, 08:12 AM

Me, I was just hangin on. She knows how I felt. Told her, tried to show her all the time.

I knew the odds, but I took the chance for her anyway. She was worth it, still is, but not when she's with somebody else and I'm just gonna get my heart torn out every day I talk to her.

Time to go to my lame *** job.

joe4speed · 10-22-2001, 12:59 PM

Mine was a messed up story as well...
This girl I work with and she is perfect, and beautiful, and married(seperated for 8 mos though) We have gotten together, and we have the most amazing times together, I believe she may be the perfect woman for me. But here's what happened:
I was at her house a couple sundays ago watching a movie in her room. She has a daughter and she woke up and my g/f went into her room to lay with her for a while. While she was laying there, I hear the front door open and in walks her husband into the room. I had no clue on what to do. So I sat there, he tried to turn on the lights, then walked out of the room and into his daughters room and told her to "get the ***** out here" so he walked out into the living room, and I'm still sitting on the bed wondering if i should jump out the window or what... After like 5 mins goes by he yells "hurry the ***** up" and she walks into her room and tells me I should go. So I got up and grabbed my stuff and walked by him in the hallway, and as soon as I touched the doorknob to leave, he says "where do you think you're goin?" I turn around and say "who the ***** are you?" (i knew) and he said, "I'm her husband, who the ***** are YOU?" I wasn't sure what to say, so I said I was just there hangin out. He started walking towards me and I started walking towards him and she stepped in between us and ushered me out the door.
I didn't hear anything from her for about 18 hours, and I thought she was hurt or whatever, the guy is a psycho so who knew?? Finally her sisters called me and told me she wanted them to tell me she was ok and not to call the house. so I wound up not talking to her for 4 days after that. This is a girl who I'd talk to at least 5 times a day to on the phone or whatever. He went back up to NH after 4 days of being here, but said he'd be back down real soon, but not telling her when to make her paranoid.

So now she's really confused, she thinks she owes it to him to give it another try, even though she knows it will end up the same way as it was before. She says she really, really loves me, and a part of her still loves him, and she feels alot of guilt and pity for him, and because they have a daughter.
I told her I'd wait for a while and we'd see what happens. They got into a fight last night and she said she was filing for divorce today, but he talked to her after and now she's not sure what to do again.
I know I'm the crazy one here for wanting to wait, but this woman makes me feel like I have NEVER felt before, in such a short time.
Almost everyone says RUN, but it would be a shame to pass up someone who makes me feel this way. I've been in love before, but never so strongly. I guess I'm mental!!!

And we do talk, One thing I am, is a communicator, I know how important it is to let them know your true feelings. We have discussed this whole thing for hours upon hours upon hours, but she's just sooo confused...

------------------
Joe! 1988 GT, 167,000 miles!!! 13.58@105mph Check out my listing! Click here! Or my website:www.joe4speed.com
99 Ninja ZX-6R:10.32@135mph!
1993 Olds Eighty Eight LSS 16.40@88.8mph

Mercury · 10-22-2001, 01:11 PM

Dang my situation sounds trivial and tirfe compared to some of you all's. Thats really puttin you between a rock and a hard place JL.

Crazy Horse GT · 10-22-2001, 01:37 PM

damn joe you better run away man, when i was 18 iwas uuhhm you know, i had no idea this girl was married until ,i was sitting in her house, in walks a big!guy he looked at me and said ,who the f--- are you so i said who are you his reply, her husband ,jeeze out the door i went he chased me down the highway popping off rounds from a rifle or shotgun ,glad i had a 4v carb & he didnt ,i have never even looked at another married gal since then, i did have a couple of bullet holes in my chevelle, but what the hel- at least it wasnt in me, man get out while you can , take it from a still alive middle aged crazy marty.

------------------

joe4speed · 10-22-2001, 02:47 PM

LOL thankfully no guns were involved!!! That would suck! Maybe I should always carry now!!

