Its painfully Obvious that I need to Relearn of few things.

[mustangdani55]

Hey Damien... I have something to say to you and i will pm you on that..but I need to say this to rocket99GT. Some of us that post here are a little more sympathetic than others..you being one of those in the other class..

If you didn't notice, there are alot of "friends" around here and all i have to say to you is if you don't like what Mercury or anyone else puts out on the board..DON'T read it and certainly don't respond to it.

Mercury is always there for us when we need him, and if he wants to share his feelings about whatever, he hass that right and we as his friends have the right to read and respond to his heartache.

Nobody invited you to this party, so .......

[Mercury]

Hmmmmm Intersting Rocket 99 GT. Still upset I see at my post about your opinion on larger displacement engines?

If you dont care to read my posts, then why do you? Seems to be a matter of choice. As for growing up, I think I have. I just care to post my feelings, and ask for advice with people I trust. Wouldnt you.

As for work, who really enjoys there job? Do you?

As for taking hits, I'm obviously capable of it, or I would not be seeing anyone, nor would I be working where I work at. Hmmmm Isnt that obvious. Maybe you didnt consider things carefully before making your post.

I'm management, I have alot of responsablitly at my job, I'm in charge of a good number of people and there productivity. I have to answer to any productivity problems and report to higher ups. I pay my own bills, put my self through six years of full time college while working. How is that not being responsible or grown up. I have made the time to teach myself the thing that I am intersted in when the college does not offer course's.

If any one here is tired of my posts other than Rocket 99. Tell me, and I will go away.

I fail to see how the lack of confidence in ones self is a sign of not bieng grown up. If you have taken the time, or can comprehend the under lying meaning, I think that you would see that the root of my problems isnt indecisiveness, or lack of maturity, but lack of confidence. Read alittle closer next time bub.

Mercury signing out.

[Mercury]

Same goes for you MustangBelle. Every women does not think like you or have the same fundamental feelings or views on relationships. That is so Dear Abbie like.

[Mustangbelle306]

Originally posted by mustangdani55
Hey Damien... I have something to say to you and i will pm you on that..but I need to say this to rocket99GT. Some of us that post here are a little more sympathetic than others..you being one of those in the other class..

If you didn't notice, there are alot of "friends" around here and all i have to say to you is if you don't like what Mercury or anyone else puts out on the board..DON'T read it and certainly don't respond to it.

Mercury is always there for us when we need him, and if he wants to share his feelings about whatever, he hass that right and we as his friends have the right to read and respond to his heartache.

Nobody invited you to this party, so .......

I think you are misunderstanding his post. This isn't meant to be some "bash poor mercury" party Its kinda like ripping the band aid off REAL fast...I value a friend MORE that tells me the God honest truth, no BS, as opposed to someone that molly coddles me 24/7. I think its nice what you do for Mercury, but dont rag on someone else for trying the more straightforward approach.....

[Crazy Horse GT]

rocket99gt hey no flames ok get off the merc man, have you ever read his funny stories, there are more of them than him just crying,sorry im not flaming you but back down,merc i got your back,see ya,marty.

[Mustangbelle306]

Originally posted by Mercury
Same goes for you MustangBelle. Every women does not think like you or have the same fundamental feelings or views on relationships. That is so Dear Abbie like.

HAHAHAHAHA you mean the views that all people are inherently good, and people shoudn't stereotype and blame others??? Heaven forbid women have that mindset lemme tell ya... Or maybe that men are misunderstood, and that women make the same mistakes that men do, and we're all human...perish the thought!!!

Not only that, all my relationship posts are POSITIVE, meant to uplift people and "share my happiness" (yeah, that was cheesy, I know) not to complain and whine about how I keep doing the same stuff over and over...

[mean81GT]

i've been reading along, knowing where merc is comin from because i've been there. everythime i think of something to say, i read the next post and someone else said it. i read this thread from the beginning, and i did so on my own will. the point of belonging to a messageboard is to discuss your likes, dislikes, opinions, feelings, stories, and whatever else you want. this happens to be a Mustang messageboard. but we talk about alot of other things too. When people get together, they sometimes become friends. When people have friends, they ask advice of their friends. They also need a place to vent. I know I do.

