Update: Remember when she left me after 4.5 years? well....

[Skyman]

Thanks guys. Wow this is a great relationship advice board. I have tried to be just friends with her, and its great having that person to talk to again, but eventually she finds a way to get it back onto us. Shes begged and pleeded, says she will pay for couseling, wants anything for me to give her a chance to redeem herself. I always believe that everyone deserves a second, chance, we all make mistakes. At one point I made a mistake about leaving her, granted it wasnt in the same fashion she left me. I dont think you can ever rule anything out 100%, you never know exactly what the future brings. I really think she needs time though, shes on an emotional roller coaster and is once again blinded by them. Obviously I loved her for a lot of reasons, and some of those reasons are still there. Im just not ready for a relationship, and shes messing with my head now making it spin even more. In time I dont know what will develop, but I really dont know what now. I just dont even have any idea what I want in a relationship now, or even if I want one at all, maybe I just want friends. Relationships are a mess, and I need to have time to myself to figure out what I want before I can be with anyone. And Im seeing this other girl I really liked, and things moved a bit fast, and now ive tried to put on the brakes. IM scared of being hurt again, Im scared I dont know what I want. Im scared that shes leaving, and if I get into anything I'll get my heart broken again. I also wonder how breanne has affected my feelings. I really dont know at this time. I just have to figure it out. Any how..... thanks again guys..... well see what the future holds, I really dont know, and dont plan on anything, well see what develops.

-Skyler