I know the easy thing to do would be to run, but I just feel so strongly, ya know...? Maybe I'm just a glutton for punishment?!
Joe

1969Mach1 · 10-22-2001, 02:49 PM

Yeh I know what you mean, no one ever expresses there true feelings. One of the main reasons cause you sometimes feel a way and you arn't certain of how you are really feeling, or you care for the person alot and you don't want to hurt them with your confusion. Anyway brings me to my next point, I think man should give up on woman, and just marry there Mustangs (or car), you can always love them and they'll love you back, there fairly simple to fix (usually just physical work) not mental. lol And if it dies, you can go pick another one up and bring her home and make her look pretty. They never complain about you doing something. =) lol I'm just kidding, woman are great what would we do without them? Who knows, they are all special in there own way, just got to find the one that matchs you.
Now I must be going and make sure my girlfriend doesn't read this post.

Cause I know she doesn't like it when I work on my car and not come see her. hehehe... But I know she will be happy when she comes to see me pick her up at school next year when my car is all done. =) I can't wait to show up all the Honda's with the big exhaust that do nothing at all. lol Ohh... yes the glory of having a real muscle car. lol

Take it easy all,
And Keep on Lovin' you Cars and Woman.

------------------
1969 Mach 1, 351 Windsor, 4 Speed.

Moving At The Speed Of Sound.

Coupe Devil · 10-22-2001, 03:33 PM

The ring is the first thing I llok for. Ask any of my frieds that I hang out with. We'll be out and see a hot girl, I will look for the ring and inform them if she has one. If not Fair game man, if so Fair game man. Sometimes it's worth it trust me, sometimes it aint Trust me on that to. And Crazyhorse I know how you feel. Gun shots make you run faster and a car move better than it ever has. Doesn't it. Something else that just came to mind. In 9 days I will have been single for four years straight. That ******* sucks when I think about it.
------------------
'93 lx notch 4 banger (drive it to work currently), Using the 306, 8.8 posi, 4.10's, summit rear cover, elec. fan, cowl hood, wieand stealth intake, Heddman 1-3/4 long tubes, holley 650 d.p.carb., built c-?, e-303, full autometer guages, msd box, mallory unilite dist, and coil, roll cage, summit seat, subs, 15x10's in the back with slicks, skinnies up front, custom dash, all in use for 1988 Hatch Drag Car. Heres my site. http://www.angelfire.com/extreme2/ponypower

[This message has been edited by pony_power_90 (edited 10-22-2001).]

Fox Body · 10-22-2001, 06:00 PM

Hmmm. you guys scare me. I met this girl over the weekend.... I've always been the careful one and it has almost always spared much grief.

Except for this one time... I'd rather not get into. You can just say I learned so now I'm careful...

Good luck guys... to all of us.

-----------------------------------------
351W-powered 1979 Ford Mustang notchback
Stock 5.8L under custom made 4" cowl, C4 w/ shift kit
Holley 750 cfm, Edelbrock Performer RPM intake
1 5/8" MAC shorty headers, Al driveshaft
2.5" Off road H-pipe, 2-chamber Flowmasters
Front: 225/60/15, Rear: 255/60/15 Eagle GT II
Weld wheels (15x6;15x8), 8.8" Rear w/ 3.55s
14 x 4” K&N air filter. Only a few months b4 Project FOX begins!!!

"Red, thou art my companion. Hasten now your quickened metamorphosis to Green that I may conquer all who dare abide there beside me. May they be left thither behind burnt black." ---Fox Body

slider · 10-22-2001, 08:48 PM

dont ever mess with a married woman. either wait until she fix things up with her husband or youhold up for your own good.

bad things happen, trust me

dont get involved

TXinPA · 10-23-2001, 06:18 PM

When it comes to communication, I loooove to communicate. My fiance (kinda) says he is good at communicating too. BUT... It never fails that we get into huge arguements about the most stupid things. And we are both too stubborn to back down. Ugh.. Makes me have second thaughts.