If you read a post, and you don't care to participate in the thread, close it and move on to another one. you have that right, as much as Merc has the right to talk to us, his friends.

oh, and mustangbelle, i find it very interesting how you give advice at 1:36PM and support Merc's need for advice and at 2:14PM you denounce the fact that he asks for that advice...

[mustangdani55]

RIGHT ON DUDE!!!!!!!

Merc, all your friends that have seen you thru this one and the last one sympathise



LOVE YA

[Coupe Devil]

Hey man, Drink a case and call me in the morning. Thats the only advice left to give. YOU do what YOU feel is right. No matter what the outcome, it will be best that way.

Brad

[tireburner163]

Originally posted by Mustangbelle306
I value a friend MORE that tells me the God honest truth, no BS, as opposed to someone that molly coddles me 24/7.

Mustangbelle306 Well you see, I'm not BS'ing Mercury. I actually care what happens, and try to help. I don't decounce him for posting about it. If you don't want to read the post, don't. But don't complain about how he souldn't post it. You said that you only post postivie stuff about you relationship.(which BTW Merc. does) If you only want to post the postitive stuff that's fine, but don't denounce Merc for posting the negative aspects. Some people want the opinions of other people who have gone throught the same thing. Or if your like me you might actully considered some of the people on the board "friends" in a way and you want them to know.

Rocket 99GT You said "a bunch of guys in this forum that are tired of seeing your posts about girl problems or your stories about the place where you work." What bunch of guys? So far your the only one. Could it be that there aren't "a bunch of guys"

P.S. Merc there are a lot of us out here that really care. The MW wouldn't be the same without you.

[Mr 5 0]

Thank you everyone for your words of wisdom. They have helped me understand things, and see things a lot clearer. - Mercury

Merc; I think that says about all I need to know on this subject; that you feel well-served by the opinions offered from people who want to help.

**********

The purpose of this 'open' forum is for members/friends to share whatever interests them. Some things will be silly and some will be serious. This thread was one of the more serious type but worth reading and commenting on for some.

I believe Mercury has made it clear that he received some useful information here. The fact that he feels confident enough in the concern of the people on this forum to state his lack of confidence in other areas of his life is a testament to the maturity of the forum's members.

We've seen some tough talk here regarding Merc's stated problems and his angst regarding his current situation and frankly that is to be expected when a wide variety of people view a post and respond; not everyone will see the situation sympathetically or agree with each others point of view. So be it. If everyone agreed all the time it would get pretty dull.

I have to concur with the point made earlier that if one has grown tired of the man's posts, then 'don't go there' when you see his User Name on the topic. Free choice.

I would add that if we have something negative to state in a response, try to do at least do so with some tact. Think about how your words will appear and go back and edit your post if it looks too harsh or comes off too negative.

I think it's obvious that nattering back and forth at each other over who-said-what-and-why is not very useful to anyone and eventually goes nowhere.

**********

Finally; I want to thank Mercury, Brad, Odie and anyone else who was kind enough to say nice things about my post. I appreciate it of course but I certainly don't have any corner on wisdom nor do I know all the answers.
No one does.

I comment with the perspective of one who has experienced most of the things people on this forum go through and are confused about. It's still just one person's opinion. With the disadvantage of not knowing someone personally and only having the information a poster supplies, I have to comment in a somewhat general manner, not knowing if what I understand about a situation is exactly correct.

My advice may be worth about what it costs, but I want to be of help when and where I can and it costs me nothing, either, so why not?

Thanks again for all the input here. It's appreciated.

[Mustangbelle306]

Originally posted by mean81GT
oh, and mustangbelle, i find it very interesting how you give advice at 1:36PM and support Merc's need for advice and at 2:14PM you denounce the fact that he asks for that advice...

oh, and mean81GT, I think its great that you have the time to inspect the time of my posts...

