The most evil holiday of the year...

[silver_pilate]

Well, allow me to be the first to say...one day early nontheless...Happy Valentine's Day.

On this day of days, one can observe new romances just being launched, old lovers becoming closer friends, and old friends becoming new lovers. On this day, flowers abound. The sound of singing rings through the street as those corny Valentine Sing-O-Grams deliver their messages. Cards, candy, jewelry, and kisses are merrily exchanged by those who are madly in love and by those who are just pretending to be so.

On this day, countless couples will spend a quiet hour in company with candle light and wine. Beaus will comment on how the candle's glow illuminates hair and fair skin, all-the-while the shadows dance and frolic in revelry.

On this day, untold numbers of lovers will endure the nervous silence only to hear their partner utter those fatefull words, "I do." New lives will begin together. Church bells will ring with the joy of occasion.

On this day, a great many people will revel in happiness and love, and on this day, many people will sit and wonder, "When will my time come? When will this drought end? When will my love be requited?"

I'm reminded of the great poet, John Donne, as I listen to the colloquy of the wedding bells, and I wonder for whom the bell tolls. It surely does not toll for me. Or maybe, in some strange way it does. Perhaps the un-named bells toll the breath of a promise into my heart. Perhaps the bells know that someday, I too shall feel the joy that they now express. Maybe.

Until then, I'll smile and wave as I pass in the street. I'll tell that same old line...that I'm doing fine. And I'm sure I am. However, within me there remains a silent space into which I could never thrust a lance of sound so harsh as human word. In this place lies only echos of times past and the echos of words not yet spoken. I shall not stir this sea of time, but only "whisper softly to the ghosts And linger there a moment as in prayer, Adding another to the voiceless hosts Unnumbered ages have abandoned there." (--L'Amour)

On this day, if you feel the same as I, and I know there are many who do, I have but this left to say. To quote a great author and poet:

If there is any beauty after this
Or any quiet joy, or imagery
Of happiness that we may share, then we
Must never hesitate, nor be remiss;
If in the after years the deep abyss
Of sorrow draws you close, and mournfully
The old dreams die, then you must turn to me
And to this love that needs no emphasis.

If, when tomorrow comes, the things you knew
No longer are, but like an empty town
Whose windows catch the fading sunset flame,
Your eyes reflect your loneliness, and you
Watch one by one the swifter years go down--
The turn to me, for I shall be the same.

--Louis L'Amour

"Happy" Valentine's Day.

Reflectfully,

--nathan