Godslayer · 10-23-2001, 10:23 PM

Hey, you will never know if a relationship will work until you try it. Unfortunately, it usually ends up badly. It's hard to find two people who can put up with each other's crap for an extended period of time. I've had my share of @ss relationships, and they can only get better hehe. The trick is not to take it personally. I know a lot of times that's hard, but you have to try your best. Screw it! Drink some beers, go to some parties, and let the hooters flow like good wine!

------------------
91 Cougar XR7
Borla Exhaust,
Get's me to school

RIP:
87 GT
Full exhaust, K&N, KB Subs, BBK STB, homeade dumps...

10-22-2001, 02:06 AM	#1
Mustanguy Guest Posts: n/a	UNIT,MERCURY,@ the rest of you guys that are having relationship troubles,step in Honestly guys I sit here and I read your posts and wonder why people wont say what they are truely feeling in a relationship. I'm in a relationship myself been in one for 4 or 5 years now.In this relationship I need to move in order to be with this particular person,which I have no trouble with.What I have trouble understanding these days is why dont people open up with their true feelings? Why dont they say when sumthin isn't goin the way that they would like it to be? I don't understand... This person I'm involved with says she loves me,which I do not doubt,but at the same time,there is this problem again that I talk about above,and you all know what I'm talkin about,the person that in the relationship isn't happy about sumthin but yet you have no idea what it could be.You can tell in their actions,etc. ------------------ Paxton Blown 87GT ICQ:91504337

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10-22-2001, 02:19 AM	#2
Mercury The Redneck James Bond Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Fayetteville NC Posts: 1,707	Mustangguy I have tried that route. No matter what, I said or did something wrong. We tried for a year to work on our communication skills. All we did was fight. I never did anything right according to her. No matter how much Time I spent with her during the week, and anyother time, she would get so PISSED if I said "Honey, can I spend some time with the guys." Even then, around 9 at night (When things just start to get interesting) she calls me on my cell phone and lays this guilt trip on me about not seeing her. I'd go over her house and spend the rest of the night there. My friends were getting mad at me, my girl was getting mad at me, it was like no matter what plans I had made, and she had Okay'd earlier, she would call and expect me to drop everything to come over. Now if it was an emergency, I would, But I hate being Jerked around like that, and I HATE DOING that to my friends/girlfriends. All I asked for was one Saturday night out of every two weeks to go racing and hang out with the guys. She didnt trust me at all, she thought I was off running around on her. She even accused me of seeing TIM C's sister (Shes engaded and her Fiancee' hangs out with us). Oh well. I told her how I felt, and did it as civalized and calm as possible. She just didnt seem to care, even though I bent over Backwards to make her happy. I'm doing what I like now, well for the most part........... Given the circumstances, I feel like I'm handling things pretty good. Maybe because I can breathe now.

10-22-2001, 02:40 AM	#3
Mustanguy Guest Posts: n/a	Mercury I understand man,I guess I didn't make myself clear on my topic.What I was tryin to say in my topic is what does it take for not only the guys but also women in relationships,what does it take to get them to truely open up with what they maybe feeling in the relationship?

10-22-2001, 08:12 AM	#4
Unit 5302 Registered Member Join Date: May 1999 Posts: 5,246	Me, I was just hangin on. She knows how I felt. Told her, tried to show her all the time. I knew the odds, but I took the chance for her anyway. She was worth it, still is, but not when she's with somebody else and I'm just gonna get my heart torn out every day I talk to her. Time to go to my lame *** job.