I wasn't really giving advice. I was saying that it was nice that he finally learned how to look within himself and find out what he is doing wrong. Not only that, he has already started that "not all women think like me" so obviously my advice has not been, and will not be appreciated . I also think that we all need to be a little less dramatic here...we all know that Mercury is part of the site, as well as Rocket99GT. We don't really need to pat each other on the back and state how much we contribute to the site...we all know WE make up MW

[Mach 1]

I can see both sides of this.

It s nice to nurture and support people, but sometimes what a person needs most is a good "kick in the *****", which is the approach mustangbelle and rocket 99 were taking.

I dont think they were bashing, just trying to help mercury out of his depressed times by tellin him to suck it up and quit whining, which does work sometimes also.

Keep an open mind here, thats all.....were all in this together.

[Mustangbelle306]

Originally posted by Mach 1
I can see both sides of this.

It s nice to nurture and support people, but sometimes what a person needs most is a good "kick in the *****", which is the approach mustangbelle and rocket 99 were taking.

I dont think they were bashing, just trying to help mercury out of his depressed times by tellin him to suck it up and quit whining, which does work sometimes also.

Keep an open mind here, thats all.....were all in this together.

That's the smartest thing I've read in this post Thanks

[tireburner163]

Rocket 99 GT came across as(to me) telling Mercury to shut up and quit whining and that no one wanted to hear about it.

Merc asked for advice and I tried to help him in the best way I knew how.

[joe4speed]

I didn't read this whole thread, but it seems I am the same in that aspect too... I tend to fall quickly and hope things will be the way I envision them from previous relationships. I know this can't be and have to exercise some big time self control to not push, and let theng happen at their own rate.

Good luck, and just try to go with the natural flow!

[Fox Body]

The thing we must all remember here is that it is much easier to get offended from reading someone's post in a message board on a flat screen with 2 dimensional words and colors than it is talking with someone face to face. The computer is cold and inanimate.

For all the people who are getting "offended" or taking "offense" from Mustangbelle's comments for no SOLID reason and for those who felt they need to jump on the "defend Mercury" bandwagon: If this conversation were held in a room where we could all see each other and each other's facial expressions, it'd be a different atmosphere. The atmosphere of this post over the internet has gotten a little sour. It's not about all that. We're all friends here so lighten up. People who easily get offended--- grow some thicker skin please, b/c you will not survive in the world if you get offended so easily. You will be the first ones to get fired from a job b/c what the boss said "offended" you and you had to "put him in his place."

For the other side, as Mr 5 0 hinted, you guys who are giving the "tough love" need to make it clear what your intentions are. We are separated and cannot feel the "vibes" of each other. It is easy to misconstrue your "tough love" comments and so you need to take the time to add that extra statement that gets your point across in a friendly way (if that was your intention in the first place).

Hg, you post as much as you want about whatever. We don't mind. Rocket stated that there are a lot of MW members who are tired of reading about your love life and job life, but I assure you that there more of us who aren't tired of it and enjoy your contribution to this site, such as myself. Yes, you need to to be tough, but maybe that will come later. Right now, you feel like sharing your concerns here whether it's just to get things off your chest (or to vent), or if it is b/c you need advice and support. So we don't mind. Everybody is different. The "tough love" approach doesn't work for everybody (doesn't work for most people-- there's enough indifference and "tough love" out in the world )

Read the posts. Mercury has acknowledge the fact that he got a little pushy and needed to let off a little. Many of us told him that in a few of his previous posts about the firebird woman and he now realizes that to an extent, he was a little pushy and set his hopes a little too high too fast-- that he needs to "slow his roll" a little. Good, he already understands that so he's already conquered the first part of his problem-- knowing what it is and acknowledging it. Get off your "tough love" horse and give the brother a little sympathy. That's one of the problems with a lot of guys today, many think they are always just supposed to "be a man", "men don't cry", "keep a stiff upper lip", and all that crap and many of those guys either turn out deranged or just flat out indifferent to others' feelings. If you really want to show how much of a man you are, remember this: it takes a whole lot more guts to cry in public than it does to keep a "stiff upper lip."

