Jokes of the day

cyberstang5.0 · 09-20-2002, 10:04 AM

What's the best form of birth control after 50?

Nudity.

***************

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

45 lb.

***************

What's the difference between a boyfriend and
husband?

45 minutes.

***************
How many women does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they just sit there in the dark and *****.

***************

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are
sensitive, caring, and good looking?

Because those men already have boyfriends.

**************

What's the difference between a new husband and a new
dog?

After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

***************

What makes men chase women they have no intention of
marrying?

The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no
intention of driving.

**************

What do you call a smart blonde?

A golden retriever.

**************

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third
grade. Who has the biggest boobs?

The blonde, because she's 18.

**************

Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?

Because they have cotton balls.

*************

What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?

A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

***************

What did the blonde say when she found out she was
pregnant?

"Are you sure it's mine?"

**************

What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?

Beer Nuts are $1 and Deer Nuts are always under a
buck.

**************

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?

Mace will do that to you.

***************

Why did OJ Simpson want to move to Kentucky?

Everyone has the same DNA.

**************

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm
shorter than the other?

A speech impediment.

***************

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact with
a woman?

Breasts don't have eyes.

****************

What's the difference between a Southern zoo and a
Northern zoo?

A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the
front of the cage along with a recipe.

***************

What's the Cuban National Anthem?

Row row row your boat.

***************

What's the difference between a Northern fairy tale
and a Southern fairy tale?

A Northern fairy tale begins "Once upon a time."
A Southern fairy tale begins 'Y'all ain't gonna
believe this ****."

09-20-2002, 10:04 AM	#1
cyberstang5.0 347ci of HORSE POWER!!! Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 1,416	Jokes of the day What's the best form of birth control after 50? Nudity. ************* What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 lb. *********** What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband? 45 minutes. *********** How many women does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just sit there in the dark and *. *********** Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking? Because those men already have boyfriends. ********** What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you. *********** What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. ********** What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever. ********** A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade. Who has the biggest boobs? The blonde, because she's 18. ********** Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex? Because they have cotton balls. ********* What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has the pricks on the outside. *********** What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? "Are you sure it's mine?" ********** What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts? Beer Nuts are $1 and Deer Nuts are always under a buck. ********** Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? Mace will do that to you. *********** Why did OJ Simpson want to move to Kentucky? Everyone has the same DNA. ********** What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? A speech impediment. *********** Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact with a woman? Breasts don't have eyes. ************ What's the difference between a Southern zoo and a Northern zoo? A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with a recipe. *********** What's the Cuban National Anthem? Row row row your boat. *********** What's the difference between a Northern fairy tale and a Southern fairy tale? A Northern fairy tale begins "Once upon a time." A Southern fairy tale begins 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this **."

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