10-22-2001, 12:59 PM	#5
joe4speed He said Member...heh, heh Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: Jupiter, Florida U.S.A. Posts: 3,718	Mine was a messed up story as well... This girl I work with and she is perfect, and beautiful, and married(seperated for 8 mos though) We have gotten together, and we have the most amazing times together, I believe she may be the perfect woman for me. But here's what happened: I was at her house a couple sundays ago watching a movie in her room. She has a daughter and she woke up and my g/f went into her room to lay with her for a while. While she was laying there, I hear the front door open and in walks her husband into the room. I had no clue on what to do. So I sat there, he tried to turn on the lights, then walked out of the room and into his daughters room and told her to "get the *** out here" so he walked out into the living room, and I'm still sitting on the bed wondering if i should jump out the window or what... After like 5 mins goes by he yells "hurry the * up" and she walks into her room and tells me I should go. So I got up and grabbed my stuff and walked by him in the hallway, and as soon as I touched the doorknob to leave, he says "where do you think you're goin?" I turn around and say "who the * are you?" (i knew) and he said, "I'm her husband, who the * are YOU?" I wasn't sure what to say, so I said I was just there hangin out. He started walking towards me and I started walking towards him and she stepped in between us and ushered me out the door. I didn't hear anything from her for about 18 hours, and I thought she was hurt or whatever, the guy is a psycho so who knew?? Finally her sisters called me and told me she wanted them to tell me she was ok and not to call the house. so I wound up not talking to her for 4 days after that. This is a girl who I'd talk to at least 5 times a day to on the phone or whatever. He went back up to NH after 4 days of being here, but said he'd be back down real soon, but not telling her when to make her paranoid. So now she's really confused, she thinks she owes it to him to give it another try, even though she knows it will end up the same way as it was before. She says she really, really loves me, and a part of her still loves him, and she feels alot of guilt and pity for him, and because they have a daughter. I told her I'd wait for a while and we'd see what happens. They got into a fight last night and she said she was filing for divorce today, but he talked to her after and now she's not sure what to do again. I know I'm the crazy one here for wanting to wait, but this woman makes me feel like I have NEVER felt before, in such a short time. Almost everyone says RUN, but it would be a shame to pass up someone who makes me feel this way. I've been in love before, but never so strongly. I guess I'm mental!!! And we do talk, One thing I am, is a communicator, I know how important it is to let them know your true feelings. We have discussed this whole thing for hours upon hours upon hours, but she's just sooo confused... ------------------ Joe! 1988 GT, 167,000 miles!!!** 13.58@105mph Check out my listing! Click here! Or my website:www.joe4speed.com 99 Ninja ZX-6R:10.32@135mph! 1993 Olds Eighty Eight LSS 16.40@88.8mph

10-22-2001, 01:11 PM	#6
Mercury The Redneck James Bond Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Fayetteville NC Posts: 1,707	Dang my situation sounds trivial and tirfe compared to some of you all's. Thats really puttin you between a rock and a hard place JL.

10-22-2001, 01:37 PM	#7
Crazy Horse GT Registered Member Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Sale Creek, TN. C. S. A. Posts: 4,652	damn joe you better run away man, when i was 18 iwas uuhhm you know, i had no idea this girl was married until ,i was sitting in her house, in walks a big!guy he looked at me and said ,who the f--- are you so i said who are you his reply, her husband ,jeeze out the door i went he chased me down the highway popping off rounds from a rifle or shotgun ,glad i had a 4v carb & he didnt ,i have never even looked at another married gal since then, i did have a couple of bullet holes in my chevelle, but what the hel- at least it wasnt in me, man get out while you can , take it from a still alive middle aged crazy marty. ------------------

10-22-2001, 02:47 PM	#8
joe4speed He said Member...heh, heh Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: Jupiter, Florida U.S.A. Posts: 3,718	LOL thankfully no guns were involved!!! That would suck! Maybe I should always carry now!! I know the easy thing to do would be to run, but I just feel so strongly, ya know...? Maybe I'm just a glutton for punishment?! Joe

10-22-2001, 02:49 PM	#9
1969Mach1 HEY I CAN SET A NAME NOW! Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 2,556	Yeh I know what you mean, no one ever expresses there true feelings. One of the main reasons cause you sometimes feel a way and you arn't certain of how you are really feeling, or you care for the person alot and you don't want to hurt them with your confusion. Anyway brings me to my next point, I think man should give up on woman, and just marry there Mustangs (or car), you can always love them and they'll love you back, there fairly simple to fix (usually just physical work) not mental. lol And if it dies, you can go pick another one up and bring her home and make her look pretty. They never complain about you doing something. =) lol I'm just kidding, woman are great what would we do without them? Who knows, they are all special in there own way, just got to find the one that matchs you. Now I must be going and make sure my girlfriend doesn't read this post. Cause I know she doesn't like it when I work on my car and not come see her. hehehe... But I know she will be happy when she comes to see me pick her up at school next year when my car is all done. =) I can't wait to show up all the Honda's with the big exhaust that do nothing at all. lol Ohh... yes the glory of having a real muscle car. lol Take it easy all, And Keep on Lovin' you Cars and Woman. ------------------ 1969 Mach 1, 351 Windsor, 4 Speed. Moving At The Speed Of Sound.