To you others out there who don't agree with him posting these topics here or are "tired" of reading them, so what?!! then DON'T FLIPPIN READ THEM!!!! Why spend the effort and time to click on the link to the thread and spend enough time typing a message on your little keyboard just to add in your snotty little reply to a type of post you are tired of seeing??? Well, honestly, that is your opinion/feelings and you are just as entitled to them as Mercury or anyone else is to theirs...

I see it this way: I'm glad this message board is here. There are things that people can discuss here that they may feel more comfortable talking about such subjects b/c they do not really know the other people who post on this site. We all know that the more we disclose to others (especially those who are not family) about ourselves and about our problems the more vulnerable we make ourselves to snide remarks and being poked fun at for being weak or "soft" or whatever. This message board can provide an avenue that might allow someone to get something off his/her chest that he/she might have not been able tell a friend or family member b/c it would result in an uncomfortable situation. In some ways, for example, a guy may be more apt to talk about certain relationship problems in a message board where he doesn't KNOW the faces, but he knows he will get good advice and can share his concerns to people who care. Then he can get up from the computer and feel relieved that he got it off his chest, but at the same time not really having to worry about something like "Oh crap, why did I tell them that, now they're gonna pick at me for being soft" b/c he doesn't have to SEE us everyday or pass us in a hallway and get that uncomfortable silence that says "oh man, now this person knows this about me-- I shouldn't have said anything." I bet there are a lot of guys here that are able to open up a bit more while talking to their MW online buddies, b/c they cannot see the people who see their posts and the people cannot see them--- and in this case, that is a good thing. Everything has a purpose and I think that is a good thing-- this message board has a relevant cathartic quality to it and it is because of the people here who make it this way.

[Mustangbelle306]

I read all of that and I agree...ps I like the tangerine orange font

[Mach 1]

You can expect the same reactions and differences in opinion on this board as you will get in the real world, face to face or not.


Some poeple are nurturing, some arent. Some need nurturing, some dont.

If mercury cant handle the negative feedback, he shouldnt open himself up to it, here or anywhere else.

Actually, Mercury handled the negative feedback rather well, and I think the point was made.

He doesnt need 15 of you jumping to his defense IMO.

[Mercury]

Dang...What did I start here?

For those supporting me, Thank You. For those who don't, well, thank you anyway for taking the time to post your feelings.

I know that not everything said here will be positive. From all that I have gone through in life I find the petty negative remarks made here have little real affect on my morale.

I would be lying however if I said they didn't affect me to some extent, but no matter how negative the message (there were no real negative posts) there is still something to be learned from it. Be it about the person posting or that maybe they do have a valuable insight from another perspective.

What does irritate me though is the negative comments that are made without the person either fully reading or misunderstanding the original post.

Mr 5.0 made a very good point. Most of you may know me as a character but few understand the motivation and causes of my actions, beliefs or feelings that I form and have.

I think that is one of the reasons he offers such good advice; he has an understanding that he doesn't know all the circumstances (although I'm sure he can infer a lot).

For those of you whom don't like me or my posts as mentioned earlier: Dont read them! If all you have to say is "I TOLD YOU SO...Nah nah nah nah"...please don't bother. Not only is it rather childish, but it hurts the image of this wonderful site and could end up causing hard feelings.

Believe it or not, I'm a fairly open-minded person and I'm willing to listen to just about anything anyone has to say. I post the things that I do, not because of a lack of direct communication, but because I trust a lot of the people here, and am interested in what they have to say. I'm a pretty open person, and would more than likely act the same way face to face that I do here.
Just ask the people that post here that know me.

I trust alot of you, and I can - for the most part - tell who it is that I can. People like Crazy Horse, TireBurner, Unit, Mach1, FoxBody, SRV, and many others. I hold the utmost trust in some of you all; Topless In Texas and Mr 5.0 are great examples.



FOX BODY:

Its been killing me man...Whats HGstand for???? You keep refering to me as HG.