10-22-2001, 03:33 PM	#10
Coupe Devil Moderator Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Myrtle Beach SC Posts: 1,643	The ring is the first thing I llok for. Ask any of my frieds that I hang out with. We'll be out and see a hot girl, I will look for the ring and inform them if she has one. If not Fair game man, if so Fair game man. Sometimes it's worth it trust me, sometimes it aint Trust me on that to. And Crazyhorse I know how you feel. Gun shots make you run faster and a car move better than it ever has. Doesn't it. Something else that just came to mind. In 9 days I will have been single for four years straight. That ******* sucks when I think about it. ------------------ '93 lx notch 4 banger (drive it to work currently), Using the 306, 8.8 posi, 4.10's, summit rear cover, elec. fan, cowl hood, wieand stealth intake, Heddman 1-3/4 long tubes, holley 650 d.p.carb., built c-?, e-303, full autometer guages, msd box, mallory unilite dist, and coil, roll cage, summit seat, subs, 15x10's in the back with slicks, skinnies up front, custom dash, all in use for 1988 Hatch Drag Car. Heres my site. http://www.angelfire.com/extreme2/ponypower [This message has been edited by pony_power_90 (edited 10-22-2001).]

10-22-2001, 06:00 PM	#11
Fox Body Mustang Maniac Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: GA, U.S.A Posts: 2,266	Hmmm. you guys scare me. I met this girl over the weekend.... I've always been the careful one and it has almost always spared much grief. Except for this one time... I'd rather not get into. You can just say I learned so now I'm careful... Good luck guys... to all of us. ----------------------------------------- 351W-powered 1979 Ford Mustang notchback Stock 5.8L under custom made 4" cowl, C4 w/ shift kit Holley 750 cfm, Edelbrock Performer RPM intake 1 5/8" MAC shorty headers, Al driveshaft 2.5" Off road H-pipe, 2-chamber Flowmasters Front: 225/60/15, Rear: 255/60/15 Eagle GT II Weld wheels (15x6;15x8), 8.8" Rear w/ 3.55s 14 x 4” K&N air filter. Only a few months b4 Project FOX* begins!!!* "Red, thou art my companion. Hasten now your quickened metamorphosis to Green that I may conquer all who dare abide there beside me. May they be left thither behind burnt black." ---Fox Body

10-22-2001, 08:48 PM	#12
slider Registered Member Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: San Diego, CA, USA Posts: 86	dont ever mess with a married woman. either wait until she fix things up with her husband or youhold up for your own good. bad things happen, trust me dont get involved

10-23-2001, 06:18 PM	#13
TXinPA Registered Member Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 120	When it comes to communication, I loooove to communicate. My fiance (kinda) says he is good at communicating too. BUT... It never fails that we get into huge arguements about the most stupid things. And we are both too stubborn to back down. Ugh.. Makes me have second thaughts.

10-23-2001, 10:23 PM	#14
Godslayer Registered Member Join Date: Mar 1999 Location: Largo, FL USA Posts: 274	Hey, you will never know if a relationship will work until you try it. Unfortunately, it usually ends up badly. It's hard to find two people who can put up with each other's crap for an extended period of time. I've had my share of @ss relationships, and they can only get better hehe. The trick is not to take it personally. I know a lot of times that's hard, but you have to try your best. Screw it! Drink some beers, go to some parties, and let the hooters flow like good wine! ------------------ 91 Cougar XR7 Borla Exhaust, Get's me to school RIP: 87 GT Full exhaust, K&N, KB Subs, BBK STB, homeade dumps...